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Love After Loss
Love After Loss
Author: April

Chapter 1

Author: April
It was drizzling when I headed to the infirmary.

Allison Payne, the healer, was a kind-looking, middle-aged woman. As she glanced at the results on the computer, her expression softened with sympathy.

"Sherry," she said gently. "Based on this, I recommend you be admitted for a marrow purification treatment."

I pressed my lips together and said nothing.

She patted my hand and continued, "It's okay if you don't want to. It's an aggressive treatment, and honestly, it's really painful. I'll prescribe something to you to manage the wolfsbane fever instead.

"Just keep in mind, the onset of the fever is closely tied to your emotional state. The more depressed you get, the deeper the poisoning runs. That's when the self-harming starts. Your real issue seems to be with your family. If it's possible, you should talk to them."

Talk to them? They didn't even like talking to me.

I twisted my fingers together instinctively. The skin felt rough as it was covered in old scars.

Just as I was about to leave, Allison glanced at me and added, "I remember your fated mate. He's always been so loving. He stuck with you through every treatment, didn't he? Love and support are the best medicine. Spend more time with him. That could help you heal too."

But Allison didn't know that my fated mate didn't seem to want to stay by my side anymore.

Samuel Carver and I had been in love for a year, and I had been claimed as his mate for three months now.

Two years ago, I missed calls from my sister, Cherry Nicholson. She took her own life that same night.

Mom screamed that I was a murderer. She threw things at me—plates, shoes, anything she could get her hands on. When she got tired of throwing, she used her fists instead.

Her voice still haunted me, like a curse carved into my memory. "It should've been you, not her."

That same year, I was diagnosed with wolfsbane fever, and I broke down sobbing by the side of the road.

People stared, whispered, then walked right past me like I didn't exist.

Only Samuel stood in front of me with an umbrella and handed me a clean handkerchief. Smiling, he said, "A face this pretty shouldn't be crying."

I snapped out of the memory and grabbed my phone to call Samuel repeatedly.

He didn't answer.

The automated voice on the other end kept repeating the same message, drilling into my nerves.

Eventually, I hung up and dragged myself home.

When I reached home, I noticed that the front door was wide open.

I thought maybe Samuel had come back. I was about to call out his name, but the words died in my throat.

The place was a mess, and everything was knocked over.

I froze, about to call the enforcers, when I saw someone coming down the stairs.

It was Mom, whom I hadn't seen in a long time. She was holding a photo frame that looked all too familiar in her hands.

There was a flicker of something in her eyes when she saw me, then she raised her arms and hurled the frame straight at me.

It hit the floor, and the glass shattered at my feet.

When she saw I wasn't hurt, she lunged at me, grabbed my hair, and began punching.

Her face twisted with rage. She kept repeating in a frantic, broken voice, "You think you deserve a bonding ceremony with someone you love? You? You killed Cherry with your own hands!

"You should rot in hell. You don't deserve to be happy! Why? Why wasn't it you who died?"

I didn't dare fight back. I just covered my head and let her rage. Every cruel word hit like a blade, sinking deep into my chest.

The crushing weight of despair was almost unbearable. I clutched my ears, whispering to myself that I couldn't die. I promised Cherry.

I didn't know how long the blows kept coming, but eventually, a maid rushed in and pulled her off me.

The maid kneeled beside me and asked if I was okay.

That was when I finally blinked back to the present. With trembling hands, I dug through my bag for my medicine.

However, I couldn't find it.

Just then, a pair of polished leather shoes stepped into my vision.

Cold liquid splashed over my head, soaking my hair and running down my face before hitting the floor with a soft patter.

I froze and looked up.

Samuel looked down at me, holding the empty vial in his hand. His smile was cold and cruel as he looked at me.

"Lick it," he demanded.
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  • Love After Loss   Chapter 10

    Samuel was the one who had pieced the photo back together.He had pieced it together again and again, only to pull it apart each time, as if he never got tired of the cycle.In the photo, I was smiling brightly. But since the day we met, I rarely smiled like that. There was always a fog that never cleared between my brows.And back then, he had told himself he would help me chase it away because I really was beautiful when I smiled.When Samuel found out the truth, he told himself that he should hate me.But there was a split second of hesitation. It was that hesitation that made him feel ashamed. It felt like he was betraying Cherry.So he kept convincing himself that he had to hate me. He repeated it to himself until it calcified into truth.And then, he began to treat me cruelly. He told me to die, again and again.I never got angry, and I never fought back.But deep down, he knew that I was only hurting more than he was.He had seen me duck into corners to take my medicin

  • Love After Loss   Chapter 9

    I received news about Mom two weeks later.That day, I had brought Cherry's box with me to her favorite place—a field full of blooming flowers and fresh herbs.When I returned, I found out that Mom had lost her mind.I went to the infirmary to see her.Her hair was a tangled mess from yanking it out herself. She cried and laughed all at once. She would tell everyone she had two daughters—one gentle, and one lively.But as she spoke, she broke down again, sobbing uncontrollably. She kept saying she had ruined them both.While clawing at her hair, she hit herself over and over.I watched for a while in silence before leaving.After that, I resumed visiting Allison, the healer who specialized in treating wolfsbane fever. I went to her on a regular schedule again for a proper, science-backed treatment.I always went alone.Allison smiled at her monitor before turning to me. She said I looked better lately.I smiled back.She gently took my hand and gave it a light pat. "Sherry,

  • Love After Loss   Chapter 8

    When I opened the door, Samuel was slumped on the couch like a wreck. The room reeked of alcohol, and the table was littered with overturned bottles.The moment he saw me, his eyes lit up. His voice was thick with disbelief as he called out to me, "Cherry, is that you?"When I didn't move, he lunged toward me and pulled me into a crushing embrace. He held me so tightly it was as if he wanted to fuse me into his bones."Thank God, Cherry. Thank God," he kept repeating it beside my ear."I'm sorry, Cherry. I was wrong."The once-proud Alpha now bowed before me, his back hunched low. His head rested on the curve of my shoulder.I struggled, trying to push him away, but he only held me tighter.I opened my mouth to curse him out, but I froze.A warm liquid slid down into my collar, trailing from my neck downward."Cherry…"Samuel struggled to suppress his trembling. His voice grew quieter with every word. "I thought… I thought I really lost you."Just as I was about to say somet

  • Love After Loss   Chapter 7

    Mike dropped me off at an empty house and left me his number before he left.He said, "I don't know everything you've been through, but if you ever need help, you can call me."I nodded.The moment I turned my phone back on to save his number, the screen lit up with a storm of missed calls.Samuel and Mom had bombarded me with calls, one after another, as if they had coordinated it in advance.I saved Mike's number and shut the phone off again before tossing it aside.There was a thick journal inside Cherry's box. I sat at the desk, lit a lamp, and began to read.It was thick enough to take me four days to finish. And yet, it felt so thin because this one book held the entirety of Cherry's short life.Cherry and I were both raised by Mom, who had an overwhelming need for control.Our childhood was never warm. It was filled with shouting, punishments, and emotional cruelty.In that dark, inescapable time, Cherry and I were each other's only light. So it made sense that she had

  • Love After Loss   Chapter 6

    After parking my car at the gates of the cemetery, I gripped the silver dagger and stepped onto the stone path leading up the hill without hesitation.The photo on the tombstone was silent and colorless.I used to never dare look at her for more than a second, always passing by in a hurry. But not tonight.Under the moonlight, the dagger in my hand glinted with a cold, metallic sheen.I didn't hesitate.The first cut landed on the thinnest skin of my wrist.The second traced the faint blue vein beneath.The third, I aimed at my chest.Bright red blood dripped onto the stone slabs, drip by drip. It reminded me of the wine spilled on the day Samuel and Jill dined together.Now, perhaps on the verge of death, I felt an unexpected calm. Even my heart didn't ache anymore.Suddenly, a loud smack jolted me.Before I could react, a tall man wrestled the dagger from my grip and kicked it aside.His eyes landed on my face. He froze for a second, then his gaze dropped to my bleeding w

  • Love After Loss   Chapter 5

    The car sped down the road, but the face in that photo kept flashing through my mind.I had almost forgotten. Cherry was once so vibrant and so beautiful.But in the end, all I could remember was the hollow look in her eyes that day and the way she lay there, covered in blood, disheveled and broken.The blood beneath her had long since dried.There was so much blood. I tried to wipe it off Cherry with a handkerchief. It soaked through, and still, I couldn't get her clean.How could a person bleed so much?My white shirt was stained bright red, yet Cherry's face was as pale as snow.The weight of grief crushed me. I dropped to my knees, unaware Mom was charging at me with a savage expression.Not even the patrolling officers could stop her.She yanked my hair hard until my scalp burned. Then her relentless and brutal blows came."Why didn't you answer her calls? She called nine times! And you didn't pick up once! You killed her!"Her angry roar crashed down like a boulder tum

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