Yuki's POVDecember 23rd – Christmas EveI was officially in a panic.Two days until Christmas and I hadn't bought anyone one decent gift. I'd been so busy—working, baking, sewing, gluing buttons onto socks because apparently Suzu's new pastime (don't ask) is now that. And now I was stuck in the middle of a mall that seemed to have Santa's whole village exploded on every inch."Sir, would you like to buy the ballerina nutcracker? Limited edition. Spins and sings," a man in a blindingly green elf getup informed me, jiggling the silver-wrapped horror in my face.I blinked at him. "She sings?"He nodded, much too enthusiastically. "Tchaikovsky's 'Waltz of the Flowers' in four variations."I blinked again. "You're frightening, you know that?"He just grinned like it was a compliment.I gave in and bought the accursed thing. For whom? No idea. Maybe it could be a decent present for . She seemed the type who would find an outrageously melodramatic decoration to her liking.The mall was repl
Yuki's povI blinked. Creed, standing there, unchanging—tall, broad, serious-faced— unmistakably handsome,but his normal glacial mask more temperate now. I looked at the small box he handed me, wrapped in plain silver paper, a foil to my brashly colorful clothing. He spoke no other words; merely stood, his gaze never wavered from mine.For a moment, I was taken aback, unsure what to say. This wasn't me. This wasn't a normal conversation.I hesitated in reaching for the box, the weight resting in my hands. "You. got me a gift?" I asked quietly.He nodded, his gaze still locked on me, regarding me with an intensity that I couldn't explain. "Of course," he said, the tone of his voice and unspoken promise."I—Thanks," I panted, a smile tugging at my mouth, the warmth of the box in my hand.Creed nodded slightly, his face impassive as ever. But there was something about his eyes. Something I couldn't name,but have been occuring for the last few days He had that looked when we were at the
Yuki's pov I brought out the chocolate milk and put everything on the table, trying to keep things from getting any more uncomfortable with Creed. He sat back down, his back straight as ever, but his eyes continually flitting back to me.The snow continued to fall outside, thick and persistent, and I couldn't help but wonder how he was managing the chill. But it was Christmas Eve, and I wasn't going to let things be spoiled. Not now, not after everything.I handed him a cup of hot chocolate and sat beside him. "So, one cookie bite, one sip of chocolate milk. That's the rule. And we've been doing it since I was a kid. My mom—" I caught myself, the words spilling out before I could stop them. "She liked chocolate milk. She could drink three tons of it. We'd sit here, just like this, and discuss anything and everything."I gazed at the mug in my hands, and there was a strange weight in my chest. "We miss you, Muk," I murmured softly, my voice hardly audible.It was bitter and sweet. Chr
Creed's POVThey pulled out a board game. Something ridiculous. I didn't know how to play, and I didn't care to learn. It was enough to just watch. Yu-yu and Lily cheated brazenly, insulted each other with sugar-coated words, and passed the wine back and forth between them like they were having a teen slumber party.And me?I felt like an extraterrestrial. A very pretty, isolated extraterrestrial with icy hands and icier thoughts. But Yu-yu was always looking over. She'd flick me a glance every so often that read, you're here, you're important, and I wanted to punch my head into the closest available wall for how much I needed that glance.Dinner came soon after. The table was tiny and cramped. Roman sat like a king in his fuzzy slippers, and Suzu sat next to him, her tail wagging whenever she was given a treat on the floor.This is the kind of meal that should be followed by a public holiday afterward," Yu-yu stated as she filled her plate with stuffing. "I think work should never op
Yuki's POV"Stop rolling over, hell, Yuki!"I froze in mid-roll, legs trapped in my satin penguin pajamas, rosy bonnet cocked drunkenly. Lily glared at me from across my bed like she was going to strangle me with her peppermint candy cane socks."What's wrong with you?" she snarled, tugging her blanket around her neck.I hesitated, then exhaled dramatically. "Okay, so like—don't freak out—but Creed asked me on a date."Lily blinked. "What?"I flopped onto my side, curling my fists under my face like a Disney princess in peril. "He asked me. Like, in words. Actual ones. Not a joke. I hope."Lily sat up slowly, her eyes narrowed at me like she was trying to stare through my soul. "Wait. When?""Last night. We were washing the dishes. He had this whole warm, sleepy face, and then—bam, 'Go out with me on a date, Miss Roman.' Like that."She glared at me. "And what did you reply?"I laughed. "I said something just absolutely precious like, 'Let's just say I came prepared.'"Lily shook her
CREED'S POVJanuary 9th. Monday. The type of Monday that tasted of regret and cold coffee, eating at the back of my mind.The holidays were a blur—Zara's silence, my guilt, YuYu's kiss.God, YuYu.I had not heard from Zara for two weeks. Nothing. No text, even a suggestion that one was on its way. She was done trying, and truthfully? I didn't blame her one bit. I led her on, made her believe there was a chance when there wasn't. I gave her hope there was something left when I knew already I'd given what little I had to someone else—or at least, whatever remained of it.It was my fault. I shouldn't have treated her like that. Zara wasn't just some girl I'd once loved—she was a friend. A damn good one. Seeing someone like her get hurt… killed something within me.And now I was going to do the same to YuYu.Except this was worse. Because I didn't just lead YuYu on—I wanted her. I missed her. I yearned for her in a way that was irrational and all-consuming. I hadn't seen her in weeks eith
ZARA'S POVI was done waiting.Done sitting in my bedroom like some lovesick goof while the entire world went on as if all was right with the world. Done listening to my mother's stage-whisper motivational speeches and my friends' babying phone calls. Done watching Creed just sort of go on like I had meant nothing to him.He ended the engagement like a business. Like nothing was important.And nobody batted an eye.But I did.Couldn't. Wouldn't.So I grabbed my bag, put on my best coat — the one Creed'd always say made me look "like trouble in heels" — and out the door I went. I wasn't really sure what I'd do until I was standing in front of the tall glass building with CREED X TECHNOLOGIES in silver letters above the door.I took a deep breath.Today wouldn't be about crying.It wouldn't be memories.It would be about regaining control."Good morning, Miss Zara," the receptionist chirped, clearly taken aback to see me.I smiled, as if I didn't care about the covert glances people th
Zara's POV I opened the door and was greeted at once with the reek of smoke, cheap alcohol, and some pungent unknownness. The room was dimly lit with mismatched sofas, flashing screens, bent heads over keyboards, and billows of smoke suspended in mid-air.People in hoodies, ripped jeans, half of whom had tattoos crawling up their necks and faces, all scowling through the fog at their screens like vultures over a carcass.God, this place is vile.I straightened my shoulders, clinging to what was left of my dignity. I didn't want to be inhaling this air for more than a decade."Looking for someone, sweetheart?" a greasy-eyed man with a lip ring sneered from the corner."I need Zed."I was crisp and icy in tone.A hum ran over the tables around us. A few of them looked at one another before one of them pointed down the back. "Booth twelve."I strode across tangled wires and trash-covered soda cans, heels clicking on the filthy floor, hating every second.There, in the corner booth, sat
Yuki's pov The flying part wasn't scary.I wasn't terrified of airplanes.I wasn't terrified of turbulent flight or height or any of that.I was terrified of beginning again.Terrified of seeing myself.For three weeks — almost four — I had done nothing but rot. Fault myself. Cry. Break things. Apologize to specters.That was enough.I couldn't keep going on like that.Mom wouldn't have wanted me to go on like that.Grandpa wouldn't either, even if he didn't always recall me.I stared out the plane window, clouds streaking across the horizon like wet paint, my chest aching.Memories ripped at me — Creed's voice, his smile, then the shock in his eyes.Grandpa's laugh, the way he used to call me his "boy."Lily's hugs.Small shattered pieces of my life slipping further and further away from me as the plane flew east.I bit my lip hard enough to taste blood.No more tears.No more pity parties.I can do this.This is my new start.Mom would be proud.I hugged myself hard, wrapped the th
Lily's POVThe ride to the airport was too short.I continued to sneak glances at Yuki beside me, soaking him in—his dark, messy hair, the nervous drum of his fingers against his jeans, the nervous bounce of his knee.As if if I stared long enough, I could burn the picture of him into my head and never forget.He caught me staring and smiled weakly. "What?""Nothing," I said quickly, attempting to smile. "Just. don't chicken out."He grinned, but it wasn't natural. "Too late to run now, huh?""Way too late," I taunted softly.The problem was, I wished he would run.I wanted to bang the car doors closed, drive us somewhere a thousand miles from here, and wish he wouldn't be going.But I couldn't.He had to go.He needed this new start.Even if it killed me.We pulled up to Departures. Yuki opened his backpack, fiddling with the straps like they were the most fascinating thing on earth.I pulled up and turned off the engine.We sat there, neither of us moving, for a moment.Then Yuki le
Yuki's POV"You're leaving today."Lily's voice was gentle, but it hit me like a punch.I crouched at the foot of the bed, staring at the carpet. My fingers tapped on the frayed cuff of my jacket, pulling at loose threads as if I could somehow roll back time and stay here in this cramped safe room, stuck forever.I didn't look at her. I didn't move."Yuki," she said once more, coming to kneel beside me. Her hand lay lightly on my knee. "Then I think it's time you saw your grandfather."I shook my head."No, it's not," I grunted. "I'm not ready."She let out a tired, aching sigh, the kind you do when you don't want to cry. "You've been here for a month. You're better now. You're stronger, plus do you really plan on going halfway across the world and not seeing him before you go.""Stronger?" I laughed roughly. "I'm still a mess.""You're recovering," she amended. "And you have to — you'd just have to visit him before you go."Her words sliced through me more deeply than I cared to ackn
Creed's POVI slammed the office door shut so hard that the walls vibrated. The secretary outside yelped as if she thought the damn ceiling was going to come crashing down."Get me the quarterly reports," I barked. "Now."She rushed out of her seat, almost falling over her own feet. Pitiful.I paced in front of my office like a wild animal in a cage, blood pumping hotter each passing second. All of this was pissing me off every day now. The terrible coffee. The creeping elevators. The godforsaken interns' breathing out in the corridor.Five weeks. Five weeks since I let go of that imposter, yet my heart clenched at the thought of her…of him !Anger boiled in my veins over and over but today a particular anger took over me, one o couldn't explain but already had ties to That imposter I didn't need him and I wasn't gay!There was no going back for me. And I felt the whole office knew that from the very moment I resumed, a week ago Besides they couldn't blame me for their incompeten
Lily's POVToday became tomorrow.Tomorrow became next week.Next week became three endless weeks.And somehow, despite all the promises I made to myself, I still hadn't met Yuki.I don't even know how it all tightened up like that — how every small detail became so hard. Between caring for Grandpa Roman, going back and forth to the hospital for meds, doctor appointments, dealing with his therapies — life had gotten tangled around my neck with no mercy. I didn't have space to catch my breath, didn't have time to think. And amidst all of this, something gnawed at me:Yuki trusted me.I had been entrusted with Grandpa Roman — with one of the only people he loved — and deep, way down deep inside me, I knew I didn't want to let him down.But today. today was different. Today was the day. I was really going to fix all of it.I was going to go see him, apologize for whatever stupidness drove us apart, tell him about what he'd seen that day with Dan, tell him everything.Dan.He officially m
Zara's POVThere's regret.There's pain.And then there's anger — thick, bitter, wild anger.I didn't deserve this.I was the last person in this damn world that deserved this.He wasn't supposed to push me away.He wasn't supposed to treat me like… like I was nothing.I was supposed to be by his side.I was supposed to be the one to fix him. To save him.I paced back and forth in my chamber, my hands in my palms, trying to contain the storm raging inside me.The walls were closing in, the air heavy, and my mind was filled with his face. His eyes. His lips. His voice when he'd instructed me to leave.I hated him.I loved him.God — I loved him.I couldn't take it anymore."Call Zed," I barked at one of my servants.She stopped. "Now, ma'am?""Now!" I screamed.My hands were trembling. My heart thudding. I was unraveling, going crazy and I didn't give a damn anymore.Within minutes, Zed arrived.Tall, dark, as calm as ever.He always had been.The man who took orders quietly, who had a
Yuki's POVTwo weeks.That's 20,160 minutes. Twenty thousand, one hundred and sixty minutes of pure torture.I'd texted Creed so much. Too much, really. Sorrys I couldn't phrase correctly first, things I didn't have the courage to tell him out loud before, little things I knew he didn't want to hear. I texted anyway, hoping for a crumb of a reply.But there was nothing. No dot. No word. No fucking breath.So I made up my mind. I'd made it up the day everything went wrong—the day everything went in the opposite direction of my plans, like some sick cosmic joke. I was leaving New York. Done. Finito. Finished.Lily hadn't called me for two weeks either. It was as if my world had burst wide open, and I stood in the middle of a great emptiness. Grandpa Roman… two weeks of nothing from him too. Two weeks of not hearing his shaking, bewildered voice, of not chasing after him when he got me mixed up with my mother. Two weeks alone, tearing myself apart, living on my own regrets.I was complet
Creed's POVTwo weeks.Fourteen days.20,160 minutes.I knew because I counted them. Every goddamn one of them.It's ironic that you know exactly how you feel about someone after 20,160 minutes of silence. No calls. No texts. No presence. Nothing. Just a void where they used to be. The only sound was my own breathing and it had started to get under my skin. My house was worse than my head. Clothes scattered everywhere. Empty bottles. Shattered frames. A grime mountain I could barely bring myself to look at — and still, I hung around there, festering amidst it like some wounded beast.I hadn't left for the office in two weeks. Fourteen days. No one had tried calling anymore. No one knocked. Not since the third day when I ripped the doorbell off of the wall and hurled it out of the window. My stubble was heavy. I barely recognized the face staring back at me in the mirror the occasional time I made the mistake of looking.I flopped onto the bed, blankets that smelled like sweat and guil
Yuki's POVI did not know what to do with this. With him. With this. miserable life. Grandpa Roman was bleeding — his hand was slashed open, red spreading onto the floor and Lily's voice disintegrating in horror as she ran left and right. Everything appeared to be unfolding too fast and too slow all at once. The glass, the blood, Suzu's frantic barking, the aching in my chest. My head was an absolute, overwhelming void."Yuki! Grab the first aid kit, now!" Lily screamed.My legs barely worked. I was stuck there, agape, like my brain couldn't wrap around it. Like I couldn't wrap my head around how fast everything disintegrated. One second he was just standing there, screaming at my mother, the next glass was shrouding everything, blood on his wrist, and the fragile reality I was pretending to hold together had broken completely."Yuki!"I jumped and ran for the kit.Lily was pressing a towel over his palm, speaking reassuringly to him but he wouldn't stop struggling, calling out for la