My Straight Childhood Sweetheart

ETHAN'S POV;

The moment I stepped out of my house, I felt something I couldn't quite explain.

Excitement.

It wasn't the kind of excitement that came from receiving good news or having something amazing planned for the day. It was quieter than that, almost embarrassing in a way, like my body knew something my mind hadn't figured out yet.

I adjusted the strap of my backpack over my shoulder and glanced down at my uniform.

First day back.

After an entire month of holidays, I was finally returning to school.

Maybe that was what had me feeling so strangely excited.

Maybe I was simply tired of staying at home, tired of waking up late, spending hours on my phone, and listening to my parents remind me that I had assignments waiting for me.

Or maybe...

I already knew the real reason.

I just didn't want to admit it.

I smiled faintly as I started walking toward the gate.

I was going to see Adrian McRae.

My best friend.

Even thinking his name made something warm settle in my chest.

It had been a month since we'd last seen each other.

Thirty-one days.

Not that I had counted.

Okay.

Maybe I had.

I was reaching into my pocket for my phone when it suddenly vibrated against my hip.

I pulled it out and glanced at the screen.

Adrian.

A smile immediately found its way onto my face.

WHAT'S UP, BUDDY! WHERE ARE YOU?

I stared at the message for a second before typing.

ME: At the front of my house. Where else would I be?

I sent it and slipped the phone back into my pocket.

Then I looked across the street.

Adrian's house stood directly opposite mine.

Our families had lived across from each other for years, which meant Adrian and I had practically grown up in each other's homes.

I was still looking at his front door when it suddenly opened.

And there he was.

Adrian stepped outside.

For a moment, I forgot what I had been thinking.

He looked good.

Of course he did.

Adrian somehow always looked good without trying.

His brown hair fell naturally over his forehead, slightly messy in the way that somehow made it look perfectly styled. 

His school uniform was as neat as ever, his shirt tucked in properly and his tie sitting exactly where it was supposed to.

He looked taller too.

Maybe it was the holiday.

He had spent most of the break in Canada visiting his father, and apparently a month was enough time for him to return looking like he'd somehow grown several centimeters.

Or maybe I had simply forgotten how tall he was.

Either way, it made him look even more noticeable.

I understood why almost every girl in school seemed to have a crush on him.

Adrian was popular without even trying to be.

Teachers liked him.

Students knew him.

Girls found excuses to talk to him.

Even people who barely knew him somehow knew his name.

But none of that had ever changed the way he treated me.

To him, I was just Ethan.

His buddy.

His best friend.

His person.

And maybe that was why seeing him again made me so happy.

Adrian spotted me almost immediately.

His face brightened.

"Ethan!"

He crossed the street toward me with a grin.

I tightened my fingers around my phone.

Why was I suddenly nervous?

It wasn't like this was the first time I'd seen him.

I'd known him for years.

Years.

Yet my heart was beating faster than it should have.

"Morning," I said.

He didn't even answer.

Instead, the moment he reached me, he pulled me into a quick hug.

I froze for half a second before laughing.

"Seriously?"

"What?" Adrian pulled away, still smiling. "I've been gone for a month."

"You've been gone for a month, not a year."

"Same thing."

I shook my head. "You're ridiculous."

"And you missed me."

"I did not."

"You did."

"I absolutely did not."

Adrian laughed.

I hated how easily his laughter made me smile.

"So," he said, looking me over. "How have you been?"

I raised an eyebrow. "You can guess."

"Same old Ethan."

"Exactly."

He reached toward the side of his body and lifted a gift bag I'd somehow failed to notice.

"Oh."

He held it out to me. "This is for you."

I stared at the bag."For me?"

"Yes."

I slowly took it. "What is it?"

Adrian shrugged, pretending to look uninterested.

"Check it out."

I looked at him suspiciously.

"You didn't put something weird inside, did you?"

"Why would I do that?"

"Because you're Adrian."

"Fair."

I laughed and opened the bag.

Then I stopped.

Inside was a pair of sneakers.

Not just any sneakers.

The exact edition I'd been talking about for months.

The ones I'd seen online countless times but had refused to buy because they were too expensive.

My mouth fell open.

"You got these?"

Adrian nodded.

"You said you wanted them."

I looked down at the sneakers again. "You remembered?"

"Of course I remembered."

I lifted my eyes to him. "Adrian..."

"Don't."

"But—"

"No thanking me."

"I was going to say you're crazy."

"That works too."

I laughed. "Thank you."

He sighed dramatically. "I literally just told you not to thank me."

"Too late."

He shook his head.

"That's why we're buddies. You can't listen."

Something about the way he said it made me smile.

Buddies.

That was what we had always been.

Best friends.

Nothing more.

"Come on," Adrian said, checking his phone. "We shouldn't be late."

I looked toward the road. "Especially not on the first day."

"Exactly."

We started walking toward school together.

Adrian immediately launched into stories about Canada.

Apparently, his father had taken him sightseeing, he'd nearly gotten lost in a shopping mall, and he'd somehow managed to embarrass himself in front of a group of tourists.

I laughed so hard at one part that I nearly dropped the gift bag.

"You actually did that?"

"I swear."

"You're unbelievable."

"I didn't know the elevator would open on the other side!"

"That doesn't even make sense."

"I know."

We continued walking, Adrian talking animatedly beside me.

And somewhere between his ridiculous story and my laughter, my mind drifted backward.

Six years old.

That's how old we'd been when we first met.

I could still remember it.

I had been the quiet kid who preferred staying near the edges of the playground.

Adrian had been the exact opposite.

Loud.

Confident.

Fearless.

He had walked up to me one afternoon and asked why I was sitting alone.

I hadn't known what to say.

So he'd simply sat beside me.

That was it.

No complicated introduction.

No dramatic beginning.

He had just decided that we were going to be friends.

And somehow, he had been right.

Over the years, we'd become inseparable.

When we were children, some older boys used to make fun of me because I was quiet and smaller than most of them.

Adrian had always stepped in.

He never cared whether they were bigger than him.

He would stand beside me and tell them to leave me alone.

Sometimes he got into trouble for it.

Sometimes we both did.

But he never stopped.

That was Adrian.

He had always been there.

When I was sick, he checked on me.

When I struggled with schoolwork, he helped me.

When I had a bad day, he somehow knew before I said anything.

And whenever something good happened, he was always the first person I wanted to tell.

As we grew older, our friendship only became stronger.

People at school joked about us constantly.

They called us an old married couple.

Whenever one of us appeared without the other, someone would ask where the missing half was.

Adrian always laughed.

I did too.

But lately, those jokes didn't feel as harmless to me.

Because somewhere along the way, something had changed.

I couldn't pinpoint exactly when it happened.

Maybe it was gradual.

Or it had been happening for years without me noticing.

But Adrian wasn't just my best friend anymore.

At least, not to me.

I looked at him as he continued talking about Canada.

He was smiling while telling me about an embarrassing encounter he'd had at a restaurant.

I laughed.

"You're telling me you actually spilled an entire drink on yourself?"

"It wasn't my fault."

"How was that not your fault?"

"The table was uneven."

"The table?"

"Yes."

I laughed again.

Adrian smiled at me.

And suddenly, everything around me seemed to become quieter.

The cars passing on the road.

The voices of students walking toward school.

The sound of our shoes against the pavement.

Everything faded into the background.

I looked at him.

Really looked at him.

At the smile on his face.

At his brown hair falling slightly over his forehead.

At the way his eyes narrowed whenever he laughed.

At how naturally he walked beside me, as if being together was the most normal thing in the world.

And then it hit me.

Not gradually.

Not gently.

All at once.

I suddenly remembered every time I'd waited for him after school.

Every time I'd looked for him first in a crowded room.

Every time I'd felt strangely upset when another person got too close to him.

Every time I'd replayed his kind words in my head before falling asleep.

Every time his smile had made my entire day better.

I swallowed.

No.

It couldn't be.

I looked away quickly.

But the realization had already settled inside me.

I had spent years calling Adrian my best friend.

I'd convinced myself that the strange feeling in my chest was simply what happened when you cared deeply about someone.

I'd told myself that my jealousy was normal.

That missing him too much was normal.

That wanting to be the most important person in his life was normal.

But standing beside him now, after an entire month apart, I finally understood.

My feelings weren't normal friendship.

They hadn't been for a long time.

I was in love with Adrian McRae.

My best friend.

The boy who had always been there for me.

The boy who had just bought me the sneakers I'd wanted and hugged me like he'd actually missed me.

And somehow, realizing it for the first time made one terrifying thought immediately follow.

Adrian had never looked at me that way.

At least...

I didn't think he had.

I forced a smile when Adrian turned toward me.

"Why are you smiling like that?" he asked.

I shook my head.

"Nothing."

He narrowed his eyes suspiciously.

"You're hiding something."

"I'm not."

"You're terrible at lying."

I laughed nervously.

"Just keep walking."

Adrian smiled and continued beside me.

I looked ahead.

Our school was already visible in the distance.

The first day of the new term had barely begun.

And somehow, without Adrian knowing it, everything between us had already changed.

Because from that morning onward, I could never look at my best friend the same way again.