Chapter 4

Karan

I walk out of the room and slam the door on her face. I mean the same what I told her. It's impossible for me to get back to her, in fact to anyone. She'll have to understand that I'm not the kind of person who will be compromising his whole life for the sake of family and society. I reach downstairs. We still have a bunch of relatives at my place that I can hardly find the door.

   "Karan!", dad stops me when I cross the hall. "Where are you going?"

   "Office, dad", I tell him.

   "Office!", mom exclaims as she joins dad for tea. "You're going to the office today?"

   "Yes, mom. It's urgent", I tell her.

   "But you had taken a leave of 7 days, no?", dad asks. 

   "It's something urgent. I need to attend", I lie. I don't want to be around Divya. I'm trying my best to find ways so that she doesn't hamper my mind. 

   "What can be more urgent than your wedding?", mom rudely asks me.

   "But the wedding is over, no?", I am sounding stupid to utter this but I could only think of this excuse. 

   "Are you in senses, Karan? What kind of behaviour is this? Think about Divya at least. How will she feel? It's the first day of her marriage. And you're leaving?", mom continues to yell at me. I wish I could tell her the truth and I badly want to tell them I can't stay in this marriage. However, it's not the right time to discuss when half of my relatives are here.

   "Mom, I…", I can't complete before that someone interrupts me.

   "Let him go, maa", Divya's voice hit my ears as I look at her. She has worn the golden saree with matching simple jewellery and light make up.

   "What are you saying?", Dad finally speaks.

   "I don't have any problem with it", she looks at me and smiles. "Work is important and I'm here now. For whole life", she glances at me. Whole life? Here I'm planning for a divorce and she is planning about whole life. Well, it'll hurt her expectations. Nothing else. I glare at her and look away.

  "Fine. If she has no problem, we can't oppose. But make sure you come home early", mom tells me.

  "Sure, mom", I gaze at her for a few seconds and leave for the office.

Office

When I enter the office everyone looks at me so weirdly as if they have witnessed an alien. I keep walking towards my desk as I hear a few of them congratulating me. I just shake my head.

   "Karan? You've come today?", Danny snaps from his desk as I pass him. 

   "Weren't you on leave?", Seema exclaims.

   "Come on, guys. Focus on your work. Not on him", Parthiv shuts them off and comes to my desk. We work together in the office also.

I pull out my files and turn pages, confused about what I should do.

   "Pissed?", Parthiv asks, sitting in front of me.

   "A lot", I rub my forehead.

   "I was shocked too. I can understand what your reaction would be", he sighs.

   "Terrible", I shrug.

   "What about Divya? How's she doing?", he asks. He is the only one in my office who knew about me and Divya as we were in the same college.

   "She is fucking good. But I am not. Can you believe she knew that she was getting married to me?", I blurt out.

   "That's not shocking. Everyone knows whom they are gonna get married to unless the person is you", he taunts me. "How can you be so stupid? Why didn't you try to know anything?"

   "I never imagined it would be her. And you know I had no interest left"

   "But now it's causing shit in your life", he tells me.

   "I know. That's why I offered her for divorce but she is completely in the opposite direction. She wants to work on this marriage but I know this marriage can never work", I vent my frustration.

   "How can you be so sure that this marriage won't work?", he raises his eyebrows.

   "Because she is my ex", I can only answer this.

   "This is not a reason", he throws me a blank look.

   "For me, it's a big reason", I scoff, dumping those files aside.

   "I know you are depressed because of back to back shocks. But you need to overcome it", he stands up and pats my back. I can only shake my head this moment. 

   "Anyway, I have a lot of work to do. See you later", he leaves. 

I had no work pending since I had completed everything two  daya back before taking the leave. I idly sit on my chair and close my eyes. 

Flashback

After Divya's approval for friendship, it had been easy for me to contact her any time without any urgent work. That night, I was stalking her account. She was in my friend list for one year but I never paid much attention to her. Her account barely had ten pics of hers. Every pic was sweet, simple and modest. There were many common things in every picture; she had worn her thick-framed spectacles, breading her hairs tightly, wearing long Kurti with palazzo or denim jeans with colourful stoles. She hardly got 5-6 reacts on her every picture. Maybe she hadn't added unknown people in her friend list. After hesitating for a long time, I finally managed to send her a message.

On Chat

I: Hi, Divya.

Her active status wasn't visible. I waited for a few minutes and regretted messaging her when no single message hit my inbox. I was about to close it. Right then.

She: Hey, Karan.

I smiled at the screen and immediately typed back.

I: what's up? h8 ur dinner?

She: Sorry! I didn't get you.

I: I asked if you had your dinner.

She: oh! Yeah, just now.

I: g8 

I typed, thinking about what I should say next.

She: Why are you so obsessed with short forms? 

Her message popped on the screen as I got relaxed. Now, this was some topic which could last longer. At least, I wouldn't need to create a topic.

I: I'm used to it. Habit! 

She: Very bad habit. You should change it. If you don't change it right now, it'll cause you trouble.

I: How?

She: After graduation, you'll be applying for jobs. If you keep typing like this, you won't be able to type anything formal for work.

I: I have a lot of time for that.

She: Lot of time? You're so immature, Karan.

I: and why is that?

She: For you, there's a lot of time. But there is not! Man can never have a lot of time.

I: I understood, our lady saint.

She sent me some laughing emojis.

She: Anyway, why did you message me?

I: Can't I message you without a purpose? Did you forget we are friends now and friends never need a purpose to talk?

She: haha. I know. But it's too late. I am going to sleep.

I: isn't it so soon? I mean classes start at 10.

She: No. I need to wake up early as travelling by bus eats up a lot of time on the road.

I: you don't need to worry about that. Should I pick you?

I got no reply from her, though she had seen it.

I: what happened? Tell me.

She: You will pick me?

I: Why not? Our homes are on the same route. 

She: But still it's not needed.

I: Divya, I insist, please.

She: ok fine. 

I was on clouds after hearing this. She could never resist me.

I: then I'll pick you at 9:30.

She: Sure, Goodnight.

I: Goodnight.

Chat closed.

I was excited for the next day. Finally, I had gotten the first bike date of my college life. And also I could realize that she is very easy to pacify. I wished I could impress her too and make my girlfriend soon. I dozed off thinking about the next day.

Flashback ends

Now At the age of 25, I'm realizing what a big fool I was. Dating, girls, relationships were everything to me. But these 3 things have made my life hell now.

I open my eyes and distract myself from the thoughts of Divya. If I want to stay away from her thoughts, I will need to work. 

The office room starts being empty as all the employees were leaving for home one by one. But I am not in a mood to go home today.

   "Hey, Karan. Aren't you going?", Ivan asks me, cleaning his desk.

   "I'll be going. I have some work left so…", I mumble.

   "What bro! After a day of own wedding? Go home. Do that tomorrow. Your wife must be waiting", he leaves after telling me all this. But fuck! I don't give damn to her. She is very excited to be my wife, right? now let her wait like a sweet wife, I shrug into my mind.