Back to Reality

[Charlotte]

As we carefully untangle and clean up in the spare apartment, he shows me his love in all the small ways he cares for me. It's in the feel of his hands as he lifts my hair out of the way to scrub my back or helps me step out of the shower. It's in his eyes as he watches me move, not with lust but with pure adoration. I am not used to anyone seeing me in this way, wanting me in this way as someone worth loving and cherishing.

Andy had only thought of himself and his pleasure. He ignored mine. To him, I was just another thing to use and discard. I don't think I was ever a person to him, not really. I was a challenge, yes, and a prize, but never a person. I was just another something to be won and conquered. After I had the girls and my body changed and my heart turned towards them as any mother would, I became something vile. I was a burden, something tying him down.

Andy was my first lover. If I am lucky, Micah will be my last.

I never knew how deeply I could love and be