Chapter one.

Oh no, this cannot be happening. Please tell me I'm hallucinating because this cannot be happening!" Elias hunched over, her eyes squeezed shut as she tried hard not to think about it. 

"Fuck, Elias!" Alex's furious voice sliced through the quiet room, "I cannot believe you. Are you insane to have such a book?" He voiced with barely suppressed anger. 

"I can't believe this is really happening," Elias raised her head again, staring at her twin brother through her round glasses. She needed to wake up from this dream right now. 

Alex pushed off the counter and approached her, "What were you thinking when you were writing on that book? Do you know how ridiculous it is? Writing up all your dirty thoughts in a book about Kaelen, about my Rival!"

"It wasn't meant for anyone to see," She mewled, wishing the ground would open up and swallow her. 

"Oh really?" Alex scoffed, his voice dripping with disbelief, "Because it sure as hell seems like it was on broadcast on the morning announcements. Every Goddamned person in this entire school has read it, Elias. Every student in this college now knows about the dirty fantasies you have of Kaelen..." He slammed his fists against the counter next to her, "Do you know what this means for me, for us, Huh?"

Elias straightened up, facing her brother as a tremor of anger ran through her, "For you? This isn't about you, Alex. This is about me, it's my humiliation. My private life, plastered all over the Northwood College, and the school website for everyone to see, and you're worried about your image?"

His gaze hardened, and he met her eyes, "Of course it affects me, Elias. It affects me when my twin sister writes a tell-all about her secret - Oh! Not so secret obsession with the guy I'm supposed to hate. The guy I'm supposed to beat on the track and the field. How am I supposed to face him now, Elias?"

Elias let out a sickening laugh, holding back her tears, "You don't have to worry about your reputation, Alex. People barely know we are siblings. You're the captain of the soccer team here, and I'm just another nerd in school. We are fraternal twins, and we have no resemblance so if you're so worried about yourself as always, just pretend you don't know me!"

Alex nodded tightly, "You're right. I've never told anyone you're my sister, and you're never one to talk, so what the hell am I worried about?"

"Exactly. It's not your problem!" 

Then, Alex took a step close to his sister again, his eyes flashing a warning at her, "You better not involve yourself with Kaelen, Elias. He's more dangerous than you think. Once all this has died off, continue living the rest of College with your head down as always. This is our last year here, after all,"

' Kaelen ' Elias thought, and a blush crept up her neck, hot and mortifying. She could imagine Kaelen's face, those stunning grey eyes and the usual smirk, now with the knowledge of her deepest and darkest desires. 

It made her want to dig a hole and live inside for the rest of her life. 

.

.

..

Two Days Ago...

The lights of the stadium blazed, highlighting the manicured green expanse of the football field. The crowd roared, everyone taking their sides in this intense match-up between the Titans and the Centurions. 

Alex McIntyre of the Titans, Captain of the Football team of the School of Arts, moved fluidly across the football field, dribbling the ball across. There was a look of barely contained frustration etched on his face as they were down by two goals. 

Meanwhile, Kaelen Nightshade, the Captain at Engineering, wore a dark jersey, exuding a quiet confidence, his sharp eyes taking every note of what was happening in the field. 

In a few minutes, the ball was back with the Centurions.  

"Hey, there you are!" A familiar voice called, and Elias felt a hand touch her shoulder. She tore her gaze off Kaelen and looked up to see Chloe, her best friend taking the seat next to her. 

"What took you so long?" Elias asked.

"Popcorn. The queue was long," Chloe replied, her voice a bit loud over the noise everywhere, "So, where are we at?"

"Engineering took the lead when they scored two goals after we gave them one," Elias replied, dipping her hand and taking a handful of popcorn as her gaze flew back to Kaelen again. 

The sweat on his face glistened in the light, and he always looked so good with his long hair tied back. 

As an art student, Elias was supposed to be cheering for the Titans. But when her crush was on the opposing team, she was secretly happy they were winning. Also, it was very nice to see a frustrated look on her twin brother's face...he kind of deserved it. 

"What?" Chloe gasped, "How many minutes are left till the game is over?"

"Fifteen,"

"Hopefully we can get them back. A draw wouldn't be so bad, either," Chloe begged, before she turned around and stared across everyone seated, "Have you seen Jason around?"

Jason was Chloe's talking stage, and from the looks of it, she really liked him, a lot. 

"I think he's somewhere at the back, I'm not sure," Elias replied, her eyes glued back on Kaelen again. 

"I wanna give him some popcorn after the match," Chloe stated, still searching for him. 

Suddenly, Kaelen was passed the ball and he shot it straight toward the goal. The goalkeeper tried to reach it, but he wasn't fast enough for one of Kaelen's explosive shots and it went right into the goal. 

The Engineering students on the other side of the field roared and cheered with happiness, and everyone here groaned, their excitement dying down. But it didn't stop them from getting back on their feet and resuming the cheers. 

Everyone loved Alex a little too much, even though he was a bad boy. 

The rest of the game passed with the Titans trying to defend their court, and the referee soon blew the whistle to signal the end of the match. The Centurions and engineering spectators went wild with happiness, and a lot of girls kept yelling Kaelen's name and giggling whenever he looked their way. 

The day ended after the match, and everyone went their way.

Chloe met up with Jason a few minutes after the match, while Elias stood at a considerable distance away from them. She could see Chloe blushing uncontrollably as she handed him the popcorn, and he said something that made her laugh. Then, he placed a hand on her shoulder. 

Elias didn't know much about Jason, but from the moment Chloe had told her about him, her thoughts didn't sit well with the guy. It's one of those times when you meet someone everyone seems to like, but you just get this bad feeling about them.

But Elias never mentioned anything about it to Chloe since she didn't have any evidence that Jason was a bad guy in any way. 

Chloe and Elias walked home together, with Chloe's apartment just ten minutes away from Elias's. They would have stayed at the same apartment, but it was a little too small for two people. 

"Damn it!" Chloe scowled, still angry at today's match, "I can't believe we lost! We usually win, or it's a draw. Ugh, it's so frustrating, honestly!"

"Yeah," Elias didn't relate at all. Today, she was glad the Centurions had won the game, "It is, a lot!"

"I hope your brother isn't too mad. He kind of looked like he really wanted to punch someone when the game ended," Chloe stated. 

In the whole school, Chloe was the only one who knew Alexander McIntyre was her twin brother, and it had also taken a bit of explaining for Elias to convince Chloe that it was true. 

Elias was a nerd. She had these huge round glasses always on and couldn't see a thing without them, and was always putting on sweatshirts even when it was hot outside. 

While Alex was insanely handsome, tall, muscular and a popular guy in school. Also, Elias was part of a book club or reading at night, Alex was at parties having fun all night and yet, he still managed to keep his grades up. 

The twins were complete opposites. 

"I feel bad for him. I'm sure they'll win next time," Elias said, but she sincerely hoped they wouldn't and of course, she didn't feel bad for them. 

About fifteen minutes into their walk, Elias sighted a tall, lean figure wearing sunglasses and waving at her from across the road. Not too far from him was his car, parked by the side. 

Why was he here again? 

"Chloe, give me a few minutes," Elias said, and walked over to where Alex stood waiting for her. 

As she approached him, he took off the sunglasses, revealing his hard, green eyes. "What do you want?" Elias frowned at him. 

"Mum says she's been calling you since yesterday, but you haven't been picking up her calls," He complained. 

"Oh, look who finally remembered she has a daughter too!" Elias said sarcastically.

"Pick the goddamn call!" He barked at her. 

"What? So she can complain over the phone again like she usually does? Look, I already know what she's gonna say. I've been hearing it all my life," Elias fired back. 

"Just answer the fuckin call, El. She's also mad you didn't come home last weekend,"

"Why is she worried about me when she has you? Tell Mum to leave me alone!" Elias warned. 

"Are you insane, El? Your mother wants to talk to you and you're...,"

"Oh, for Goodness' sake, stop it!" Elias groaned, cutting him off, "We both know what she's gonna say. She's gonna start comparing me to you again, just like dad, and nothing I say or do will ever satisfy her. She's always been all over you, like everyone else, since the beginning. My own share of my parents' love is hearing them complain about how I never leave my room, and how I never fit in, or my choice of clothing and how I'm socially awkward, and all," Elias paused, "I'm tired of all that, okay? I just wanna live my life without the constant pressure. So when you see mum today, tell her I said I'm fine and she doesn't need to keep buzzing my phone like she cares,"

Alex rolled his eyes, "One of these days, I'm gonna drag you home. Or better still, I'm gonna give mum your address,"

Elias's gaze turned into fury, "Don't you dare, Alexander. Don't you!"

"Then call her back!" He deadpanned and wore his sunglasses before walking back to his car and driving away. 

Elias stood there for a few seconds, trying to compose herself again before going back to meet Chloe. 

"You good? It looked like you guys were arguing," Chloe quipped as Elias walked back to her. 

"We are always arguing, it's nothing new!" She said stiffly, and they continued their way. 

Elias said goodbye to Chloe once they got to her apartment, and she strode the remaining ten minutes to hers which was at the far other end of the block. 

Once she was home, she freshened up and changed from her sweatshirts to a baggy shirt. Elias pulled out a leftover ice-cream from the fridge and devoured it as she completed an assignment from school that was due next week. 

By the time she was done, night had fallen and she laid alone staring at the ceiling, thinking about Kaelen Nightshade. 

Elias recalled the first time she had set her eyes on him. It was during the first year of college and her dad had called while she was at her part-time job as a waitress at a local restaurant, demanding to speak with Alex as he wasn't picking his phone. Elias had told her father Alex was probably practicing at the field, but he had forced her to go all the way to school just to speak with his son. 

She was walking into the field, her eyes fixed on her brother who was drowning a bottle of water by his side when a ball flew out of nowhere and slammed into her head. 

A few of the guys there burst into laughter, and the phone fell to the ground. Her eyes spun for a bit, and she lost her footing and was falling. 

But a hand pressed on her back from behind to keep her standing, and she glanced back and saw Kaelen for the first time. 

Their eyes had met, and she had fallen in love at first sight. 

Although she might have freaked out a bit after he had touched her back and ended up running out of field, leaving the phone behind. 

Kaelen had become very popular in no time, and she had always swooned over him from afar, afraid to get close due to her personality. The girls around him were rich, and flirty and gorgeous, and Elias was just, well, Elias. 

It had gotten worse during her second year when she began to have fantasies about Kaelen. Sexual fantasies of him and her together, doing it everywhere. Her imagination had been so wild it often shocked her, and the worse part, she had begun to write it all down. 

Many times, she would dream about them together not just having sex, but of them being a couple. Fantasies of them getting married and having kids together. But most of all, it was the sexual fantasies. She wrote down every detail in her imaginations, and not even Chloe, her best friend since middle school, knew about this side of her. 

It was Elias's crazy, dirty little secret. 

And by now, Elias had a large jotter which was almost filled with her fantasies of Kaelen, and she was looking to get a new book very soon because she was very sure her mind was gonna think up even more dirty, kinky stuff. 

.

.

.

Elias's attention was focused on Professor Albert the next morning in class, with Chloe sitting next to her about to doze off. 

The professor was explaining something complex, and Elias reached into her bag to pick out her jotter when she felt something was off. Her fingers touched a familiar soft leather, instead of the worn out cover of her usual spiral bound jotter, and an icy dread ran through her. 

Slowly, she pulled it out from her bag. 

It was the journal, the one she filled with every scandalous fantasy she's had about Kaelen. She must have grabbed during her chaotic morning rush!

With a frantic shove, she buried it back inside her bag, anxious as hell. 

The second Albert dismissed them, Elias flew off her seat. She had an hour before the next lecture, and needed to go back to her apartment and get the proper notebook with the fastest way being passing through school of engineering. 

She clutched her back to her chest as she weaved through clusters of students, her eyes fixed on the exit sign she was gradually approaching. 

Elias rounded a corner, her head down and dashed forward, only to run into an immovable wall. She yelped as she fell backward on her butt, and her bag slipped from her grasp and landed with a soft thud. 

The click opened as the bag hit the ground, and the jotter rolled out of it, falling open right under someone's feet, exposing what was written on its papers. 

But only for a second. 

Elias quickly reached out and snatched it up along with her bag, her heart hammering loudly before she finally looked up to see who it was. 

The most beautiful Grey eyes she's ever seen stared back at her, along with the face she always saw in her dreams. He remained composed despite their collision, and Elias's heart almost stopped upon seeing him. 

Kaelen.