12 - Orphanage (1)

Max

Clara has been quiet on the plane ride home, stewing in her thoughts. She has a lot of things to process about her identity, her parents, and her sister. 'I would probably feet the same way if I ever find out about my past.'

'Is she really Carmen Jacobs? What does that mean for Jeremy and me when she finally reunites with her family? Will they be welcoming to us? Will they ask her to move in with them?' Now he started to get nervous.

'I would like to think she would not abandon us for her actual family. After all, she spent most of her life with us already, we have become her family. I just hope we continue to be together. I can't bear to lose Clara. There I said it.' These are the thoughts that plague Max. Thoughts he'd rather not entertain, but they seeped into his consciousness, and now he has to deal with it.

'Stop it! This is good for Clara, right? She will get closure, and maybe all her nightmares will go away? She won't need us anymore.'  And that made him sad.

-=-

When they got home, Clara showed Max and Jeremy the article they found about Celine’s sister passing away, and Max got excited. 

‘This is you, Clara, I’m sure of it. This is how you looked when we were kids after your bruises faded. I’m so happy we found your family.’ Max hugged her and dragged Jeremy to join in.

‘Why don’t you seem happy about it?’ Max asked.

‘Are we sure this is really me? What if we’re just guessing because we want this to be me so bad?’ Clara sighed as she touched her forehead.

‘Don’t be sad Clara, the orphanage probably had a picture when we were kids. We can just swing by tomorrow and ask for it, then everything’s going to be fine,’ Jeremy replied. ‘You’ll see Max is telling you the truth.’ He looks over at Max with eyebrows raised, saying, ‘Bro, you better be right about this.’

My sister does not look convinced, but she nodded and headed to her bedroom. ‘What else can I do. I know I am right. We just need proof.’

When everyone went to bed, Max started thinking about his family. He never admitted it to anyone, but like Clara, he had dreams of when he was younger. Of a mom... who would read to him during bedtime, sitting with her at a big long table while they ate. In the dream, he also had a dad… one that would carry him up high in the air and pretend he was an airplane, chasing him around the sofa… They were faceless figures, though, in the beginning, he remembered what they looked like. But by the time Clara got to the orphanage, they were nothing but memories. 

The dreams don’t visit him as often nowadays, but there's a song that keeps replaying in his head. He does not know the lyrics, but the melody haunts him all the time. In his memories, this song was in a foreign language… 

‘I hope that the days of old won’t fade away

When I was a baby in my mother’s arms

I wish to hear her song again

A song filled with love as she rocks my cradle’ 

(This song is the translated first verse of a Filipino song called “Ugoy ng Duyan”)

‘If in my dreams I had parents, where are they now? Something must have happened, right? A tragic accident? An unfortunate event? Maybe as Clara searches for the pictures, I can also dig around and see about my past.’

-=-

The siblings are back in the orphanage. Max did not have fond memories of this place. Aside from the days he spent with Clara and Jeremy, he would rather be somewhere else. As he walked the halls, he recollected the numerous times he slid on the floors while running away from the caretakers. The hiding places he used to evade being caught so he could run away from his chores. He was a naughty kid, always getting into trouble.

If he thought about it, the orphanage was not such a terrible place, except that his parents had left him there and never returned for him. He shook his head free of the cobwebs of the past. 

Clara’s philanthropic efforts had made the orphanage a better place. Providing the kids with the help they need, and more. Gone are the days they need to struggle to find food. 

The caretakers handed over his and Jeremy's guardianship to Clara as soon as she turned 18. And he busted out of there like a man with ants in his pants. He vowed never to come back, but years later, when Clara forced them to volunteer and care for the welfare of the kids in the orphanage, he realized that the kids still living there needed their help, and he could not begrudge Jeremy and Clara his help, he could not deny these innocent kids his service.

He erased the bad memories from his mind. They had one goal there that day, to find the picture that would link Clara to the article in the newspaper. He wanted to get it as soon as possible and get his records if that was possible.

-=-

‘I haven’t seen all three of you here in a long time, and my, how you’ve all grown.’ Ms. Powell beamed like she was their actual mother.

‘Max and Jeremy, you boys are growing to be very handsome men.’ Mrs. Powell patted their cheeks. ‘Don’t make the girls cry, okay?’ and they both smiled.

‘And you, my dear, have become more beautiful. A little thinner than before and with dark circles around the eyes, but still beautiful,’ she lovingly caressed Clara’s cheek.

‘Have you been sleeping well these days? I saw your article in the newspaper and congratulations on the launch of your new product. Some of your staff installed a few of your cameras here, but I doubt we’ll need it. Who comes and steals at an orphanage, anyway?’

‘It’s not that, it’s for security. So you can see who sneaks out at night. We can’t have vandals or disobedient teenagers lurking around.’ Clara replied.

Max laughed. ‘Good thing you didn’t have those when I was here.’

The Powell family and the Johnson siblings have known each other for 10 years. And during those years, they have grown fond of each other, treating each other like family, to where Mr. and Mrs. Powell asked the siblings to call them Ma and Pa.

Max thinks the place would have been better if the Powells were there when they were kids. He probably wouldn’t have the growing resentment of happy families, adopted kids, and other more fortunate children. 

Despite all of Clara’s efforts to show him how it is to have a happy, loving family, he still felt there was a place in his heart that had been left empty and is void of feeling. It was a space nobody could fill. Sex definitely didn't do it, so the distraction of the string of women he slept with couldn't provide him with anything but a momentary reprieve from his loneliness. ‘Can Celine fill that void? Maybe I should just end it now? She’s Clara’s sister, after all. I doubt she'll want to see me again.’ He shakes the thought away.

‘Well, that’s the reason we are here,’ said Max. ‘Clara hasn’t been sleeping well these days. We believe we’ve found her real family, and we wanted to see the records when the original caretakers took her in.’

‘Hmm…,’ Mrs. Powell started opening drawers.

‘Did they keep a record or picture of us when we were kids? That’s all we need. Maybe we can help you find it,’ Jeremy volunteered.