Bitter Chocolate II

I stepped into the bathroom, a spacious and sleek looking one. One mirror had a long crack running through it, I avoided looking at my reflection and headed straight for the far sink, turning on the hot water full blast.

My hands fumbled with my soaked hoodie, peeling it off. The fabric clung to my skin, reluctant to let go. I discarded it into the sink with a wet plop and immediately regretted it what if I couldn't get it clean? It was the only hoodie I had left, the others were too worn out to be used in public. Alpha Magnus would be furious about the waste.

"Calm down Sera, One problem at a time"

I cupped my hands under the water and splashed my face vigorously scrubbing away at the chocolate. It was stubborn, clinging to my skin, my eyelashes, and worst of all, my hair. The water turned a murky brown, swirling down the drain.

"You're so pathetic," I whispered to myself, scrubbing even harder. "Weak. Worthless."

Just like they all say.

No. I stopped, tightly gripping the edges of the sink. That voice was not mine, it was theirs.

I finally looked up.

The girl staring back at me was a big mess. Chocolate still smeared on her face, darker against her pale skin. Her dark brown hair hung in wet, tangled ropes. But her eyes, a warm brown with flecks of gold I'd never really paid attention to, held something fierce.

Something that refused to be broken.

"You're still here," I told my reflection. "You survived today and you'll survive another day, that's all that matters."

It wasn't much of a pep talk, but it was all I could muster.

I spent the next thirty minutes cleaning myself up as best I could. My hoodie was unsalvageable, still soaked and stained. I squeezed the water out leaving it to dry, and pulled on Kade's hoodie instead.

It was unbelievably big even with his lean build, hanging far past my hips, the sleeves covering my hands entirely. But it was warm and clean.

My phone buzzed in my pocket, an ancient thing, miraculously held together with a cracked screen protector and prayers. It was a text from Margaret, the head cook.

Margaret: Where are you? Dinner prep starts in 10 minutes. Don't be late.

Right. Because being humiliated at lunch didn't excuse me from my duties.

I replied, "On my way, will be there soon."

I took one last look at the mirror. I looked almost normal, if you didn't count the red-rimmed eyes, the redness of my skin from the impact of the hot chocolate, and the exhaustion etched into every crease on my face.

"You're still here," I repeated quietly. "You're a survivor and that alone counts for something."

Did it, though?

I grabbed my horribly ruined hoodie, still damp but wearable enough. I couldn't bring myself to abandon it. I unlocked the bathroom door.

The hallway was no longer empty because lunch time was long over. Students streamed between classes, lockers slamming, voices raised in conversation, and laughter. I blended into the crowd, keeping my head down, deliberately making myself small.

Invisible.

A skill I'd perfected over the years. Moving through spaces without being noticed. Taking up as little room as possible. Existing without really existing.

"Sera!"

Or not.

I abruptly turned to find Maya Chen jogging toward me. Maya was a sophomore, a beta-ranked wolf, and one of the few people in this school and pack who didn't treat me like dirt. We definitely weren't friends, I didn't have friends, but she was... less cruel. Sometimes she even smiled at me in the hallways.

"Hey," I said timidly.

Maya fell into step right beside me, her black ponytail swinging back and forth. "I heard what happened to you at lunch. Are you okay?" She asked, her voice softer.

The question took me by surprise. I rarely get asked that question. "I'm....fine."

"Eleora's a horrible bitch," Maya said bluntly, then looked around to make sure no one had heard her. "What she did was messed up."

"It's fine, really. I'm used to it." I repeated, because what else could I even say? Thank you for your concern, but there's nothing anyone can do about it.

"It's not fine, you're not fine" Maya insisted, looking at me with sadness in her eyes. She lowered her voice. "Look, I know we're not close, but if you ever need someone to confide in....."

She trailed off, looking a bit uncomfortable. I understood, being seen with someone like me was a social suicide. Even a brief conversation like this in a crowded hallway was extremely risky for her.

"Thanks," I said, meaning it. "But really, I'm okay."

Maya didn't look the least bit convinced, but she nodded. "Okay. But my offer still stands."

She headed off toward her next class, leaving me alone with my thoughts again in the stream of students.

If you ever need someone to talk to.

What would I even say? That I was tired? That some days I thought about just walking into the forest and never coming back? That the only thing keeping me here was the illogical hope that somehow, things might get better?

No. Those weren't things you said to people especially when they weren't your friends. Those were things you buried deep and pretended never existed.

I made it to the pack house in less than 10 minutes. The huge building loomed ahead, a massive structure of stone and timber, five stories tall, with wings that spread out like arms. It housed the Alpha's family, the high-ranking pack members, and the servants like me. My room was in the basement, next to the water heater.

The kitchen entrance was around back. I slipped through the door into the familiar organized chaos.

"There you are!" Margaret looked up from where she was chopping the vegetables. She was a round, plump woman in her fifties, with gray-streaked hair always pulled back in a bun and flour perpetually dusting her apron. The closest thing to a mother I'd ever had. "I thought you'd forgotten."

"Sorry," I mumbled, grabbing an apron from the hook. "Got held up."

Margaret's eyes narrowed, quickly taking notice of the oversized hoodie, my damp hair, and swollen eyes. "Held up, or held under?"

I busied myself with tying the apron. "Does it matter?"

"Sera...."

"I'm here now," I gently interrupted. "What needs to be done?"

Margaret sighed heavily, and I could feel her concern. But she didn't push. She never did and I appreciated it. Maybe because she knew there was nothing she could do about it. Or maybe because she was tired of fighting battles she couldn't win.

"The potatoes need to be peeled," she said finally. "Twenty pounds. And the dining room needs to be set. Fifty place settings tonight.....the Alpha is hosting visiting pack leaders

Just great. More work to do and more people to avoid.

I began working, losing myself in the familiar kitchen labor. Peeling potatoes was meditative, repetitive, and soothing to me. The knife moved in steady strokes, brown skin curling away to reveal pale flesh beneath.

My hands knew this work by memory. My body knew it too. I could do it without thinking, leaving my mind free to wander.

"You exist. You contaminate this school with your weakness."

The knife slipped, nicking my thumb. The blood welled up, bright red contrasting my pale skin.

"Be careful child," Margaret chided, still focused on her vegetables.

I stuck my thumb in my mouth, tasting copper, and reached for a Band-Aid from the kitchen's stocked first aid kit. We needed a lot of Band-Aids with me around.

The cut wasn't deep, so it would definitely close up the next day. Even with my slow healing, minor injuries closed up quickly. It was the bigger wounds that took time.

I wrapped the band-aid around my thumb and resumed peeling.

An hour later, the potatoes were all done, and it was time to start setting the dining room. I grabbed the cart loaded with plates, silverware, and glasses, and wheeled it down the hallway.

The dining room was a massive one, with a table that could seat sixty. Tonight would only be fifty settings, but it was still a whole lot of work. I moved methodically, placing each item with care. Plate, fork, knife, spoon, glass. Then repeat.

"Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in."

I froze, the plate in hand hovering over the table.

Zane stood in the doorway, his bulky arms crossed, a smirk on his face that I always wished I could wipe off. He was a huge one, easily 6'4, with the kind of muscles that came from months and years of dedicated training. Dark hair, darker eyes

"Zane," I acknowledged quietly, setting down the plate.

"Is that all you have to say?" He pushed off the doorframe and confidently sauntered into the room. "After you humiliated Eleora today?"

My hands clenched tightly around the next plate. "I didn't......"

"You made her look bad in front of Damien," Zane continued, circling the table just like a predator. "Made her seem cruel, excessive. You know how she gets when people see her that way."

"I didn't do anything," I repeated, anger rising in my chest. "She poured chocolate on me and I just sat there."

"Exactly." Zane stopped across the table from me, leaning his hands on the polished wood. "You just sat there, looking pathetic as always, making her look like the bad one. That's manipulation, omega."

The logic was so twisted I almost burst out laughing. Almost.

"I'm sorry," I said instead, because that's what you usually said to make them go away. "I didn't mean to cause problems for her."

"Yeah, well. You always cause problems just by your existence." Zane straightened, rolling his shoulders. "Eleora wants her thirty dollars by Friday."

"I don't have thirty dollars."

"Then I guess you'd better figure something out." His smile was all teeth. "Unless you want me to retrieve it another way."

The threat hung heavily in the air, ugly and unmistakable.

"I'll get the money," I said quickly.

"Good." Zane headed for the door, then paused. "Oh, and Sera? That's a nice hoodie. Little big for you, though. Where'd you get it?"

My blood ran cold. "I found it.", I said, voice emotionless

"Found it." He said it like he couldn't believe me. "Quite interesting. Because that looks just like Kade's hoodie. The one he had on this morning."

"I don't know who it belongs to," I lied. "Someone left it in the bathroom and I needed something to cover myself up, so I took it."

Zane studied me for a long moment, and I fought the urge to squirm under his gaze.

"If you say so," he finally drawled. Then, quieter: "But if I find out Kade's going soft, helping out filth like you....that wouldn't be good for either of you."

He left, and I sagged against the table, breathing fast

Kade. I'd just put him in danger. If Zane told the others, if they thought Kade was being kind to me...

I had to return the hoodie. Tonight. Before anyone else noticed.

But first, I had to finish setting up the tables, help to serve dinner, and clean up afterward. The pack leaders would all soon be here, and Alpha Magnus expected perfection.

I went right back to work, moving at a faster pace now. Don't think about Zane. Don't think about Eleora. Don't think about the thirty dollars you don't have.

Just focus on today.

Tomorrow would take care of itself.