Chapter 5

My lungs burned with more intensity than it did when I had just been yanked out of the tank. My face twitched with even more pain than when my father had smacked just a couple of hours ago. My limbs and every part of me ached with new torment. 

And my heart? My heart was shattering with so much force, I could almost hear it through my ears. The crashing sound that each piece made when it felt the pressure of my own mate's betrayal. 

Fool.

I could hear the words from deep within me. I know how deep because I have heard the exact same word from the same place a couple of times before but it seemed I was destined to hear it all my life, destined to know that I was a fool and a failure. 

I first heard that word from inside of me when I was five and was trying to convince all my peers that my mother was still alive and she was going to come back to me. 

I heard the word again when I was nine and I had just woken up after being beaten unconscious by my father and thought maybe if I tried harder that he would love me. 

.

And once more, when it was becoming apparent that I was unable to shift, I heard the word when I thought that I did not need a wolf form to stand out and be the best version of myself. 

All these time, no matter how humiliating it was to admit it, the voice inside me had always been right, I was a fool. My mother never returned and my father's hatred grew with each rising of the sun. Without a wolf form, I was sentenced to slavery and publicly disowned by now. 

But staring at the couple who were shamelessly fraternizing in front of my eyes, I knew that the voice was most accurate today. 

I was a fool to allow myself a second to daydream of a future where I would no longer be known as just omega. A future where I would have a family, a future filled with love, laughter and safety, a future with a mate. 

But his words had performed magic for me. It had given me a glimpse of a life that I could have had if I was just a little bit different or if the author of my story could spare me any kindness. 

But that was wistful thinking. I should have known by now that I alone did not have the power to change my fate and no one was willing to assist me in changing it. 

So this is my story and it will remain so. 

The bitter chill of rejection pierces my heart once again as Gray turns his back on me without a word. 

The mate the moon goddess has sent to me as my only source of joy doesn't even spare me a glance as he walks away, off to join the mate his council has chosen for him. 

Not me. Never me. 

My father, the Gamma, sees me as a waste. 

My packmates sneer and jeer, enjoying my pain. 

And my fated mate Gray, whose rejection cuts deeper than any wound.

I thought I knew heartbreak when my mother died birthing me but this agony is so much worse. 

Every day I pray to the Moon Goddess for a family to call my own, for acceptance, for love. 

My prayers go unanswered. 

Each day, there are whispers that I am cursed, that my existence brings misfortune to the pack. If only they knew the turmoil steaming inside me.

But I will endure. 

Even as wolves come to me claiming friendship while concealing wicked motives. 

I have survived worse. I am stronger than they know. 

There are secrets about me, truths my so-called pack tries to bury. 

My identity.

My power.

My purpose - all hidden from me by lies. 

But I will uncover it all. The course of my life is changing, veering into unpredictable territory. 

But I am ready for whatever comes. My story has only just begun.

I am Lyra, the wretched Omega whom no one wants.

*** 

By some grace, I was able to escape both Raven and my mate and ran straight to my room. It is here that I always found little bits of comfort and solace and I hoped that I would find it today. 

But I was wrong. As I sat down on my bed. A wave of restlessness hit me, jerking me to my feet. Once on my feet, my legs began to tremble from fatigue and just unbridled pain from the lashings of my own father, I fell back down. 

A teardrop broke free at the thought of the scene from earlier today. He had asked to see me and just a word that did not sit right with him was able to make him so enraged he completely forgot about why he even asked me to come there. 

And then that broken posture of his that preyed on my kind heart. Anger rose inside of me when I remembered feeling pity for him. Oh Lyra, you indeed are a fool. 

I held my face as if it had just been smacked by him and it wasn't just a memory. And then I remembered the curses that I would die mateless like him. 

And then, Gray's rejection happened. 

No! My father's curse came true. 

"I can't resist you" came the voice of Gray, startling me till I almost fell to the ground. 

"W-what are you doing here?" I asked, trying not to get lost in his eyes once again, trying to remember my place and accord him the respect of his. 

"I just told you. I can't resist you Lyra" his voice was hoarse with deep feeling and a hunger for me that I had never experienced.

"But you are marrying…"

Before I could complete my sentence, his lips had been plastered on mine while his tongue invaded my mouth.