LOGINETHAN'S POV
I dropped by back pack on the gravel floor with a loud thud, as I struggled into the kitchen to clear my dried throat. I was tired and exhausted, my clothes reck of dirt, seems like I fell into a pit of mud. It was 11PM mid—night already and I was just coming back from school. I dropped the cup on the table with a loud thud, as I ached my back bone. “You’re just coming back?” A voice cut through the thick silence of the kitchen like a blade, sharp and unexpected. I froze, my hand still clutching the glass of water I’d just slammed onto the table. My back stiffened, muscles tightening as I recognized the tone—Raymond. Of course, it was him. My Dad. I turned slowly, my sneakers squeaking faintly against the tile floor, still damp from the mud caked on the soles. My eyes met his—dark, cold, and unreadable. The dim overhead light cast shadows across his face, making him look older than he was, but the alcohol in his hand reminded me of the man he’d become since Mom left. Pathetic. “What does that have to do with you?” I shot back, my voice low but laced with venom. I didn’t bother hiding the disdain in my tone. I wanted him to feel it, to know how much I resented him. He didn’t flinch. Just stood there, his broad shoulders slightly hunched. The faint smell of alcohol clung to him, mingling with the stale air of the house. For a moment, neither of us spoke. The only sound was the faint hum of the refrigerator and the occasional drip of water from my clothes onto the floor. “I was worried about you,” he finally said, his voice softer than I expected. That only made me angrier. I let out a bitter laugh, the sound harsh and unnatural in the quiet room. “And I’ll advise you don’t be. Why the fuck are you worried about me?” The words tore out of me, raw and unfiltered. He didn’t respond. Just turned away, his footsteps heavy as he walked to the freezer and pulled out two more bottles. The clink of glass against glass was the only sound as he left the kitchen without another word. I watched him go, my hands clenched into fists at my sides. The man was a shadow of what he used to be—broken, defeated. And for some reason, that made me hate him even more. The kitchen felt emptier without him there, but the tension lingered like a storm cloud waiting to burst. I sighed, running a hand through my damp hair before turning to the stove. The pots were still warm, and I lifted the lid to find a half-eaten meal inside. "Helen was here," I thought bitterly. Her presence was everywhere lately—her perfume lingering in the air, her laughter echoing down the hallways whenever she visited. My father’s girlfriend. The woman who thought she could replace Mom. As if. I scooped some of the leftover cavatelli onto a plate, the steam rising and carrying the faint scent of garlic and tomatoes. My stomach growled, but I barely noticed. Food was the last thing on my mind. With my plate in hand, I headed to my room, my sneakers leaving faint muddy prints on the hardwood floor. I slammed my bedroom door shut behind me, the sound echoing through the empty hallway. My bed groaned as I flopped onto it, the springs protesting under my weight. I stared up at the ceiling, my mind racing despite the exhaustion weighing me down. Professor Kai. His name popped into my head unbidden, and I couldn’t help but smile despite myself. His image floated in my mind—that perfect jawline, those sparkling white teeth, that effortless charm that seemed to draw everyone in. There was something about him that made me curious, wondering what lay beneath that polished exterior. It made me wonder if he's Gay. Because I'm not! My thoughts drifted to Karina, my girlfriend—or maybe ex-girlfriend by now. I’d forgotten to call her again tonight, and I knew she’d be pissed. But honestly, I didn’t have the energy to deal with her drama right now. If she wanted to break up, fine. We both had enough going on without adding relationship problems to the mix. I was straight, well I think I am, but lately, have being sexually and emotionally drawn to a man. Professor Kai I closed my eyes, letting my mind wander back to Professor Kai. Today had been a small victory—he’d spoken to me today, and I wished he'll remember my name next time. It wasn’t much, but it was progress. Just a little more effort, and maybe I could get closer to him, figure out what made him tick. And, and.... ~NEXT MORNING~ "Ehan..." Jordan tapped my shoulder, and I snapped up from my sleep, wiping the haze from my eyes. The fluorescent lights of the classroom buzzed overhead, casting a harsh glow on the rows of desks. My neck ached from the awkward angle I’d been dozing in, and my cheeks burned with embarrassment. Again. I’d fallen asleep in class—again. "Yeah?" I mumbled, my voice still thick with sleep. Jordan held out a neatly folded stack of papers. "Can you submit this to Professor Kai's office? I really need to get back to the ICT room." My ears perked up at the mention of Professor Kai. My heart skipped a beat, and I felt a small thrill run through me. Just yesterday, our paths had crossed at the back of the teacher department. And now, fate was handing me another chance to see him. "You don’t want to?" Jordan asked when I didn’t respond immediately. I snatched the papers from his hand before he could change his mind. "You don’t have to worry. I’ll submit it," I said, my voice steadier than I expected. I grabbed my backpack, already feeling a strange mix of excitement and nerves bubbling in my chest. The hallway of the professor's office was quiet, the kind of stillness that only comes when classes are in full swing. The faint hum of the air conditioning units filled the air, punctuated by the occasional distant clatter of footsteps or the squeak of a door. My own footsteps echoed softly against the polished floor as I made my way to find professor Kai office . Today, I’d chosen my outfit carefully—a black shirt that hugged my frame just right and brown pants that I thought made me look put together. I’d even spent an extra few minutes on my hair this morning, though that effort was now probably ruined by my stupid nap. Still, I wanted to look good—just in case. At the end of the hall, I spotted Professor Kai’s office. My pace quickened, my heart beating a little faster with every step. But as I got closer, I froze. There were sounds coming from inside. Strange sounds. Low grunts, sharp gasps, and… the clap of skin on skin. My stomach dropped. I didn’t need to be a genius to figure out what was happening. Ongoing sex? In Professor Kai’s office? My breath caught in my throat, and I felt a sudden, sharp pang of something I couldn’t quite name. Jealousy? Hurt? Betrayal? I leaned against the wall, pressing my back into the cool plaster as if it could steady me. My mind raced, conjuring images I didn’t want to see—Professor Kai with a woman, his hands roaming over her body, his lips pressed to hers. Tears prickled at the corners of my eyes, but I blinked them away furiously. I wasn’t going to cry over this. I wasn’t. That’s when I noticed the door. It was slightly ajar, not fully closed. A dim of light spilled out into the hallway, and I could hear the sounds more clearly now. My curiosity took the better off me. I know I shouldn’t look. But the temptation was too strong. I reached out, my fingers trembling as they brushed against the edge of the door. Slowly, carefully, I pushed it open just enough to peek inside. What I saw made my whole body freeze. It wasn’t a woman. Professor Kai was with another man, a tall, lean figure with dark hair—pinned against the desk. Professor Kai’s hands gripped the man’s hips, pulling him closer with each thrust. The other man’s face was turned away, but his gasps were unmistakable, his fingers gripping the edge of the desk so hard his knuckles turned white. My breath hitched. Professor Kai is Gay!?ETHAN’S POVI slipped into the lecture hall twenty minutes early, picked my usual spot, very last row in the tightest corner, and tried to disappear. My hands were still shaking from the morning, from the stranger’s gray eyes that looked too much like Kai’s, from the way my heart kept ricocheting between hope and dread. I pulled my books out slowly, lining them up like armor, my hoodie pulled low over my face.Students started pouring in, laughing, gossiping, alive in a way I hadn’t felt in days. I kept my gaze on my desk, tracing the carved initials of people who didn’t have to wonder if the man they loved was a killer.Then the door opened again, and I felt him before I saw him.That same tall frame from the quad filled the doorway, scanning the room with lazy confidence. His eyes landed on me instantly. A slow smile curved his mouth, friendly, warm, and completely disarming.My stomach flipped, instantly.He started walking straight toward me.No, No no no.I dropped my gaze to m
ETHAN’S POV I woke up tasting salt and regret.The morning light slicing through the blinds felt like punishment. My eyes were swollen, crusty from crying all night, and I was still wearing Kai’s clothes: his oversized black T-shirt and the gray sweat-shorts that uses to smell like safety and now just smelled like goodbye.I hadn’t taken them off. I’d stumbled through the front door last night, ignored my dad’s startled “Ethan?” and locked myself in my room. Then I’d curled into a ball on the bed and cried until my throat was raw and my pillow was soaked. I kept checking my phone every thirty seconds, waiting for something, anything: a text, a call, a single word that said come back. But there was nothing. The screen stayed cruelly blank.He hadn’t followed me. He’d stood in that garage and watched me walk away without moving a muscle. Maybe he’d been relieved. Maybe the second I accused him of being a coward, maybe when I had looked him in the eye and used a cursed words.I dr
ETHAN’S POV I was sitting cross-legged on the edge of the bed when he stepped out of the bathroom, towel slung low on his hips, another one rubbing roughly through his wet hair. Water still traced the lines of his chest, sliding over the ridges of muscle and the stark white bandage that covered his side. He looked unfairly beautiful, dangerous in that quiet way that used to make my knees weak, but now, it just made my stomach knot. “You good?” he asked, voice soft, careful. I swallowed. “I’m fine. Just… waiting for you.” He gave me a small, crooked smile and reached for a black T-shirt from the dresser. The movement was quick, practiced, but I still caught a flash of the scar beneath the bandage before the fabric covered it. But I never saw a scar on his chest. My breath hitched, and he noticed. Of course he noticed. “Come here,” he murmured, opening his arms. I went without thinking. I always did. He lifted me easily, hands sliding under my thighs, settling me against his
ETHAN’S POV The walk to the park had been torture.We moved side by side, but it felt like there was a canyon between us. Kai kept his hands clasped behind his back, pace slow and measured, matching my shorter strides without seeming to try. I kept stealing glances at him: the sharp line of his jaw, the way the wind tugged at his dark hair, the blank mask he’d worn since the pizza last night. Every time our eyes almost met I jerked mine away, heart racing like I’d been caught doing something unforgivable.Which, in a way, I had.The park wasn’t crowded. A few kids shrieked on the swings, a couple walked a dog, an old man fed pigeons. Normal life. It made the silence between us feel even heavier.“Should we get ice cream?” Kai asked suddenly, nodding toward the pastel-colored van parked under the oaks.The question was so ordinary it threw me. “Uh… yeah. Sure.”We walked over. I ordered vanilla with strawberry topping because my brain couldn’t handle decisions right now. The lady beh
ETHAN'S POV“Ethan?” Kai’s voice, low and muffled through the door. “Baby, it’s me.”Relief and panic crashed together so violently I almost threw up.My palms were slick with sweat. My borrowed shorts had dark brown streaks across the thigh where I’d wiped my fingers. I could smell the metallic tang of old blood on my skin.Another knock, gentle. “Ethan? You okay?”“Coming!” I croaked, voice cracking. I sounded guilty as hell.I bolted for the bathroom, turned the faucet on full blast, splashed cold water on my face, scrubbed my hands until they stung. The mirror showed a wild-eyed boy with flushed cheeks and trembling lips. I looked like I’d just committed a crime.Because I kind of had.I grabbed a towel, dried my face, tried to slow my breathing. Inhale four, hold four, exhale four. It didn’t work.The knock came again, softer. “Baby, open the door. You’re scaring me.”I forced my legs to move. Every step felt like walking through quicksand. I reached the door, hands shaking so ba
ETHAN’S POV I curled my toes, at the wild sensation of this, then I felt his hands cupped my cheek. "Look at me, Ethan."He said calmly, as he moved my face to his sides."I said you should go. You don't have to worry about me."I muttred.He sighed. "I’m coming back. I’m not disappearing again. I’m not leaving you. Do you hear me?” I wanted to believe him. God, I wanted to. But all I could see was the way he’d walked out to that balcony, the way he’d hidden the phone, the way he was dressing like a man preparing for war instead of a Tuesday afternoon. I nodded anyway, because I didn’t have the strength to fight. "If you say so."I muttred.He kissed my forehead, hard and desperate, then my lips, tasting my tears. “Few minutes, I'll be back” he whispered again. “Lock the door behind me. Don’t open for anyone but me.” He got off the bed, as he head to the door, and then he was gone. The door clicked shut. I stayed on the bed long after the door clicked shut, curled on m







