I rummage through my drawers and grab out the first pair of panties and bra I find. I grab a t-shirt and a pair of sweats and I dress in record time, only half-dried off, and with my hair still dripping wet. CeCe moves out of my doorway as she knows I’m a woman on a mission. I can’t leave this house without seeing my son. When my world feels like it’s going to hell, Gauge anchors me and makes things make sense, reminds me of my reasons to face another day and go on. And now, moon willing, I’ll also have my mate as another reason to keep standing when everything around me falls apart.I walk into my baby’s room as quietly as I can. His cherub face glows in the moon shaped nightlight, his lips adorably puckered against the crib mattress, his little tush up in the air, his chunky legs tucked under him. He has favored this peculiar way of sleeping for as long as I can remember. One of his arms is draped over his firetruck pillow. My heart instantly softens at the sight of my cub, sleepin
When we reach the clearing on our packlands, River shifts back into his human skin. I do the same because I want to face my mate again when I can hold her in my arms. When I can use my words to tell her all the things I’ve been holding back for the past ten years we’ve been apart. Beg forgiveness at her feet. My ribs ache, every part of me hurts, and I would probably fall over if my cousin wasn’t holding me up, but still, I must get to her and nothing else matters.I lift my nose to the wind to try and catch the path her most recent scent leads. Her scent is imprinted in the air, on the very land it seems, my mate is very much a part of my pack, and I can’t fucking get enough of her divine smell. It’s intoxicating, and I’m already addicted. How had I ever left her? What in the moon was wrong with me when I fled all those years ago? Will she take me back? I will spend the rest of my life making it up to her if Sloane will allow me the privilege and honor.But she has already found ano
I want my mate happy and whole, but the selfish, possessive part of me, wants her happy and whole by my side and not find comfort or love with another wolf. Her fingertips graze my skin butterfly soft at first, testing the waters. Still, I shiver. Fuck, if my mate keeps touching me like this, especially so close to my cock, everyone in the room will know I’m turned on. There will be no hiding, my hard, naked dick from their eyes. I force myself to keep my eyes open and not moan as she spreads the salve beneath my navel, then follows the line of my hip bones. Then up my abs and my chest liberally. Back down south again to make sure she hasn’t missed a spot. I imagine the feel of those soft, pretty hands of hers much lower. Pumping my cock in her silk touch. I’m going to get erect with a fucking audience and I try and think of something to turn me off. Anything to distract myself from my mate’s wandering fingers, especially now that my pain is being dulled as the pain meds kick in.
It starts to drizzle as I make my way home. The warm rain mixes with my tears. My head is a jumbled mess of feelings, of warring emotions. Part of me wants to turn around and run back to my mate and never leave his side again. To tell him I’ve always loved him and I forgive him. To be together. I feel the intense rush of love for Slade, even now. But the other part of me is mad as hell and hurt beyond belief. And right now, that side is winning. Because my mate doesn’t want me. And he never did. And he never will.All these years I loved him, but he doesn’t feel the same. This mate bond was forced upon him unwillingly, and he doesn’t accept it. I accepted it long before I even fully understood it, I dreamed of my wolf, I loved him from afar, and when I saw him again, it all clicked and fell into place for me. Things felt right and made sense for the first time in a long time. But my mate left his home, his family, his whole damn life, to stay away from me for ten long years. Slade w
My sister grips the side of the tub and let’s out an exasperated sigh. I can’t help but smile.“You just really want to go into town today, don’t you?” I challenge her.Our original plans for today before I ran over Slade, was to hit Portland for a day of shopping and taking the cubs to an indoor play gym. River, Willow, Phoenix, and Celeste were all willing companions for today’s excursions, while Clay took more convincing. Little Nyx sealed the deal when he told the man-cub there was a foam pit where we were going. The pack won’t let she-wolfs leave the safety of Shadow Ridge without male escorts. I understand this rule is necessary as hunters often target them. Celeste was cleared to leave pack lands chaperoned within a year of her first shift at the age of twelve, because my sister learned remarkable control over her wolf early on. Many pubescent wolves are often grounded to pack lands for two to three years in their most volatile times, after their first merges until they maste
Needless to say, it isn’t easy to get any sleep in the healing cabin. Not just because I’m in pain, the cot beneath me is harder than the forest bed, but I can’t stop thinking about my mate. That look in Sloane’s eye when she accused me of denying the mating bond because she isn’t good enough, the tears I saw there. I hurt her badly though I never meant too. The guilt is fucking eating me from the inside out. Worst of all, there is some truth in her words. Much truth.But if anything, I’m the one who isn’t good enough for her. And now I don’t know how to make things right. I’m not sure my mate will ever forgive me and accept our bond. She was right to walk away. My pride has cost me nearly everything. The pain medications numb the bond, but it still hurts like hell. Because I already know the things my mate is feeling. Olive busies herself with tasks around the cabin. She checks up on me frequently and watches me with keen eyes. Though she doesn’t say much. The silence is thick. And
It’s hard to get some privacy not just living with a toddler, but also with a wolf pack. Nudity is not something that wolves give much thought too, it’s natural to them, so they have some issues with personal boundaries when it comes to being naked. Also, with their superior sense of smell, it’s hard to hide things from them which really sucks at times. They’ll know when someone is on their period, pregnant before the mother physically shows, when a she-wolf is in heat (thank God I’m excluded from that), can smell many sicknesses and diseases, when someone is turned on, or very strong emotions that trigger the release of hormones such as adrenalin, testosterone, or oxytocin. Wolves are like, living, breathing lie detector tests and private investigators rolled into one.So, my best friend Lark gives little thought to entering my bathroom while I’m still marinating in the tub. I lost most of my dignity and modesty a while ago. I still remember the first time a member of the pack other
I finish up lunch, and Lark volunteers to drop it off to Slade. I’m a bit anxious sending her near my mate and sharp objects. But I’m not ready to face him again just yet. Lark hasn’t seen her cousin in ten years so I’m sure they have some things to catch up on. Slade grew up nice, I’ll give that bastard that much credit. I’m glad he traded those brown spikes in for a sexy fade cut and the perfect amount of stubble along his sculpted jaw line, and those green eyes of his only got more bedroom worthy with time. Being his mate would be hard enough because the man looks like a fucking underwear model. And I look like a girl trying to play grown up, at times I feel like such an imposter in more ways than one.After lunch I force down, I have some cuddles with my baby while CeCe texts her friends and takes over the living room TV to watch bad reality shows. She gets a hold of Willow and River, and despite the events of last night, they decide to continue with our original plans, though la