RILEYEver heard of the saying that what you fear, taunts you. And as it taunts you, from just your imagination, slowly, without you even realizing it, you breathe life into that fear and it becomes reality.I know this is not how it’s said, but my brain settles with understanding it this way.This happens to me.My fears have become reality.One day passed. Understandable .Two days. I’m still waiting.Now three whole days.And no sign of my husband. I have, earnestly waited for his return. Prayed that he is safe. Hoped that he has all thing under control. Wished to be in his arms every night.These, I have been doing for two full weeks.It’s been three whole days and the only place I am given the liberty to see my husband in in my dreams. In my very lengthy dreams, as all I do these days is wait and sleep.In there, he is more handsome, calmer, speak to me softly, holds me tenderly, looks into my eyes regularly and kisses me very often, in a world where only two of us exist.But in
RILEYMy fear continues to manifest.Three days turned into a week, with no word or sight of the love of my life.Slowly, the days have blended into one week. And one week into two.Two weeks of my boredom intensifying and leaving me with the most terrible imaginations of what could have befallen Jude. As often as it comes, I try to cleanse it with positive thoughts.But the bad thoughts won’t just go away.It has someway gotten into my dreams, so that I no longer see Jude and I in rosy, sunshine filled places, where the sun shone very bright and the wind blew very low. No. I now see myself in tight rubber jumpsuits, as a warrior. Always the same costume. And my mission in those dreams are always the same.There is no one giving me this mission, but I see myself going to rescue Jude from all manner of dangerous places.From a fire filled bottomless pit, inhabited by big scary looking dragons. From dark dry desert, where I have to combat with huge dinosaurs that had large noses. From
RILEY I have never been materialistic, or moved by materials, as I don’t remember owning or receiving gifts from anyone. I can also vividly remember that it was in a bid to get me a gift that my Pa ended up the way he ended up. So this overwhelming joy I feel as the pendant hang around my neck, is totally foreign to me. There is a permanent smile plastered on my face as I continuously look down to check if it’s real and not just a play out of my imagination. Beta Stephen is saying something to the crowd, I know. What he is saying, I don’t know. Is this how everybody feels on Winter nights? No wonder the happiness written all over their faces, both Young and old, as they try tone it down and concentrate on listening to Beta Stephen. I don’t blame them. I am not listening too. After getting the information from Gerald that this beautiful thing hanging around my neck is my Winter gift from Jude, my husband, I had grabbed the box, and read a deeper meaning of love and consideratio
wake up with a start.There is sweat running down my back and I can as well feel goosebumps rising on my legs. I feel weak and it takes me a moment to realize where I am.The kitchen, of course.A ragged sigh leave my chest as I fold back into my resting place.I had vomited a lot today. There had been two very pregnant womene up for delivery and they had fallen into labour almost simultaneously. Being that the midwife could only focus her acre and attention on one, we had to split into group. Cleaning the woman’s sweat was my own duty, as they were fully aware of what a disaster it would be if I was involved with the bloody part of the business.Seeing the woman’s face had given me a whirlwind of emotions, as whike I try to be stong and focus on inanimate objects in the room, the woman wouldn’t just stop wailing.Moved by the ferocity of her screams, I had once barked at the midwife, which I was oaired with, to hasten up. My shout had made the room go sklent. Even the women kept qui
RILEY Nothing, apart from that one night I had come to ask about Jude, has ever brought me to this side of the Base. And even now, as I walk towards Beta Stephen's room, like a sheep to the kill, my focus is too occupied to be bothered about my surrounding.Why am I asked to come to his room?Is this proper?Room. Isn't that supposed to be like something sacred and intimate?Questions. Questions.None answered, but I have this nagging feeling that I will not like the outcome of this. The feeling comes like bitter taste in my throat.I had told no one of the previous words Beta Stephen had spoken to me, as there is obviously no one to tell, and I had also tried hard not to think about it. He had spoken in ambiguous words, so what if I was reading the wrong meaning?And why would someone list over me?Me?Like have you seen me?Okay, I have gotten compliments- from Pa, Casey's ma and Stefani- that I am on the pretty side, but with this pile of long black hair, that sometimes feel impo
RILEYIt has been two months, three weeks since Jude left.It has been two months, one week since I figured that Jude had been cheating on me.Well, I don’t know if I am to regard that as cheating as there is no explicit feelings or even intimate physical touch between us. Well, apart from…that. That intercourse that leaves me hurting in all places.Is it supposed to hurt?After ruminating over it for about a week, it began to feel like he was cheating on her.With me.I felt bad.I still feel bad.But, with the way Beta Stephen said it like a fact that everybody knows, I didn’t let him see how his words affected me. I couldn’t let him see the slight way in which my hands shook from the shock, the way the pulse line in my neck throbbed faster, as I tried to digest the content of what he had being saying.It had taken me a lot of will power to ignore the burn in my eyes and walk out of that room quietly. My head was hurting, my eyes and throat were burning and all I wanted to do was g
RILEY Theresa did the bed wrong.So I ended up doing it myself.As I I did the beds, for the first time in a long time, I felt like myself, as I folded my hair in a messy bun at the top of my head, folded the arms of my brown ‘home’ dress, got on my knees and got to work, tilling the ground with a tiny shovel and my hands.With constant visit to the delivery house and my afternoons I spent practicing with Gerald, it had taken me two weeks to till, water, and manure that hard ground, to make it prepared for whatever I put into it.Two weeks seems like a long time, but there is something about doing what you love. There is an unseen kind of pleasure you derive from it. For me, coming back to this space, by evening every day, feels like being given a gold bottle of grape juice after spending a long day in a desert.That calming effect.The chirping of birds and cold air remind me of how early it is as I bend to dodge the branch of a tree that stands like fingers, blocking my path.My p
RILEY“Don’t go there, Paul.” I stretch out to grab him.This, I have repeated for a hundred times now.How do those tiny creatures that only know how to cry and cling to their Ma, how do they get so stubborn and grow a will?“No. I want to go home.” He struggles to wiggle out of my grip.“We are almost done. Trust me, you will like the end part.” I coax.My calm words and soothing voice does nothing as he sits on the bare ground, exhausted from his struggle, and begins to cry. Heavy sobs with no sound.Pups and their drama.It has been a year.A whole year since Jude left and hasn’t returned.It has been difficult getting used to his absence and finding activities to keep me busy, with the aim of tiring myself out, so I’ll be so tired when I go to bed. Too tired to have those silly dreams of mine.It worked.I stopped dreaming about fighting strange creatures. And alongside this, I have a beautiful blooming garden at the backyard of the Base, I am almost a professional in the art of
RILEY“The Beta…”This startles me and I almost drop the book in my hands.I had been so engrossed in looking at that sentence in the book, I did not recognize the presence of a second party.My face is definitely red from where my thoughts had been a second ago, but I still take my attention to the intruder.Theresa.With the way she stands, saying nothing, while just assessing me, I guess my surprise surprises her too.Good.What does she want?I recover. Then turn back with a lot of poise and elegantly drop the book back into the box, where the others are.“I was engrossed in the gift my husband sent me for Winter Night. Oh, that man.” I say with an exaggerated chuckle.Why am I always like this with Theresa?Ever since I discovered that Jude must have been having something to do with her, I have been trying my best to prove that she might be the mistress or whatever, but I am the wife.I am Luna.I always feel a good kind of pride whenever her eyes, filled with envy, go to my pend
"I did not do anything to them.” I explain.I see them turn to look at the children with warm and attentive eyes.I don’t know what this looked like, but with the nonstop wailing of these pups, it doesn’t look like we have been friends all day and they had been triggered by a story.Jill moves closer, squats in front of Paul and softly grabs his little face. As if recognizing her as his once closed eyes come open, his cry subsides to become low sniffles.Wait.That is her kid? No wonder.“My darling why are you crying? What did she do to you?” the voice she uses in asking that, sounds nothing like Jill’s. It is soft and patient.I will myself to not get pissed that it is my word against a pup’s. I mean, it would be weird getting bullied by a kid, right?“Ma…Ma Luna says Bella’s mommy is late. Do you know what it means to be late, mommy?” his rudeness has disappeared, and now he clings to his mother’s hand like the kid he is.Jill takes a moment to throw a scary glance my way.I did no
RILEY“Don’t go there, Paul.” I stretch out to grab him.This, I have repeated for a hundred times now.How do those tiny creatures that only know how to cry and cling to their Ma, how do they get so stubborn and grow a will?“No. I want to go home.” He struggles to wiggle out of my grip.“We are almost done. Trust me, you will like the end part.” I coax.My calm words and soothing voice does nothing as he sits on the bare ground, exhausted from his struggle, and begins to cry. Heavy sobs with no sound.Pups and their drama.It has been a year.A whole year since Jude left and hasn’t returned.It has been difficult getting used to his absence and finding activities to keep me busy, with the aim of tiring myself out, so I’ll be so tired when I go to bed. Too tired to have those silly dreams of mine.It worked.I stopped dreaming about fighting strange creatures. And alongside this, I have a beautiful blooming garden at the backyard of the Base, I am almost a professional in the art of
RILEY Theresa did the bed wrong.So I ended up doing it myself.As I I did the beds, for the first time in a long time, I felt like myself, as I folded my hair in a messy bun at the top of my head, folded the arms of my brown ‘home’ dress, got on my knees and got to work, tilling the ground with a tiny shovel and my hands.With constant visit to the delivery house and my afternoons I spent practicing with Gerald, it had taken me two weeks to till, water, and manure that hard ground, to make it prepared for whatever I put into it.Two weeks seems like a long time, but there is something about doing what you love. There is an unseen kind of pleasure you derive from it. For me, coming back to this space, by evening every day, feels like being given a gold bottle of grape juice after spending a long day in a desert.That calming effect.The chirping of birds and cold air remind me of how early it is as I bend to dodge the branch of a tree that stands like fingers, blocking my path.My p
RILEYIt has been two months, three weeks since Jude left.It has been two months, one week since I figured that Jude had been cheating on me.Well, I don’t know if I am to regard that as cheating as there is no explicit feelings or even intimate physical touch between us. Well, apart from…that. That intercourse that leaves me hurting in all places.Is it supposed to hurt?After ruminating over it for about a week, it began to feel like he was cheating on her.With me.I felt bad.I still feel bad.But, with the way Beta Stephen said it like a fact that everybody knows, I didn’t let him see how his words affected me. I couldn’t let him see the slight way in which my hands shook from the shock, the way the pulse line in my neck throbbed faster, as I tried to digest the content of what he had being saying.It had taken me a lot of will power to ignore the burn in my eyes and walk out of that room quietly. My head was hurting, my eyes and throat were burning and all I wanted to do was g
RILEY Nothing, apart from that one night I had come to ask about Jude, has ever brought me to this side of the Base. And even now, as I walk towards Beta Stephen's room, like a sheep to the kill, my focus is too occupied to be bothered about my surrounding.Why am I asked to come to his room?Is this proper?Room. Isn't that supposed to be like something sacred and intimate?Questions. Questions.None answered, but I have this nagging feeling that I will not like the outcome of this. The feeling comes like bitter taste in my throat.I had told no one of the previous words Beta Stephen had spoken to me, as there is obviously no one to tell, and I had also tried hard not to think about it. He had spoken in ambiguous words, so what if I was reading the wrong meaning?And why would someone list over me?Me?Like have you seen me?Okay, I have gotten compliments- from Pa, Casey's ma and Stefani- that I am on the pretty side, but with this pile of long black hair, that sometimes feel impo
wake up with a start.There is sweat running down my back and I can as well feel goosebumps rising on my legs. I feel weak and it takes me a moment to realize where I am.The kitchen, of course.A ragged sigh leave my chest as I fold back into my resting place.I had vomited a lot today. There had been two very pregnant womene up for delivery and they had fallen into labour almost simultaneously. Being that the midwife could only focus her acre and attention on one, we had to split into group. Cleaning the woman’s sweat was my own duty, as they were fully aware of what a disaster it would be if I was involved with the bloody part of the business.Seeing the woman’s face had given me a whirlwind of emotions, as whike I try to be stong and focus on inanimate objects in the room, the woman wouldn’t just stop wailing.Moved by the ferocity of her screams, I had once barked at the midwife, which I was oaired with, to hasten up. My shout had made the room go sklent. Even the women kept qui
RILEY I have never been materialistic, or moved by materials, as I don’t remember owning or receiving gifts from anyone. I can also vividly remember that it was in a bid to get me a gift that my Pa ended up the way he ended up. So this overwhelming joy I feel as the pendant hang around my neck, is totally foreign to me. There is a permanent smile plastered on my face as I continuously look down to check if it’s real and not just a play out of my imagination. Beta Stephen is saying something to the crowd, I know. What he is saying, I don’t know. Is this how everybody feels on Winter nights? No wonder the happiness written all over their faces, both Young and old, as they try tone it down and concentrate on listening to Beta Stephen. I don’t blame them. I am not listening too. After getting the information from Gerald that this beautiful thing hanging around my neck is my Winter gift from Jude, my husband, I had grabbed the box, and read a deeper meaning of love and consideratio
RILEYMy fear continues to manifest.Three days turned into a week, with no word or sight of the love of my life.Slowly, the days have blended into one week. And one week into two.Two weeks of my boredom intensifying and leaving me with the most terrible imaginations of what could have befallen Jude. As often as it comes, I try to cleanse it with positive thoughts.But the bad thoughts won’t just go away.It has someway gotten into my dreams, so that I no longer see Jude and I in rosy, sunshine filled places, where the sun shone very bright and the wind blew very low. No. I now see myself in tight rubber jumpsuits, as a warrior. Always the same costume. And my mission in those dreams are always the same.There is no one giving me this mission, but I see myself going to rescue Jude from all manner of dangerous places.From a fire filled bottomless pit, inhabited by big scary looking dragons. From dark dry desert, where I have to combat with huge dinosaurs that had large noses. From