I was washing a load dishes after Lady Tracy's friends had taken their leave. They held a book club every month and took turns hosting at each others houses. This month was Lady Tracy's turn.
"Your room wreaks of a male whiff." She said out of the blue. When had she even gone down there? I couldn't open the windows so I knew she was right. Anyone who knew the smell that was produced when male and female genitalia entertwined knew well enough that it didn't go away in just a few seconds. I had learnt that the hard way over these past couple of months. It required a lot of baths.
"Are you bringing men into my home?" Lady Tracy scowled. She looked very angry. I had no way of answering this, I could not tell her that her husband came in every night or sometimes twice per week, it all depended on his schedule or if Lady Tracy was asleep or out.
"No, Ma'am."
My answered seemed to aggravate her. She immediately slapped me, it stung because she wore her wedding ring and it would surely leave a mark but the advantage of being dark skinned was that it would fade within the next minute.
"Are you calling me a liar then?"
I kept quiet.She didn't hesitate hitting me again. Lady Tracy took the dish towel near the sink and continuously hit me. It was painful because it was wet. It hurt because she put so much effort on my face. To get through it, I bit on my lip. It became swollen. I don't think it was a mistake when she aimed my for eye, twice.
"I will not stop until you tell your truth?!"
My cheeks had swollen up, my eye looked battered up. It was red and slowing closing. If I didn't admit to it then she wouldn't stop—
"I am, yes, I am!" I yelled.
"Who is he?"
"Elliot owned by the Cunningham family. He wishes to marry me." I said the last part because I already felt like a harlot and I did not want to be seen that way or to feel that way. It was a disgrace.
"You should invite him over for supper on Sunday then?"
My heart immediately started to thud faster.
"He might be working, Lady Tracy!"
"Well tell him to ask for a day off. It must be hard not seeing your fiancée for a while. No wonder you get at it whenever you do meet." She smirked.
I faked a smile."Well, I hope you don't plan on leaving us after you marry"
"Actually Lady Tracy, I have been meaning to speak to you about something."
"Tell me already!"
"I really appreciate all that you have done for me. Your kindness, you clothe me, giving me a roof to stay under and I never sleep hungry."
Lady Tracy smiled.
She loved compliments.I had to keep them coming."I have learnt so much from you. I love seeing your latest fashion. You inspire me to want to be beautiful. You're such an inspiration.." Honestly I could care less. She only ever bought me oversized dresses. I didn't mind, I loved covering up. It's the thought that counts and I know other slaves must have had it worse.
"Arghh you flatter me too much Nashe!"
"I'm just being honesty, Lady Tracy.."
"Then what's the problem?" She questioned.
"I miss my family, I would like to work in the field, I'd like to go back."
"But you visit them every Sunday after church..."
"Yes... but..."
"I will be sure to speak to William about this."
"Thank—"
"Speak to me about what?"
"Nashe would like to go back to her family and work in the fields."
I looked down immediately not because my face was swollen and I probably looked much scarier but because after what happened last night. I couldn't look him in the eye.—I was reading the Bible. I always did before I slept. I liked reading, anything. Ever since Master William had kissed me, I hoped he would not come back again but just to be on a safer side, I had trimmed my pubic hair. I hated doing it with a razor.. it didn't make it feel any better but I had mastered a way of doing it. I hoped he was nauseated. I checked the clock, it was nearing ten pm. Master William abruptly entered my room. His eyes scanned me from head to toe."Evening, Master William." I whispered anxiously. I immediately faced the other side and started unbuttoning my dress letting it drag down to my knees. Master william would always snap at me that I took too much time, which wasted his time.
"I want to take it off you" He said stepping closer.
He did.
His fingers traced the stretch marks on my breasts and my hips. It gave me a tingling feeling. I didn't like this, couldn't we just go back to doing it the way we used to. I was on the verge of losing my mind. I laid back on my small bed and waited for him. I looked aside since I wasn't allowed to watch him undress.
He hovered over my body, in between my thighs. His chest was broad and chiseled but I didn't allow myself to look any further. I busied myself by looking at the brick wall beside me.
"I want you to touch me." He demanded, bringing my chin to face him. He was so close, and it made me nervous.
"Master—"
This seemed to aggravate him.
He took my small hand and made me reach for his girth. I became beyond petrified. I could feel the veins and how rigid it was. There was a myth that white men were quite small, if this was small then how big were black men.. this wasn't small at all, my hand couldn't even go around it."That's how much I have been wanting you throughout the day!" He said in a constrained voice.
I didn't say anything.I didn't wasnt to seem rude but-"Master William, I'm supposed to go to the market early in the morning and I would appreciate if we.."
His eyes only stared down at mine then lowered to my lips.Oh no please!
He placed a wet somber kiss on my lips and whispered. "... I love it when you play innocent"
I remained silent.
He kissed me again, this time biting on my lower lip. He tasted like mint. I didn't kiss him back, I didn't know how to.. I didn't want to disappoint him either. After a while though, I eventually started moving my lips with his. His fingers started rubbing in between my flower and I was terrified stiff at the feeling. My nipples hardened against his chest as he slipped his middle finger inside me, causing my thighs to slightly shake.
It was a foreign feeling especially with his lips on my mine. He moved to nibbling at my nipples. I let out a sound, I couldn't have been more embarrassed. What was wrong with me! He rubbed his member on my clit until it soaked and pushed into my opening. I let out another sound. I was embarrassed, he only smirked.
"Nothing can be heard from the basement.. you can moan as you please." He added. "Wrap your arms around my neck."
I did as I was told.
He laid his lips back onto mine again and committed damnation on my body. Feeling him going in and out only to slam back into me felt like torture. He filled me up to the point that I felt I couldn't take anymore. If I did.. he would rip me apart. It worried me, if he left me damaged, I would really have nothing to offer. He was on a mission to ruin me.
He put his hands under my butt squeezing it lightly so he could hit harder. I whimpered, I was close to crying, I had never felt this way before. His tongue swirled in my mouth, his teeth biting lips. I shuddered—
My thighs shook as I felt the most relaxing yet satisfying feeling. I didn't know that could happen. I assumed sex was only to bare fruit of the womb and satisfaction for the male. I never thought I could feel this way!
I opened my eyes only to find him watching me. I immediately removed my arms and looked away. Guilt was all I felt, I was sleeping with a married man and I didn't feel the least guilty about it. He pulled out and released his load on my stomach."I will go pee then we can do it again."
I didn't understand why he was talking to me... he must have noticed my confusion as he further explained that he needed to pee so that he could remove any remaining sperm from his last ejaculation, that way he could come and give it to me again.For the first time I was excited.
I didn't talk much or add anything to the conversation. I didn't want to say anything wrong.He came back and we did it again.
I didn't know what time he left because I woke up disoriented and sore.—
"What happened to your face?" He questioned. Lady Tracy gave me a threatening look."I think I'm having an allergic reaction to something I may have eaten."
He didn't seem convinced.
"You ought to appreciate us taking you in and here you're wishing to return to the plantations... Are you mental?""I also found out she has been sneaking a man in her room." Lady Tracy added. "She admitted that it was her fiancé who came to visit her."
Master William cleared his throat."She doesn't have a fiancé!"
"William, she does and they plan to marry soon." They chattered amongst themselves as if I wasn't there.
"Pathetic.. who would want to marry her of all people!" I was expecting it.
"William.." Lady Tracy bellowed."You know that I had specifically asked for her to work for us because I was well aware that she is the most hideous and you agreed, saying she must not have had many proposals so she would work for us for years."
It hurt but I was used to it.
"I only agreed because I knew there was no way in hell she would seduce you looking like burned charcoal but someone wants to marry her and we can't take that away from her." Lady Tracy replied.
At this point, I knew I had to leave.
Not just leave the kitchen but leave. I needed to accept Elliot's proposal, I never wanted to see Master William again."Master William was here, yesterday." My dear mother said with a gentle smile. I did not wish to speak of him. I just sighed.."What's wrong Nashe?""I want to go back home.." I immediately burst out crying. I had been holding it in for so long that being with my mother.. just made me show my vulnerability out in the open."It's not easy out here in the field, my child." She rubbing soft circles behind my back. I knew why she was happy for me... My two brothers had been sold off when they were only sixteen and we hadn't seen them in over eight years. That hurt my mother deeply, we had no communication with them.. infact we did not know if they were still with the living."I know but—""No but's, this is what's best for you. I had to serve Master William's father and it did me good. My husband was treated better and so were my kids. Well atleast a tad bit better.."I was absolutely taken aback but then it all made sense how my mother had to spend the night else where and—My brothers!
Forget when I said I had it good.Just think of it no more.I nursed the bruises on my face, mainly under my eye. I dare say, as it may be, I deserved it. Master William's had visitors, they had supper here. Upon my serving... the seemingly old aged man grabbed my behind making me lose my grip on the tray I was holding. It all went daubing all over him and his wife. I didn't do it calculatedly, I swear I didn't. I was startled, this had happened so many times to me in my life but I still managed to be startled. It was never something I would get used to.The man continuously said that my owners didn't discipline me enough and that I was a little ungrateful floozy. He also kept talking about my body. He said it was my fault that I wore a dress that outline my behind like that. I did not own any tight fitting clothes, I did not understand what he wanted me to wear. I did not respond as I cleaned up the mess. As soon as I was done, Master William stared at me with so much vile anger. Lady
Lady Tracy was a dressmaker. She worked from home, she had a room where she did everything required. Master William also had his own office. There were two guest bedrooms and yet I still slept in the basement. Sometimes.. I thought Master William wanted me in the basement because of the things.. he wanted to do to me. These words kept ringing in my head.. 'Nothing can be heard from the basement.. you can moan as you please.'My name was called.I hurriedly went to the dining room where I met Elliot. He was smartly dressed in black worn out slacks and a brown dress shirt. His black 4c hair was smartly combed. He gave me a clean white smile. His teeth were so white, they were the highlight from his dark skin. He was a tad bit lighter than myself though."You could chat a little while I go fetch Mrs. Cunningham's possessions." Lady Tracy said with a hint of amusement. "Just don't do what I wouldn't." She warned.I panicked, what if she told him that she thought we were having sexual rela
Just when I was beginning to think, I was off the hook and he wasn't coming. I heard foot steps, steady as to not make any sound. The door slowly closed. I turned to look at him. He intimidated me."Don't call me Master William, it disgusts me." He said immediately cutting me off. You disgust me! I said to myself."Call me Will." He paused. "You make me feel like a bad person which I'm not." He took slow steps approaching me. I did not wish to this close to him. To call him by his name, no!"She will kill me." I finally said. "Is that what you want? You can beat me to a pulp for saying what I'm about to say but I don't care. I will gladly take it. I don't mind dying in fact I really want to die so badly and you would be doing me a favor."He seemed amused, he gave me a smirk. I looked away. I hate this man."I like this rebellious side of you. I was starting to think you're dim-witted.""She won't kill you." He added when I remained unwaveringly quiet."If you love her why are you doi
"You never touch me, William." I heard Lady Tracy whining. The door was closed but as I cleaned the passage, I could hear. "I'm a woman, I'm your wife.. I need to be touched. Liam is five, we ought to give him a sibling already.""I will not be having kids like we're breeding chickens. Liam is enough." Master William arrogantly yelled back. I could tell he was aggravated. I could also tell that his wife was desperate."We said we would have five kids and I'm best fertile now. We planned on a big family remember? Now whenever you're with me... you never cum or you claim to be tired then roll over. Is something wrong? Would you like to see a doctor.""Woman, don't disrespect me like that! It's not my fault you're as stretched out as a rubber band.""Wi..lliam!" Lady Tracy gasped clearly shocked. I felt awful for her. I couldn't wait to be stretched out.. maybe he would leave me alone."I gave you a son." She said in a quivering voice."Yes, I'm grateful for that!""No, you aren't if you
He ignored me.Not just for a day or two but for a week. I should be happy right? I'm not not happy. He didn't talk to me. He didn't laugh with me. He didn't share crude remarks with me. He acted mutual, like he didn't care if I was there or not. I probably sound stupid for trying to get his attention. I would always expect him to say something when we were alone but he did not, he would dismiss and tell me to close the door behind me. I do not know what I did. Before I went to sleep, I replayed everything I said that day. Did I say something wrong? I probably did. Maybe I came off as rude, I just did not understand why he had suddenly become distant.It all made sense when I saw her.I was replaced.Long curly bouncy hair, green eyes and a lighter skin tone. She was obviously the result of an... unwanted affair. She was much more appealing."This is my half sister.. Mary. She will be staying with us for a bit. She will help out around the house.." Lady Tracy informed me.Half sister?
Mr. Durham had his fiftieth birthday celebration. It was a milestone achievement into old age for someone with so much wealth and over seven children with different mothers. It wasn't anything new. I was—Obviously not very not invited.I knew how those always events planned out, I used to help serve every time there was an event at the Gallagher household. People would arrive extravagantly dressed up and powder faced. Socialize for a bit, more like comparing wealth and achievements. They would then gather around the piano for entertainment. Playing piano pieces composed by Oliver Shaw, Thomas Moore. Most of the time they just repeated the same songs like "Coming through the Rye," "Annie Laurie," "Old Dan Tucker" and "Oh, Susannah."... I had them all memorized by head.After their piano sessions they would eat because what's a party without a big meal. They would socialize and simultaneously find slaves to make a banter about or look for a slave to be angry at. The theme never got old
"Jesus christ! What are you doing here..?! Quickly away from me." These were the sour words I woke up to. "For goodness sake get dressed." He hissed looking away from me. I was hurt... but I was expecting it. The alcohol must have worn off."What happened?" He questioned, then immediately answered himself before I could form an answer. "You most probably took advantage of me. You're shameless!"I didn't mind, he had thrown much worse insults at me before. Insults more lethal than this. I looked at the watch at the corner of the room, it was currently five am. Lady Tracy, Mary and Liam would be back soon. I should forget last night ever happened. When I was about to leave he pulled me against his chest."My wife shouldn't know." He said. "I was very drunk. I most probably said things, I didn't mean. Don't let them get to your head."I only nodded, before he let me go.—It didn't take an hour before they were back. They were all seated having breakfast. Lady Tracy was telling her husba