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Cold shower (1)

A heavy silence has settled between us.

My laughing in the kitchen was over. I should have remained in control and not let my guard down.

But it's impossible.

Elio makes me forget everything. His simple presence fills my life with unspeakable joy. I am like a drug addict in rehab who is offered a stick... Just for one night. And my body, my mind, and my heart are plunging back into addiction.

Elio takes a step back and looks at my outfit with contempt. He opens one of the drawers on the island that separates my kitchen from my living room and takes out a long meat knife.

Of course, he does.

He must have already opened and searched everything before I arrived. This is part and parcel of Elio's life.

Control.

Perfect control over everything and for everything.

No one escapes him—even me.

I was able to live away from him for three years. It was never easy, and I stopped counting the number of times I had to slap myself in the face
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