Karan
Early in the morning, the alarm clock rings. I struggle to open my eyes and rub my hands against them. Moving my hand forward I turn it off, half opening my eyes. I feel something on my body and immediately look behind, discovering Divya as she is hugging me from behind. I try to move her, part her away from me but my subconscious isn't ready to do that. How can a man on the earth resist a woman from being close to him? Her grip is tight enough, I can't drive her away as it can wake her up. Instead of doing that, I stare at her. Despite washing her face last night, her face has light spots of makeup which unnaturally looks good. My eyes move to her hand which was around my torso.
I hear a tap on the door and come out of my thoughts.
"Karan!", my mom knocks at the door. Divya moves a bit as the knock wakes her up.
"Coming mom", I try to get up which makes Divya open her eyes too. She immediately leaves me and makes a distance. I glance at her for a second and walk towards the door.
"Divya woke up?", mom asks, holding a tray of tea as I open the door. I shake my head and take the tray from her.
"Tell her to get ready properly. Some neighbours will be here to see her after breakfast", she smiles at me and leaves.
I walk into the room again and put the tray on the table. Divya comes out of the washroom and we share casual eye contact.
"Tea", I point at the tray and head to the closet.
"You still prefer half spoon of sugar?", she asks me, reaching out the tray. Every time she makes me realize that she has been loving me for the last 5 years it freaked me out.
"No. I prefer a whole spoon now", I lie. I still can't have much sugar but I want to let her know that I'm not the same Karan she loved. Now, she knows nothing about the new ME. I take out my clothes and go to the washroom.
I come out after 5 minutes and find her waiting for me.
"Come fast. It's already getting cold", she says, stirring the tea.
"You didn't need to wait for me", I throw a blank look and take a cup.
As soon as I take a sip, it bangs inside my mouth. So sweet! I can't handle this much sweet. My reaction automatically changes and I can't take another sip. Meanwhile, Divya holds the cup.
"Give it to me. I know it's very sweeter for you", she says in a blank tone.
"No. Thanks!", I don't leave the cup. "I told you my taste has changed and I can handle sweet now"
"Karan! You don't need to prove anything to me. I know you can't drink this. Leave it", she raises her voice and pulls the cup and suddenly it splashes on her hand.
"Aahhhh!", she cries out.
"Divya!", I immediately hold her hand, being panicked. She is hissing in pain as tears start rolling down from her eyes. I don't waste a second and run outside. Making my way to the kitchen, I rush inside where my mom and my aunty are preparing breakfast.
"What happened Karan?", mom asks as I hurriedly go near the refrigerator.
"Divya burnt her hand", I blurt out while finding some ice cubes.
"What? How?", mom exclaimed.
"She dropped tea", I tell her, taking the ice cubes and run towards my room as I hear mom instructing me to apply ointment also.
I hear her hissing in pain from outside.
"Is it burning badly?", I reach to her and grab her hand, placing an ice cube on the burnt area.
"Ahh", she sobs, looking at her wound.
"I told you to leave it. But you have become so stubborn Divi", I spit out, not realizing that I called her 'Divi'
I look at her as I don't hear her hissing in pain anymore. Surprisingly, I find her smiling at me.
"Why are you smiling? I haven't praised you", I mutter.
"But you called me 'Divi'", she beams. Our eyes bump into each other.
"Let me bring the ointment", I ignore her statement and reach the closet to find an ointment. I don't find it as I hardly get burnt. This girl has become very stubborn which she was not. There was a time when she used to accept everything I would say. She listened to me, she obeyed me. Now, she seems not to be interested in my views at all. While thinking all this, I finally find the ointment and get back to her.
Her hand turned red, I can figure out though she has worn Mehendi. I hold her hand gently and apply ointment on her skin. She hisses again. However, this time I blow air on her wound through the mouth.
"Don't wash it for a few hours", I instruct her and she shakes her head.
"Thank you"
"That's not needed. I did it just because…", I stop.
"You did it just because…?", she raises her eyebrows to know the rest of the statement.
"Nothing"
"No. It's not nothing. There's something, Karan. Till last night you didn't want to see my face. Now you're being worried about my wound. Why is that? What is that?", she urges. How can I answer her when I don't know what it is?
"Is it your concern or guilt?", she asks me in a firm voice. Her question surprises me, taking me back to the past. The word 'guilt' has pinched me hard. I can't figure out what to say.
"Guilt for burning my hand", she adds. I become normal as soon as she says the last line. She really meant the incident which happened just now.
"Oh! Yes", I tell her.
"What did you assume?", she raises her eyebrows. I glance at her for a moment and again move away.
"I was not assuming anything. You were overthinking", I oppose though the truth is I was assuming something bigger. She is about to say some but I don't let her. "Mom told you to get ready. There will be another ritual", I made a dirty look.
"Why do you look so pissed?", she asks me.
"Because I don't like all these useless rituals. You'll be seated like a showpiece among the ladies who will come to see your face and judge your looks", I shrug.
"I'm used to it, Karan", she grins. "I'm used to being a showpiece. It doesn't trouble me now"
Her words are triggering me hard every time. She leaves me with no words when I have a lot of things to do. By the time, she opens her bag and takes out some new sarees.
"Which one should I wear?", she immediately switches her mind and takes two sarees in each hand. One is orange and another one is golden. Those have more details but I don't trouble my eyes to examine it and focus on the colour only.
"It's your choice. Why are you asking me?", I pass a blank look and pull out my formals to wear.
"Because you're my husband", she exclaims, looking at me. I better ignore this topic.
"I think the golden one is better", she says, not getting an answer from me and peeks at me. "Are you going somewhere?", she rolls her eyes when she saw me wearing my formals.
"Yes. Office", I tell her, buttoning my shirt.
"Office? But today is the first day after our marriage", she utters, looking at me in disbelief.
"A marriage which I'm not interested in", I turn back.
"There's no value of your choice after the wedding. You need to accept the truth", she almost yells at me being furious. "It could be fair you said this before marriage"
"But I didn't know it was you", I tell her in a calm voice, looking at the mirror. I can see her anger-filled face through the mirror.
"That's not my fault, Karan", she grumbles.
"I know. And I'm not blaming you", I turn back to her after getting ready for office.
"But you're punishing me by doing all this. Why can't you accept the fact? I know it's tough for you. But it won't be easy if you don't try to make it easy. You're not even trying"
"What do you want me to try?", I raise my eyebrows.
"To work on our relationship. I told you before"
"And I told you before that it's impossible"
KaranI walk out of the room and slam the door on her face. I mean the same what I told her. It's impossible for me to get back to her, in fact to anyone. She'll have to understand that I'm not the kind of person who will be compromising his whole life for the sake of family and society. I reach downstairs. We still have a bunch of relatives at my place that I can hardly find the door. "Karan!", dad stops me when I cross the hall. "Where are you going?" "Office, dad", I tell him. "Office!", mom exclaims as she joins dad for tea. "You're going to the office today?" "Yes, mom. It's urgent", I tell her. "But you had taken a leave of 7 days, no?", dad asks. "It's something urgent. I need to attend", I lie. I don't want to b
KaranI had gotten more than 20 calls from mom. She was asking me to come back soon as everyone had their dinner but Divya is waiting for me. I didn't show any interest. In fact, I don't care if she's eating or not. I haven't told her to starve. Moreover, why can't Indian women have their dinner without their husbands? Is it because they actually care for their husbands or just to abide by a rule?Well, whatever it is I'm not gonna get trapped by her. If she's thinking by doing all this she can change my decision then it's completely her misconception and I can't help it.I look at the clock. It's near 10 pm. I guess now I can move to home. I'm feeling very exhausted and I badly need to sleep. But before that, I should have my dinner somewhere. I'm not gonna eat with her alone. It will freak me out.
KaranFlashback continuesThe sun shone brighter in summer days. Her face shimmered as the sun rays hit her skin. She had flawless golden skin which looked more attractive in sunshine. We walked inside the building and reached our classroom. "Hey, Karan! What a surprise!", Mitali reacted as she found me early in the class. "Trying to be early", I grinned, looking at Divya who sat on the same seat like every day. She opened her book and turned pages, lifting her spectacle from her nose bone with her index finger. I realized I was noticing her more carefully from yesterday.There's a fact that when you target someone to impress you automatically start noticing them more.
Karan "Divya, it's not the time to discuss all this", I finish wrapping the bandage and sigh. "Then when are we going to talk?", she wipes her tears and looks at me. Her eyes immediately get ruddy because of crying. "There's nothing to talk about. I'm just not ready to accept this marriage", driving my eyes away I push the plate towards her. "Finish your dinner now" "Then I'm ready to give us some time", she urges, looking at me, ignoring my last sentence. I don't look at her anymore since I know I know if I see her crying and suffering like this, I'll feel more guilty. "Say something", she touches my cheek. Her soft warm palm feels so cosy at this time when I'm exhausted. I wanted to tell her t
KaranI feel something heavy on my heart as I recall Meera. Neither I know where she is now nor I know why she left me like this. It's been 6 months she didn't show up. I tried to find her in almost every possible places. But she was gone. I had imagined my whole life with her. A guy like me completely changed himself only for her. I became serious in studies and my career just to secure the future with her. I never knew she would ditch me like this. I had never expected this from the girl I loved the most in the world.I'm not sure when I started crying. As soon as a teardrop falls on my hand I realize that I was weeping. This happens almost every night. I dream of her and wake up with her voice. I can't sleep the whole night, thinking about her. Though nowadays I'm handling myself well, this marriage again cracked me up. When I was struggling to get over my recent
KaranShe tightens her grip around my torso. I can sense her calming down. She has stopped sobbing, resting herself in my arms as if she waited for this for a long time. Somewhere in mind, I also felt better after permitting her to come close to me. I wonder if it's the allowance for moving into a new life with her or just sympathy for her which I felt after witnessing her crying like this. "I love you, Karan", she moans into my arms, clasping my t-shirt tightly. I wish I could say that back to her. Every girl deserves to hear those three magical words from her husband. Yet, we don't count among those couples. "It's too late, let's go to bed", I suggest her, lightly caressing her hairs. Her hairs feel smoother and silkier than before.
KaranIt has been 2 hours Divya left for her aunt's home. Mom said she will be back in two days. My leave will also end after 2 days. I have no other work except for sitting idle at home and watching a new web series. However, I'm not feeling like watching one.I'm strolling at our garden as it was feeling cold inside the room. Winter is almost here. I'm enjoying the light sun rays which are warming me at the same time reminding me of the golden complexion of Divya. It seems so weird that I'm thinking about her continuously for the last four days. No matter how much negative or positive my thoughts are, she is always there.Meanwhile, my chain of thoughts breaks with a call. I pick out my cellphone from my pocket and receive it.
Karan "Heck! What the heck are you doing here?", I blurt out in anger as soon as I discovered Divya in bridal attire. I can't believe that she is sitting on my bed in red bridal attire. Moreover, she is my wife. Is this happening to me? Nothing can't be worse than this that I'm married to her. I walked away from the bed, frustration clearly visible on my face. "What do you mean by that, Karan? I'm your wife. Am I not supposed be in your room?", she spits, sitting on the bed. My blood boils in anger, hearing her nonsense. "Just shut up", I scream. "Don't act like you didn't know anything?" "Karan, please don't yell like this. There's everyone around here", she says. "Let them hear. Let them hear that I was tricked. I was cheated on", I shrug, throwing my hands on the air.&nbs
KaranIt has been 2 hours Divya left for her aunt's home. Mom said she will be back in two days. My leave will also end after 2 days. I have no other work except for sitting idle at home and watching a new web series. However, I'm not feeling like watching one.I'm strolling at our garden as it was feeling cold inside the room. Winter is almost here. I'm enjoying the light sun rays which are warming me at the same time reminding me of the golden complexion of Divya. It seems so weird that I'm thinking about her continuously for the last four days. No matter how much negative or positive my thoughts are, she is always there.Meanwhile, my chain of thoughts breaks with a call. I pick out my cellphone from my pocket and receive it.
KaranShe tightens her grip around my torso. I can sense her calming down. She has stopped sobbing, resting herself in my arms as if she waited for this for a long time. Somewhere in mind, I also felt better after permitting her to come close to me. I wonder if it's the allowance for moving into a new life with her or just sympathy for her which I felt after witnessing her crying like this. "I love you, Karan", she moans into my arms, clasping my t-shirt tightly. I wish I could say that back to her. Every girl deserves to hear those three magical words from her husband. Yet, we don't count among those couples. "It's too late, let's go to bed", I suggest her, lightly caressing her hairs. Her hairs feel smoother and silkier than before.
KaranI feel something heavy on my heart as I recall Meera. Neither I know where she is now nor I know why she left me like this. It's been 6 months she didn't show up. I tried to find her in almost every possible places. But she was gone. I had imagined my whole life with her. A guy like me completely changed himself only for her. I became serious in studies and my career just to secure the future with her. I never knew she would ditch me like this. I had never expected this from the girl I loved the most in the world.I'm not sure when I started crying. As soon as a teardrop falls on my hand I realize that I was weeping. This happens almost every night. I dream of her and wake up with her voice. I can't sleep the whole night, thinking about her. Though nowadays I'm handling myself well, this marriage again cracked me up. When I was struggling to get over my recent
Karan "Divya, it's not the time to discuss all this", I finish wrapping the bandage and sigh. "Then when are we going to talk?", she wipes her tears and looks at me. Her eyes immediately get ruddy because of crying. "There's nothing to talk about. I'm just not ready to accept this marriage", driving my eyes away I push the plate towards her. "Finish your dinner now" "Then I'm ready to give us some time", she urges, looking at me, ignoring my last sentence. I don't look at her anymore since I know I know if I see her crying and suffering like this, I'll feel more guilty. "Say something", she touches my cheek. Her soft warm palm feels so cosy at this time when I'm exhausted. I wanted to tell her t
KaranFlashback continuesThe sun shone brighter in summer days. Her face shimmered as the sun rays hit her skin. She had flawless golden skin which looked more attractive in sunshine. We walked inside the building and reached our classroom. "Hey, Karan! What a surprise!", Mitali reacted as she found me early in the class. "Trying to be early", I grinned, looking at Divya who sat on the same seat like every day. She opened her book and turned pages, lifting her spectacle from her nose bone with her index finger. I realized I was noticing her more carefully from yesterday.There's a fact that when you target someone to impress you automatically start noticing them more.
KaranI had gotten more than 20 calls from mom. She was asking me to come back soon as everyone had their dinner but Divya is waiting for me. I didn't show any interest. In fact, I don't care if she's eating or not. I haven't told her to starve. Moreover, why can't Indian women have their dinner without their husbands? Is it because they actually care for their husbands or just to abide by a rule?Well, whatever it is I'm not gonna get trapped by her. If she's thinking by doing all this she can change my decision then it's completely her misconception and I can't help it.I look at the clock. It's near 10 pm. I guess now I can move to home. I'm feeling very exhausted and I badly need to sleep. But before that, I should have my dinner somewhere. I'm not gonna eat with her alone. It will freak me out.
KaranI walk out of the room and slam the door on her face. I mean the same what I told her. It's impossible for me to get back to her, in fact to anyone. She'll have to understand that I'm not the kind of person who will be compromising his whole life for the sake of family and society. I reach downstairs. We still have a bunch of relatives at my place that I can hardly find the door. "Karan!", dad stops me when I cross the hall. "Where are you going?" "Office, dad", I tell him. "Office!", mom exclaims as she joins dad for tea. "You're going to the office today?" "Yes, mom. It's urgent", I tell her. "But you had taken a leave of 7 days, no?", dad asks. "It's something urgent. I need to attend", I lie. I don't want to b
KaranEarly in the morning, the alarm clock rings. I struggle to open my eyes and rub my hands against them. Moving my hand forward I turn it off, half opening my eyes. I feel something on my body and immediately look behind, discovering Divya as she is hugging me from behind. I try to move her, part her away from me but my subconscious isn't ready to do that. How can a man on the earth resist a woman from being close to him? Her grip is tight enough, I can't drive her away as it can wake her up. Instead of doing that, I stare at her. Despite washing her face last night, her face has light spots of makeup which unnaturally looks good. My eyes move to her hand which was around my torso.I hear a tap on the door and come out of my thoughts. "Karan!", my mom knocks at the door. Divya moves a bit as the knock wakes her
KaranHer eyes moved from my eyes to my hand. She hesitated to shake hands with me. Divya was one of those girls in our college who was naive, shy and decent, every quality I wanted in a girl. Though most of my girlfriends were fucking bitches, that time I wanted to date someone for whom I would be the first guy she would fall in love with. I didn't wait long to offer her for friendship. "Yes or no?", I asked her as she was taking time to shake hands. "I'm already your friend, no?", she mumbled. "I don't wanna be a formal friend", I told her. "Now what's a formal friend?", she rolled her eyes. Some of her behaviours used to piss me off. I wondered how a girl could be so dumb. She thought we were friends. "This is called a formal friend