Always My First

ETHAN'S POV;

By the time Adrian and I reached the school gates, I had almost convinced myself that the realization from earlier had been nothing more than a moment of weakness.

Almost.

I walked beside him with my hands tucked into my pockets, trying my best to act normal.

It wasn't working.

Every time I looked at him, I remembered what had hit me on the road.

I was in love with him.

I still couldn't believe it.

For years, I'd thought of Adrian as my best friend. The person I trusted most. The person I wanted beside me whenever something good or bad happened.

But now that I'd finally admitted the truth to myself, every little thing he did seemed different.

The way he smiled.

The way he called my name.

The way he walked beside me as though there was nowhere else he would rather be.

Even the gift he'd given me that morning suddenly felt far more important than a pair of sneakers should have.

I glanced at him.

He was scrolling through his phone while walking.

"Why are you so quiet?" he asked without looking up.

"I'm not."

"You've barely said anything since we left your street."

"I'm just tired."

He finally looked at me. "Already?"

I shrugged. "Maybe."

He stared at me for another second before smiling.

"You're weird."

"You've known me since we were six. You should be used to it."

"I am."

He slipped his phone into his pocket. "And that's why I like you."

My heart skipped.

I immediately looked away.

He probably meant it the way he'd always meant it.

As his best friend.

Nothing more.

I needed to remember that.

Unfortunately, the school entrance had other plans for me.

The moment we stepped through the gates, several students noticed Adrian.

And suddenly, they were everywhere.

"Adrian!"

"You're finally back!"

"Where have you been?"

"Canada, right?"

"Why didn't you tell us you were coming back today?"

"You look different!"

"Did you get taller?"

"Seriously, Adrian, you look so good!"

I stopped walking.

Adrian didn't even seem surprised.

A group of girls surrounded him almost immediately, while several guys came over to greet him and ask about his trip.

I stood a few steps away, watching.

One girl was asking him about Canada.

Another wanted to know where he'd gone sightseeing.

Someone else was already telling him how much they'd missed seeing him around school.

I couldn't help but smile.

Of course.

It was Adrian.

He'd only been away for a month, yet everyone was acting like he'd disappeared for a year.

One of the girls touched his arm while laughing at something he said.

I looked away.

Why did that bother me?

I sighed quietly.

This was exactly why I'd never told him how I felt.

Adrian belonged in the center of attention.

He was confident, friendly, handsome, and effortlessly popular.

I was just Ethan.

His childhood best friend.

The person who stood beside him when the crowd disappeared.

And that was enough.

It had to be.

I waited patiently while everyone talked to him.

After a few minutes, Adrian finally looked over and noticed me standing alone.

His expression immediately changed.

"Ethan."

He excused himself from the group and walked toward me.

Before I could say anything, he casually wrapped an arm around my neck.

"Let's go."

I blinked. "You're done talking to your fans?"

He laughed. "Fans?"

I gestured behind us. "Those people."

Adrian looked over his shoulder at the students he'd just left.

"They're not my fans."

"They were practically fighting each other for your attention."

He laughed again. "You're exaggerating."

"I'm not."

We continued toward the main school building.

His arm was still around my neck.

I tried not to think about it.

That was becoming increasingly difficult.

His hand rested comfortably against my shoulder, and every now and then, his fingers shifted slightly as we walked.

I could smell his cologne.

It was subtle.

Clean.

Something I'd probably never notice before today.

Now, for some reason, it seemed almost impossible not to notice.

I swallowed.

Why was I suddenly so aware of everything?

Adrian looked down at me. "Wait."

"What?"

"Are you jealous?"

I nearly stumbled. "What?"

He grinned. "Of them."

"No."

"Really?"

"Really."

"You looked jealous."

"In your dreams."

He laughed loudly. "I knew it!"

"I wasn't jealous."

"Then why did you ask if I was done talking to my fans?"

"Because I was waiting for you."

He raised an eyebrow. "And?"

"And I was bored."

"You missed me."

"I never said that."

"You didn't have to."

I rolled my eyes.

"You've become very annoying."

"Only today?"

"Especially today."

He laughed again.

I tried to hide my smile.

This was the Adrian I knew.

The Adrian who had spent most of his life beside me… who could make me laugh even when I didn't want to… who always somehow knew when something was wrong.

His arm tightened slightly around my neck as we walked.

Not enough to hurt.

Just enough to pull me closer.

I could feel the warmth of him beside me.

For a moment, neither of us spoke.

Students moved around us as we approached the main building, but I barely noticed them.

Then Adrian spoke. "You know I'll always be with you, right?"

I looked at him. "What?"

He shrugged casually. "I'm serious."

I smiled awkwardly. "You always say that."

"Because it's true."

I looked ahead.

He had said it countless times before.

Whenever we had arguments.

Whenever one of us made a new friend.

Whenever I worried that he was becoming too popular or too busy for me.

Adrian always said the same thing.

NO MATTER HOW MANY FRIENDS I HAVE, YOU'LL ALWAYS BE MY FIRST.

I'd always laughed whenever he said it.

Because obviously, it wasn't literally true.

People changed.

Friendships changed.

We were growing up.

Soon we'd graduate.

We'd go to different universities.

We'd meet new people.

Maybe one day, Adrian would have someone he loved more than anyone else.

Maybe he'd get a girlfriend.

Maybe he'd eventually build a life that had nothing to do with me.

I knew that.

I understood that.

Yet hearing him say it now felt different.

Maybe because I wanted his promise to mean something more than friendship.

I wanted to believe that no matter where life took us, there would always be a place beside him that belonged to me.

Not as his best friend.

Not as the boy he'd known since childhood.

But as someone he couldn't imagine his life without.

I knew I couldn't ask for that.

So I settled for what he gave me.

His friendship.

His attention.

His ridiculous promises.

His arm around my neck as we walked through the school entrance.

"You've gotten quiet again," Adrian said.

I forced myself to smile.

"I'm thinking."

"About what?"

"Nothing important."

He studied me for a moment.

I expected him to question me again.

Instead, he simply smiled.

That same sweet smile he'd given me countless times throughout our childhood.

"Come on," he said. "We're going to be late."

He gave my shoulder a small squeeze before we continued walking together.

I looked at him one more time.

And despite knowing that my feelings could never be as simple as they used to be, I couldn't stop myself from smiling.

Because somehow, with Adrian beside me, the first day of school didn't feel so frightening anymore.

Adrian gave me his usual sweet smile as we walked into the main school building.