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Chapter 23: Save Me
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Mate or God? Chapter 24: Apologies
Jenna/Sr. ClaireSome people always said heaven is a paradise for everyone while others say not everyone will go there. I do believe both but if I have sinned a little would the door of heaven still be open for me after repenting in the purgatory. I think God will have mercy on my soul. Will he? I haven't killed anyone or do worse crimes than other people do but I know I have sinned. Blinking my eyes open the first thing I see is the ceiling. When I fell from the window down to the ground I knew God will save me. He saved me not to be in heaven but to live again in this world. I still have things that I need to face and mend before going peacefully to his heaven. I believe we all are given a chance. However, we always blew on those chances. I felt a hand on my hand which brought me out of my thoughts and then a gasp from someone. I turn to find the woman who gave birth to me looking at me with tears in her eyes. They are about to fall. "Jenna," she says with excitement. Standing
Mate or God? Chapter 25: Mistakes and Regret
ShawnThe truth was out and I can see that it has hurt Jenna deeply. I sit down on the bench at a park staring at a blank space before me. I feel like a sore loser with the way I sit here. Back in the room, I wanted to stay by her side when she told us off but I know that Jenna needed a space. It had been a week since she fell into a coma. I was excited to see her when her mother link us she was awake but I guess she wasn't so excited to see us. "Shawn she left" Hannah cry to me through the pack link. "I don't know where she runs off to" she added. "I will look for her," I told her and closed off the link. I stood up to go when I see Jenna running in my direction. This cannot be real, right? I try to slap myself as I watch her running towards me. I shake my head and take a step forward. "Jenna" I whisper waiting to welcome her in my now spread arms. "It-"She runs past me and straight to the riverside. She didn't see me. Am I invincible now? I thought the moon goddess is sending
Mate or God? Chapter 26: Sorry I love You
Jenna/Sr. ClaireThe last thing I remember before I fainted was Shawn holding me while I cry. God, why is it dark again here and why do I hear voices and not see faces? I question while trying so hard to open my eyes. I wanted to see but my eyelids are heavy. It's like I am imprisoned in my own mind. It's like I'm living in a nightmare and I wanted to escape from the darkness so bad. Therefore, I call out the name that I always knew would be here for me. God! I cry out. God! I called again while struggling to be free from the darkness that's about to consume me. "GOD!" I scream breaking away from the darkness. My eyes wide open, staring up at the ceiling. I sit bolt upright terrified by the darkness and thoughts of never seeing the light again. At the same time, I am heavily breathing. Once I am calm I try to reach up to touch my wet cheeks but something is pinning my hands down. "Hey, you're safe." I turn aside and find Colby with a relieved look on his face. I stare at him, no
Mate or God? Chapter 27: Going Crazy
Jenna/Sr. Claire"Forgive me, Lord." I kiss my cross tied to my necklace and place it in the top drawer. After another breakdown, I never bother to show my face at lunch or dinner. It is another day and I have been sitting here thinking of what to do until I made up my mind. And what I am going to do may sound crazy. However, for once I want to go crazy because I am going crazy of what had happened to me in the past. These people who claim to love, to know, and to say sorry to me are making me unstable again. I need to breathe. I need to live a little and just forget everything. I look at myself in the mirror once again. "This is it," I said to my reflection. Taking a deep breath I check my skinny jean, spaghetti top, and my two-inch heel. "It's time for Jenna to let loose" I mutter and grab my purse from the nightstand. I slowly close the door behind me and about to walk through the hallway way when a voice stops me. "You're going somewhere?" I turn to find Colby standing at the
Mate or God? Chapter 28: To Do List
Jenna/Sr. ClaireShawn left right after his promise, excusing himself that he has pack duties and I'm left with the kids. Despite that, we still enjoy our picnic even though it was kinda sad that Shawn missed out on the rest of the fun. Back to the pack house after our fun at the park. I sat in my room, thinking of his words before I get up and go to the shower. After a nice warm shower, I changed into a mid-knee floral 'skirt and a white tug-in blouse. I then put on pairs of white sneakers. I try to look for a pen and paper but I could not find it. I know one person I can get it from. Despite, not wanting to go but I have no option. I walk out of my room and head towards downstairs. I then turn right and made my way to Colby's office. When I reach it I knock on the door lightly. "Come in" I hear him from inside. The moment I open the door is the moment I regret coming here. Shawn, Hailey, and Hanna were all in Colby's office. They all look at me as if they saw a ghost. I clear my
Mate or God? Chapter 29: Glover
Shawn"Dad where is mo- aunt Sr. Claire?" asked Hans. I know my son is struggling between his biological mother and Jenna. I've seen him with her and sometimes I may have caught him in his room, wishing for Jenna to be his mother. I don't want him to have false hope because my relationship with Jenna is still questionable. "Dad, where's aunt Claire," his question snap me back from my trance. When my son arrived home he wanted to meet Jenna but I told him that she was a bit busy. Now I can't lie to him anymore. This has been going on for days and I didn't want to disappoint him by telling truth. After all he is just a child. My child. "She's in her room. why?" I ask him. "I miss her," he sadly said to me. I look at him sadly remembering that I have to win Jenna's heart again. I smile at him and bend down to his level."Okay, why don't we surprise her for a day out" I suggest and Hans jumps to his feet in excitement. "Dad, let's get ready" he drags me to the shower. After we get re
Mate or God? Chapter 30: Forgiven
Jenna/ Sr. ClaireTo forget is the hardest thing to do and that is why I don't forgive anyone easily. However, to see people that I used to despise work their way for forgiveness, my heart wavers. Shawn did live up to his promise and so did everyone else. After another month Shawn did earn my trust but not my heart. However, recently I am starting to feel it wavers for him. I have to be honest that every time I am with him I am smiling and happy. He didn't do anything to relive the unforgiveable past we had, rather he filled it with lights. Now I am conflicted between my feelings for him and my responsibilities as a nun. A woman who is already anointed to serve God. "Do you want more" Shawn said, pulling me out of my train of thoughts. I look up and see him wiggles his brow at the waffle on the spatula in his hand? I groan and rub my stomach. "No thanks, I am full," I said. He shook his head and place the waffle on an empty plate. "Morning uncle and aunty" I hear a cheerful voice
Mate or God? Chapter 31: Mother Superior
Jenna/Sr. ClaireOn the next day, I was sitting in my room meditating when my mother came inside unannounced. "I am sorry to interrupt you," she said. "Anything I can help you with?" She shook her head no and came to sit beside me. "I don't know if you still remember or even want to know it. Your sister has a pup. Ken, her mate took him away when Sophie died." I raise my brow. "Nephew?" I question and she nods her head yes. "I do visit them sometimes but ever since you came I haven't. Today I am going to see him at the Nightfall Pack and I just wanted to know if you want to come with me" I try to blink my eyes. This is another shocking news that I did not remember. Taking deep breaths I stood up and try to calm myself. When I am calm I said, "I want to see him if that's okay with you?" "Thank you Jenna" she raised her hand to touch me but I step back. I may have forgiven her but there is a boundary between us. She looked taken a back for a moment she look sad before she cover it
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