Se connecterTommy..Two days had passed and the third day was already halfway gone.Time didn’t behave as it used to, morning and night felt the same way since that day.I felt sick. Not metaphorically, not psychologically but physically sick.My body refused to cooperate. I only go out of bed when I want to drink water, piss, or shit.I had barely eaten. The food refused to stay down.I spent the day lying down, feeling my heart shatter over and over again. I had had heartbreaks before. But none of them felt like this.None of them lingered this long. In a few hours, maybe a day I would be outside again. Working. Laughing. Almost like nothing had happened. But this time. It felt like I was the one coming to an end.Every time I thought about Gerard, sharp physical pain would shoot through my chest.Sometimes I caught myself wondering what he was doing. Was he sleeping peacefully? Was he eating well?Was he hurting the way I was?And something bitter would coil in my chest. I hope he was s
TOMMY..I stared at Gerard. Not until my eyes started burning did I realize I hadn’t blinked.Why?The words kept slamming repeatedly in my mind—pounding over like it was a second heartbeat.I wasn’t angry. No matter how I searched for it, I couldn’t. I didn’t want to punch him like I wanted to with Liam.Just confusion so deep it scorched.Why? Why? Why?My chest tightened so violently for a moment, I genuinely thought—this is it. I was having a heart attack. My heart felt like it was shrinking, and my lungs were withering. Breathing right now, felt like a miracle.I dragged another shaky breath, one that didn’t even feel real.Gerard stood there, shoulders tight, eyes like he was standing before a hurricane. “I can explain,” he said, voice rough like someone was scratching a nail against a wall.Something snapped in me. A sound left my throat—too broken to be a laugh, too loud not to be.“Let me guess.” My eyes pinned him. “You made the best decision for me.” My throat burned r
GERARD..I watched Tommy disappear through the glass door of the building.He turned back once, smiled, and then he was completely gone.For a moment, I just sat there, breathing like it took effort, the sunlight filtering through the windshield hurting my eyes.The tension holding my spine finally snapped and I collapsed forward, chest pressing against the steering wheel.God. I should have told him. I almost did. I wanted to tell him. Every second this morning, every pause between sentences.But those eyes they way they cling onto me, as if I could never hurt him. Like I was in a safe place.They made me swallow the words even when they were right on the tip of my tongue.I dragged my hand down my face and exhaled. At least he had seen the videos of the dog syndrome. He’d understand why I had lied.Sooner or later, I’ll tell him, I told myself for what felt like the thousandth time.While I was drowning in my thoughts, my phone pinged, snapping me out.Kalea: Where are you? You h
TOMMY..The next morning I woke up, not completely peaceful, but peaceful enough to want to get up and go to work.I got out of bed and took my shower. I searched through my wardrobe, searching for a sharp suit.Today I had one goal. I was going to make a deal with my father. I wasn’t sure any lawyer would go against my father. With everything going on between Gerard and me, I doubted I wanted to see his face let alone p discuss this with him.But time was ticking, and it was beginning to weigh on Freya.So I was ready to gamble.After dressing up, and taking breakfast. I reached for the phone and car key.That’s when I noticed the missed calls and several texts from Gerard.Tommy please pick up. Are you still angry with? In sorry. Each sounded more desperate than the other.My stomach tightened. I still didn’t respond. Let him suffer as I had.I opened my door and nearly walked straight into him. Gerard stood there. Close enough I could see the exhaustion in his eyes.He looked
TOMMY..I leaned back into my sofa, kicking off my shoes. “We didn’t end up talking about it again,” I said. “I got carried away with some personal issues.”“Tell me about it.” A faint rustling came from the other end, like she was dusting something.I went rigid. She was carrying too much. How could I add my issues to hers? And mine is something as stupid as love, while hers was life-threatening.Freya’s voice softened. “Tommy… I’m your mother; your problem is also mine.”That was another problem. How could I tell my mother that another man fucked me like a whore, and I’m mad about it?“Come on, tell me, Tommy.” Her voice came again.I rubbed the tip of my nose. "Gerard has been acting differently,” I began, “ever since I began taking the pills.” A beat of silence, and I continued. “I think it’s because I’m not becoming an Alpha.” I held the phone to my ear as I unbuttoned my shirt.“Did he tell you that?”My brow twitched. “Would he tell me that?” I peeled off my shirt.“True,” s
TOMMY..Four days slipped by, and I noticed I had stopped taking the pills.Not dramatically. Not like I had made some grand decision.I just didn’t reach for it. The first night after that night I had told myself I was too tired, and the second night I told myself I would take it the next day. The next day the bottle sat in my drawer like a seal of salvation.My body noticed what my mind had refused to accept. Restlessness came, snatching my sleep. My breath never seemed to fill my lungs, and weakness came too quickly.And the worst was the nausea that came out of nowhere.But still nothing compared to the noise in my head. Nothing was strong enough to pull my thoughts away from Gerard.Well, until my phone buzzed, vibrating my office desk. My eyes sliced to the screen. I slid the call icon and glued it to my ears.“Hey, Tommy.” Freya’s voice came from the other end of the call.Her voice was small—brittle. She always sounded cheerful. Always sounded bubbly.I leaned in. "Freya, are you okay?”



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