CHAPTER THIRTEEN: On His Lap

I… could not even begin to describe what was happening.

One moment I had been standing, dizzy and unsteady, the pressure in my chest flaring too fast for me to breathe through. The room had tilted, voices blurring into noise, my heart pounding like it was trying to force its way out of my ribs.

The next, Alpha Kael sat down without ceremony.

And pulled me with him.

Onto his lap.

Not gently.

Not roughly.

Just… decisively. 

'Thank goodness his aides stopped him and he didn't bring me to his room.'

'But this... isn't this a bit more equally,,,embarrassing?' My breath left my lungs in a small, humiliating sound before I could stop it.

The room froze.

Every single person in it.

I felt it before I saw it. The collective stillness. The way even the air seemed to pause, as if the palace itself had drawn a breath and forgotten how to release it.

Someone inhaled sharply.

Another voice started to speak and cut off mid-word.

“My lord—”

I felt it instantly.

His body beneath me was solid...solid in a way that did not allow doubt. Not soft. Not yielding. Muscle and warmth and a presence so real my senses stuttered trying to keep up. His thighs were firm under mine, supporting my weight easily, like it had never occurred to him that they wouldn’t. His chest was close enough that I could feel the slow rise and fall of his breathing against my back.

Each breath was steady.

Measured.

Unbothered.

Mine was not.

‘Oh gods.’

Heat rushed to my face so fast it felt like I might combust from embarrassment alone. My hands hovered uselessly at my sides, unsure where to go, terrified of touching him and equally terrified of not anchoring myself at all.

I could feel everything.

The heat of him at my spine.

The strength of his arms bracketing me without actually holding.

The way his body did not shift to accommodate me… because he did not need to.

Around us, no one moved.

I could sense eyes everywhere without daring to look. Elders. Councilors. Guards. People who were absolutely not meant to witness this.

And worst of all… the way my heart reacted.

The pressure inside my chest eased almost immediately.

Not vanished.

But loosened.

Like something clenched too tightly had finally been allowed to breathe.

‘No. No no no.’

This was not happening.

I tried to shift back, just a little, instinct screaming that this was too much. Too close. Too exposed.

Alpha Kael’s voice dropped beside my ear.

“Stay still.”

Two words.

Quiet.

Absolute.

My movement stopped without my permission.

My heart jumped hard enough to hurt.

His arm moved then. Not wrapping around me, not touching my chest or my waist, but settling across my middle with deliberate restraint. Minimal contact. Controlled. Intentional. A boundary that somehow felt firmer than an embrace.

“Unless,” he added calmly, eyes still on the councilor in front of him, “you would prefer the energy in your heart to explode.”

The words landed with terrifying casualness.

Someone dropped a parchment.

It hit the stone floor with a sharp, echoing sound that felt far too loud.

“I—I’ll continue, my lord,” the councilor said, voice strained, scrambling to gather his notes. “As requested.”

Alpha Kael lifted a finger slightly.

“Continue.”

As if nothing unusual was happening.

As if I were not sitting on the Alpha’s lap.

As if my entire body had not just been turned inside out.

My body reacted anyway.

The warmth beneath my ribs shifted, slow and deliberate this time. Instead of pressing outward, instead of clawing and burning, it began to move. Sliding. Draining. Pulling toward the point of contact between us like water finding its course.

I gasped softly before I could stop myself.

A few heads snapped up.

Alpha Kael did not look down.

Did not adjust.

Did not react.

He listened.

I forced myself to breathe.

In.

Out.

Slow.

With each breath, the burning eased. The ache softened fraction by fraction. The energy that had felt wild and suffocating now moved with purpose, leaving me lighter with every second.

My shoulders sagged before I could stop myself.

Relief was dangerous.

Because relaxing made me aware of everything else.

His body heat.

The solid line of his chest at my back.

The subtle tension in him that had not been there before.

I stilled.

Something had changed.

His breathing remained steady, but deeper now. His arm tightened just slightly, not enough to hurt, just enough to register.

Controlled.

Restrained.

My face burned hotter.

‘Oh.’

The realization settled with mortifying clarity.

He was not unaffected.

He was controlled.

There was a difference.

I shifted without thinking, a tiny movement born of nerves and panic.

His arm tightened instantly.

“Don’t,” he murmured, so quietly only I could hear.

The word sent a shiver straight through me.

Not fear.

Something worse.

“Relax,” he added calmly, almost lightly. “You’re stabilizing.”

Stabilizing.

The absurdity of it nearly broke me.

I focused on the feeling instead. On the way my heart no longer felt clenched. On the way my breathing evened, each inhale smoother than the last.

My head tipped forward without meaning to.

Just enough that my temple brushed his shoulder.

The contact was accidental.

But his body reacted instantly.

I felt it.

A sharp inhale.

Small.

Unmistakable.

My entire body went rigid.

“That,” Alpha Kael said evenly, interrupting the report mid-sentence, “will be all.”

The councilor stopped speaking at once.

Chairs scraped.

Papers were gathered too loudly.

Footsteps shuffled as people stood far too quickly.

No one looked at me as they filed out.

No one dared.

When the room finally cleared, the silence felt heavier than before.

I started to lift myself from his lap, relief flooding through me.

It was over.

It had to be over.

“Wait.”

The single word stopped me mid-movement.

I froze.

Alpha Kael rose instead.

And before I could react, his arms came around me fully and lifted me as if I weighed nothing at all.

The world tilted.

My breath left me in a startled gasp.

I clutched his shoulder instinctively as he carried me against his chest, one arm under my knees, the other secure at my back.

Princess style.

In the open hall.

Gasps echoed.

“My lord—” someone whispered.

Alpha Kael did not slow.

“We’re not done yet,” he told me calmly....to calmly...

And the worst part was that my body…

finally felt steady.