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No Alpha But Myself
No Alpha But Myself
Author: Zoe bear

Chapter 1

Author: Zoe bear
Today was supposed to be my mating day.

The day Cain Blackfang would mark me as his Luna, in front of the whole Ashveil Pack. We’d trained together since we were pups. Everyone said we were the perfect match. Future Alpha and Luna. Balanced. Predictable. Safe.

I smoothed down the front of my cloak for the hundredth time and glanced toward the entrance again.

Still no one.

Not a single soul had shown up—not my parents, not my brother Dax, not even Cain.

Just me, standing alone in the silence.

I pulled out my phone and checked for the fifth time. No new messages. My thumb hovered over Cain’s name before I called again.

It rang twice, then went to voicemail.

I stared at the screen, unsure whether to laugh or throw it against the stone wall.

Then the pack announcement flashed across it:

[WELCOME HOME ERIS DARKTHORNE]

A video auto-played.

There they were—my family. All of them. Gathered at the arrival gates of the northern ridge, where the skycrafts landed. My father beamed, my mother teared up, and Dax had lifted Eris into a spinning hug. Even Cain was there, standing just behind her.

Eris’s golden hair glinted under the lantern lights. Her arm curled tightly around Cain’s like she belonged there.

She always did.

My chest burned.

A moment later, my phone buzzed again. This time it was Cain.

“Stop being dramatic, Vera,” he said, his voice dry, like I’d called to complain about the weather. “We’ll do the ceremony later. Eris just got back from Alpha training at Wolfsbane Academy —”

The line cut.

I stared at the screen, my claws itching to come out.

Around me, the ceremonial hall remained silent, filled only with the soft rustle of moonflower petals falling to the floor.

I looked down at the cloak I’d spent hours sewing silver threads into. It pooled around me now like shed fur, like something I didn’t deserve to wear.

I slipped it off and left it there.

The Stormveil Packbuzzed with noise when I returned.

Someone had roasted meat on the back grill. Eris’s perfume floated through the halls—rose and sweetleaf, strong enough to push every other scent away. Laughter echoed from the main room. A celebration, loud and thoughtless.

No one noticed when I slipped inside through the kitchen door.

I went straight to my room, sat on the edge of my bed, and stared at the list I’d written in my journal. A simple list. Every time I’d been forgotten. Overlooked. Passed over.

I added another entry at the bottom:

Mating ceremony—no one came.

A knock slammed against the door.

It creaked open, and Dax stepped inside like he owned the place, his boots heavy on the floor.

“There you are.” He looked me over, taking in the fur cloak now folded by my desk and the half-written letter to the Council. “Eris wants your meatloaf. Make it spicy—she says she missed the way you cook it.”

I stared at him, hands resting on my lap.

“You missed my mating ceremony.”

Dax blinked, then shrugged like it didn’t matter. “It’s just a ritual. You and Cain can do it next moon, or the one after. Eris’s back, Vera. We haven’t seen her in a year.”

He picked up my journal from the desk, flipped through it without asking.

“You still writing this stuff down?” His eyes landed on the fresh page. At the top in bold letters:

FINAL WARNING.

He snorted. “What’s that supposed to mean? You gonna run away? To be a rogue?”

He tossed the journal back onto the bed. “Just make the meatloaf, Vera.”

I stood slowly and walked past him toward the kitchen. My hands stung as I pulled out the meat from the cold box. The new soap they’d brought back for me to use—Eris’s favorite brand—had left red blotches on my skin.

Dax leaned against the wall behind me, watching too closely.

“Why are you so quiet?” he asked. “Planning to poison her or something?”

Before I could answer, her voice rang out from the main room.

“Daxee! The chestnuts!”

He rolled his eyes and muttered, “Coming,” before turning and leaving without a second glance.

I washed my hands under cold water, watching the red fade into pale pink. My eyes drifted to the counter.

There sat the ceremonial cake I’d ordered. Still untouched.

The bonding rings lay beside it, sealed in their velvet box.

I didn’t cry.

I just stood there for a long time, staring at all the things that were supposed to matter.

My wolf had been quiet all day, but now her voice was sharp in my head.

Vespa, my wolf, growled low in my chest.

“They’ve made their choice,” she said. “So will we.”

I looked toward the window. Beyond it, the dark trees of the northern woods swayed gently in the night wind.

Eris was back. She had everything.

And me?

I was done waiting.
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  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 2

    I set the meatloaf down on the long oak dining table, the scent wafting through the air like a forgotten promise.Laughter echoed from the living room.Father, usually buried in Alpha Council meetings and Ashveil Pack’s logistics, sat comfortably, listening intently as Eris gushed about her time at Wolfsbane Academy.“We practiced under the pack elder Eldric,” she said, eyes shining. “He said I had the instincts of a born Alpha—strong enough to lead any pack.”Mother clutched Eris’s hand, eyes shimmering with emotion.“My sweet girl. You’ve lost weight, haven’t you? You need more rest—too much time in training will weaken your wolf and dull your senses.”Dax sat beside them, still dutifully peeling chestnuts like some Beta servant.I stood quietly at the threshold between the kitchen and living room—watching, never invited.That room was warm, bright, full of voices and attention.This room—mine—was quiet, dim. Forgotten.Eris’s voice rose with performative sweetness.“Vera, why are yo

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 3

    Eris’s rash bloomed across her skin like a warning from the moon goddess."Is this… an allergic reaction?" Father barked, nostrils flaring as he hovered over her convulsing form. "Why would this happen now?"Mother’s gaze snapped to me like a dagger drawn under moonlight. In the next heartbeat, her palm collided with my cheek, sending me sprawling across the tiled floor."Vera! What did you put in the food? Have you forgotten your sister’s triggers?!"My head rang. The room swam. I could feel Vespa stir within me, a low growl rising in the depths of my chest. But I shoved her back, swallowing the heat clawing at my throat.Dax stepped forward, eyes flashing in disbelief."You were so quiet… so obedient. And now this? You meant to harm Eris.""How did I end up with a sister like you?" he added, his voice heavy with disappointment."Enough!" Father slammed his fist on the table, the sound reverberating like thunder. "Get her to the healer now!"The room cleared in a blur—my parents and D

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 4

    The lights were off. Mother assumed I was asleep.She hadn’t expected me to overhear their discussion about giving up my mate, as if I were merely a placeholder in Selene’s shadow.When I walked past her, calm but cold, her face stiffened with fear.“I’m returning to the outpost,” I said flatly, ignoring the faint ache in my chest—the burn of betrayal that still lingered.Mother exhaled sharply, realizing I wasn’t about to explode. Father gave a curt nod, his approval silent. Good. Less trouble for the pack.Dax, however, stepped forward, his eyes narrowing at the duffel beside me.“You’re taking your things? Are you really running away because we’re upset about what happened to Selene?”“You think that little apology call makes it okay?”Their guilt from earlier—so fleeting—had already been replaced by righteousness. It always shifted like that: a second of shame, then back to their cold duty.“Your sister was hospitalized, Vera,” Father growled. “And you haven’t even properly apologi

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 5

    This time, no one tried to stop me.Dax’s voice called out behind me, faint and unsure.“Why didn’t you make a fuss this time?”I didn’t answer. There was nothing left to fight for.Back at the Outpost, I shut everything out—my phone on airplane mode, my focus locked on the border. For thirteen days, I trained hard and took extra shifts on patrol, keeping my head down and my thoughts quiet. The work was brutal, but steady. By the end of it, something inside me had settled.The next day, I turned on my phone.It vibrated nonstop—messages crashing in from the pack, from Cain, from people I’d once thought of as friends.I opened my friend’s messages first.Dozens of them. All furious, all aimed squarely at Eris and Cain. And then one photo that made my blood still.A family photo.Everyone was there—my parents, Dax, Eris, and… Cain.He stood beside her, his expression soft. Familiar. Like someone who’d finally found his place. Like someone who’d always belonged at her side.The caption re

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 6

    The line went quiet after my words.Then came Cain’s low chuckle, confident in all the wrong ways.“Vera, are you serious? After everything we planned for the mating ceremony? You’re really ending it over a tantrum?”I exhaled slowly. “So you do remember how long this has been arranged.”He still thought I was bluffing.“Come on. You’re just upset. I said I’d make it up to you. Acting cold won’t change how I feel.”I didn’t need to explain anymore. When I heard Dax arguing with him in the background, I hung up. Then I blocked every number tied to the Stormveil Pack—Cain included.That night, I slept through the night for the first time in weeks. And I dreamed.In the dream, I saw a young girl curled on the floor of a cold outpost barrack. Her uniform was too big, her hands covered in healing scrapes. She scribbled something into a journal—half numbers, half thoughts, never full sentences. A quiet record of everything she swallowed down.Today, I covered someone else’s patrol again. No

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 7

    I made my rejection clear.But it didn’t matter.They came anyway.I returned from patrol, boots still caked in dust and ash, only to find them waiting outside the Outpost gates—four shadows I had no use for anymore: my father, my mother, Dax… and Cain.The Ashveil Pack’s core.They lit up like they’d found something they’d lost.“Vera! You’re back!”Cain stepped forward first, before Dax could block him.“Long time no see,” he said softly.He looked wrecked. Bloodshot eyes. Shaky hands. The kind of desperation that used to stir something in me.Now, it just made me tired.“We’re over,” I said flatly. “Why are you here?”His mouth twitched, trying to hold something in.“I didn’t agree to that. It was just a fight.”“I don’t need your permission to leave.”I didn’t raise my voice. The truth was enough.When I looked past him to the others, I saw them flinch—small reactions, but they were there.“I heard what you said that day,” I added.My mother looked away. My father’s jaw clenched. E

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 8

    “Do I have to accept your apology?”I met Dax’s eyes, my voice low but heavy enough to make him flinch.The courtyard outside my dorm, usually alive with the chatter of young wolves, had gone eerily quiet. The tension between us had drawn curious glances. They couldn’t understand our words, but the weight of it was palpable—something was breaking.I hated the idea of being on display. But there was no hiding this.All those years of silence, of shrinking away from my own emotions, came rushing out.“You say you redirected your love to Eris, like that makes everything okay. But why did she get your protection, while I got nothing but your dismissal?”“You hated it when I fought her. Said I was loud, too rebellious. But if I hadn’t fought, you wouldn’t have even seen me. You would’ve let me fade into the background.”“I found something better when I left. I went to the outpost. At least here, I earned my place. There, I wasn’t just some quiet shadow of the golden child. There, I had powe

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  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 8

    “Do I have to accept your apology?”I met Dax’s eyes, my voice low but heavy enough to make him flinch.The courtyard outside my dorm, usually alive with the chatter of young wolves, had gone eerily quiet. The tension between us had drawn curious glances. They couldn’t understand our words, but the weight of it was palpable—something was breaking.I hated the idea of being on display. But there was no hiding this.All those years of silence, of shrinking away from my own emotions, came rushing out.“You say you redirected your love to Eris, like that makes everything okay. But why did she get your protection, while I got nothing but your dismissal?”“You hated it when I fought her. Said I was loud, too rebellious. But if I hadn’t fought, you wouldn’t have even seen me. You would’ve let me fade into the background.”“I found something better when I left. I went to the outpost. At least here, I earned my place. There, I wasn’t just some quiet shadow of the golden child. There, I had powe

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 7

    I made my rejection clear.But it didn’t matter.They came anyway.I returned from patrol, boots still caked in dust and ash, only to find them waiting outside the Outpost gates—four shadows I had no use for anymore: my father, my mother, Dax… and Cain.The Ashveil Pack’s core.They lit up like they’d found something they’d lost.“Vera! You’re back!”Cain stepped forward first, before Dax could block him.“Long time no see,” he said softly.He looked wrecked. Bloodshot eyes. Shaky hands. The kind of desperation that used to stir something in me.Now, it just made me tired.“We’re over,” I said flatly. “Why are you here?”His mouth twitched, trying to hold something in.“I didn’t agree to that. It was just a fight.”“I don’t need your permission to leave.”I didn’t raise my voice. The truth was enough.When I looked past him to the others, I saw them flinch—small reactions, but they were there.“I heard what you said that day,” I added.My mother looked away. My father’s jaw clenched. E

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 6

    The line went quiet after my words.Then came Cain’s low chuckle, confident in all the wrong ways.“Vera, are you serious? After everything we planned for the mating ceremony? You’re really ending it over a tantrum?”I exhaled slowly. “So you do remember how long this has been arranged.”He still thought I was bluffing.“Come on. You’re just upset. I said I’d make it up to you. Acting cold won’t change how I feel.”I didn’t need to explain anymore. When I heard Dax arguing with him in the background, I hung up. Then I blocked every number tied to the Stormveil Pack—Cain included.That night, I slept through the night for the first time in weeks. And I dreamed.In the dream, I saw a young girl curled on the floor of a cold outpost barrack. Her uniform was too big, her hands covered in healing scrapes. She scribbled something into a journal—half numbers, half thoughts, never full sentences. A quiet record of everything she swallowed down.Today, I covered someone else’s patrol again. No

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 5

    This time, no one tried to stop me.Dax’s voice called out behind me, faint and unsure.“Why didn’t you make a fuss this time?”I didn’t answer. There was nothing left to fight for.Back at the Outpost, I shut everything out—my phone on airplane mode, my focus locked on the border. For thirteen days, I trained hard and took extra shifts on patrol, keeping my head down and my thoughts quiet. The work was brutal, but steady. By the end of it, something inside me had settled.The next day, I turned on my phone.It vibrated nonstop—messages crashing in from the pack, from Cain, from people I’d once thought of as friends.I opened my friend’s messages first.Dozens of them. All furious, all aimed squarely at Eris and Cain. And then one photo that made my blood still.A family photo.Everyone was there—my parents, Dax, Eris, and… Cain.He stood beside her, his expression soft. Familiar. Like someone who’d finally found his place. Like someone who’d always belonged at her side.The caption re

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 4

    The lights were off. Mother assumed I was asleep.She hadn’t expected me to overhear their discussion about giving up my mate, as if I were merely a placeholder in Selene’s shadow.When I walked past her, calm but cold, her face stiffened with fear.“I’m returning to the outpost,” I said flatly, ignoring the faint ache in my chest—the burn of betrayal that still lingered.Mother exhaled sharply, realizing I wasn’t about to explode. Father gave a curt nod, his approval silent. Good. Less trouble for the pack.Dax, however, stepped forward, his eyes narrowing at the duffel beside me.“You’re taking your things? Are you really running away because we’re upset about what happened to Selene?”“You think that little apology call makes it okay?”Their guilt from earlier—so fleeting—had already been replaced by righteousness. It always shifted like that: a second of shame, then back to their cold duty.“Your sister was hospitalized, Vera,” Father growled. “And you haven’t even properly apologi

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 3

    Eris’s rash bloomed across her skin like a warning from the moon goddess."Is this… an allergic reaction?" Father barked, nostrils flaring as he hovered over her convulsing form. "Why would this happen now?"Mother’s gaze snapped to me like a dagger drawn under moonlight. In the next heartbeat, her palm collided with my cheek, sending me sprawling across the tiled floor."Vera! What did you put in the food? Have you forgotten your sister’s triggers?!"My head rang. The room swam. I could feel Vespa stir within me, a low growl rising in the depths of my chest. But I shoved her back, swallowing the heat clawing at my throat.Dax stepped forward, eyes flashing in disbelief."You were so quiet… so obedient. And now this? You meant to harm Eris.""How did I end up with a sister like you?" he added, his voice heavy with disappointment."Enough!" Father slammed his fist on the table, the sound reverberating like thunder. "Get her to the healer now!"The room cleared in a blur—my parents and D

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 2

    I set the meatloaf down on the long oak dining table, the scent wafting through the air like a forgotten promise.Laughter echoed from the living room.Father, usually buried in Alpha Council meetings and Ashveil Pack’s logistics, sat comfortably, listening intently as Eris gushed about her time at Wolfsbane Academy.“We practiced under the pack elder Eldric,” she said, eyes shining. “He said I had the instincts of a born Alpha—strong enough to lead any pack.”Mother clutched Eris’s hand, eyes shimmering with emotion.“My sweet girl. You’ve lost weight, haven’t you? You need more rest—too much time in training will weaken your wolf and dull your senses.”Dax sat beside them, still dutifully peeling chestnuts like some Beta servant.I stood quietly at the threshold between the kitchen and living room—watching, never invited.That room was warm, bright, full of voices and attention.This room—mine—was quiet, dim. Forgotten.Eris’s voice rose with performative sweetness.“Vera, why are yo

  • No Alpha But Myself   Chapter 1

    Today was supposed to be my mating day.The day Cain Blackfang would mark me as his Luna, in front of the whole Ashveil Pack. We’d trained together since we were pups. Everyone said we were the perfect match. Future Alpha and Luna. Balanced. Predictable. Safe.I smoothed down the front of my cloak for the hundredth time and glanced toward the entrance again.Still no one.Not a single soul had shown up—not my parents, not my brother Dax, not even Cain.Just me, standing alone in the silence.I pulled out my phone and checked for the fifth time. No new messages. My thumb hovered over Cain’s name before I called again.It rang twice, then went to voicemail.I stared at the screen, unsure whether to laugh or throw it against the stone wall.Then the pack announcement flashed across it:[WELCOME HOME ERIS DARKTHORNE]A video auto-played.There they were—my family. All of them. Gathered at the arrival gates of the northern ridge, where the skycrafts landed. My father beamed, my mother teare

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