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Chapter 9

مؤلف: Sunecho
Grandma got on the train back to the village with my urn in her arms.

I floated next to her.

The fields ran past the window in long green sweeps, and her white hair lifted in the breeze.

I remembered that when I was little, back before I got so weak, the whole family used to ride the train out here together, and the view had looked just like this.

Grandma rested the urn on her knees and held it carefully.

The train rocked for over four hours, and she barely moved.

By the time we reached the town
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  • Parents’ Regret After I Died for My Sister   Chapter 9

    Grandma got on the train back to the village with my urn in her arms.I floated next to her.The fields ran past the window in long green sweeps, and her white hair lifted in the breeze.I remembered that when I was little, back before I got so weak, the whole family used to ride the train out here together, and the view had looked just like this.Grandma rested the urn on her knees and held it carefully.The train rocked for over four hours, and she barely moved.By the time we reached the town, it was already dark.Grandma didn't turn on a light. She felt her way into the old wooden house she'd lived in for forty years and struck a match.“Elena.” She said it softly, as if she were checking whether someone else were still in the room.She set the urn on the mantel, then dug a white candle out of a cabinet, lit it, and stood it next to the urn.The flame wavered, then steadied.She sat down in the rocking chair in front of the fireplace and just looked at the urn and the candle.She l

  • Parents’ Regret After I Died for My Sister   Chapter 8

    Grandma used her pension to buy a coffin, a thin and light one.She said she didn't want me to cost my parents another cent.She dressed me in a white dress with little daisies embroidered along the collar.Her hands were rough, but her touch was so gentle, as if I were only sleeping and she were afraid to wake me.Mom tried to come in and help, but Grandma blocked her at the door.“Get out.”She kept working on me with her head down, never glancing at Mom once.Mom stood in the doorway, lips moving without sound.Her hand pressed against the door frame until the knuckles turned white, and then she slid down it slowly until she was crouched in the hallway with her face in her knees.Iris had been carrying around the rag doll I'd made for her.I hadn't done a good job on it. The eyes were crooked and the mouth was slanted. Iris was disgusted at first, yet later she carried it everywhere.Her eyes were swollen and her cheeks were streaked with dried tears, but she wasn't crying anymore.

  • Parents’ Regret After I Died for My Sister   Chapter 7

    The doorbell rang.It was Mrs. Collins from next door, coming to borrow something, and Mom answered the door with red eyes.“My God, what happened?”She saw me in Grandma's arms, and her gaze hitched.“Elena? Don't tell me—”Mom looked up sharply with bloodshot eyes.Mrs. Collins patted her shoulder.“She was always frail. It's not your fault she didn't make it.”“Things will be easier for you now.”“Just yesterday you were telling me Elena was here to collect on a debt from a past life.”“Get out.”Mom's eyes turned vicious.Mrs. Collins's lips moved, and then her eyes drifted to Grandma.“Out.”It was Grandma who had spoken.“Now,” she said. “Out.”The look in her eyes finally shut Mrs. Collins up, and she backed sheepishly out the door.The moment it closed, Mom collapsed, as if every ounce of strength had been drained out of her.“It was me…”“Elena must have heard me say things like that, and she must have thought I didn't want her anymore. That's why she left.”Dad pulled her aga

  • Parents’ Regret After I Died for My Sister   Chapter 6

    I stayed standing next to them.Grandma woke up and stared blankly at the ceiling.Her lips moved without sound.She was calling my name. Elena.I lay down beside her and rested against her chest, the way I used to when I was little.The smell of her soap filled my nose.Something warm spread through me.“It's not your fault, Grandma. I know you really wanted to be here for my birthday.”Iris was still in her pale blue hospital gown, barefoot, with her hair loose on her shoulders and her face whiter than mine.Wasn't she cold? She wasn't even better yet.I wanted to ask, but she couldn't hear me.Mom had to take care of Grandma, so she let Dad hold me.Iris watched my body in his arms for a long time, and then she said quietly,“You lied to me, sis.”“You said we'd eat the strawberry cake together.”“I didn't lie. I had the candles ready that day, but you were asleep.”“I left a little present for you anyway.”I reached out to touch her hair.My hand went through it, the way it would h

  • Parents’ Regret After I Died for My Sister   Chapter 5

    “Elena.”Mom let go of Iris and stumbled forward, staring at me as if she couldn't believe what she was seeing.Iris peeked out from behind her, eyes huge, and my curled-up body was reflected in them.“Elena?”Her voice was as thin as a thread of spider silk about to snap, trembling in the air.No one answered her.The small body on the blanket didn't move, didn't breathe.Mom knelt down and touched my cheek.It was stone cold, cold all the way through.Her hand jerked back.She froze in place, like a statue someone had broken.“No.” She shook her head faster and faster, as if she were trying to throw the thought out of her skull. “No, no. Jason, come look. Is she sick? Is Elena sick?”Dad rushed over and pushed her aside.He held his hand near my nose, hesitating.His hand was shaking violently.He didn't believe it, so he laid his head on my chest, trying to hear a heartbeat.There was nothing.He collapsed onto the floor, muttering, “She really was hurting.”He covered his face and

  • Parents’ Regret After I Died for My Sister   Chapter 4

    Grandma stood in the hallway with a small cross clutched in her hand.“Where's Elena?” she asked again.Mom's shoulders flinched, and she glanced back at Dad.He came out of the kitchen.“Don't worry, Mom. Elena's fine.”“She's been acting out lately. She made a scene last night, we had words, and now she's reflecting in the storage room. It's been cleaned up. It has a bed and blankets. It's basically a little bedroom.”I looked down at the dirt stains on my dress.Dad hadn't noticed that there was only a roll of grimy old blankets on that floor.“Reflecting?”“Mom, Elena really was throwing a fit last night—”Mom started to defend it, but Grandma cut her off with a look.“She's a child.” Her voice rose. “It was her twelfth birthday, and you locked her in the storage room?”“Iris was sick. We were going to make it up to her today.”Mom's voice shrank with guilt.Grandma paced the hallway.“Alina came to me this morning,” she said, her voice lower now. “She told me I had to come and be

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