Chapter 1

Kahihiyan

"CaiDan, spotted at Mt. Batulao."

"Don't miss this kilig scene from CaiDan's latest movie, Far Awake."

"Check Out: CaiDan Mall Show Schedules."

Heather was browsing on the internet when she heard three knocks on the door. Sumilip si Yaya Belen sa maliit na siwang ng pinto. Heather quickly closed her laptop and sat straight on the bed.

"Yaya..."

Pumasok si Yaya Belen sa loob ng kwarto niya at hinaplos ng marahan ang buhok niya.

"Handan na ang agahan. Nandoon na rin ang Mommy at Daddy mo. Halika na," she urged Heather and extended her other hand to her.

"What about Ate Driana? Is she there, too?" Heather asked in a quite nervous voice. Yaya Belen smiled tightly before nodding. Wala sa sariling napatingin si Heather sa nakasarado niyang laptop.

"Mas pipiliin mo bang manatili na lang ditto at basahin ang mga balitang ‘yan kaysa makasamang kumain sa hapag ang Ate at magulang mo?" tanong ni Yaya sa kaniya. Alam niyang nasasaktan si Heather sa mga binabasa niya. Gawain na ito ng dalaga noon pa kaya nalulngkot siya para rito. She wanted to distract her somehow.

Heather, who would rather read the news about her actor boyfriend than dining with her half-sister looked up to her and spoke, "You know how Ate Driana is when I'm around. I guess, I'll have my breakfast here, Yaya." She forced a smile and put her laptop to its drawer.

"Sigurado ka?" paniniguro ng mayordoma.

"Yes, Yaya,” ani Heather habang iniisip ang posibleng mangyari kapag sumali siya. Tiyak na magkakaroon lang ng tensyon. Kung hindi siya sasalo sa mga ito, magiging masaya at tahimik ang agahan nila. Heather doesn't want to hear their insults.

Tumango si Yaya Belen at hinayaan na lang siya. "Okay. Ihahanda ko ang pagkain—"

Both of their attentions were stolen by a subtle knock from the door. "Ma'am Heather, pinapatawag ka po ni Sir Diego. Ngayon daw po ang alis niya papuntang Cebu kaya gusto niyang kumpleto at sabay-sabay kayong kakain," a maid said at the other side of the door. The two looked at each other. Belen looked at Heather convincingly and nodded her head.

Wala ng nagawa si Heather kundi bumuntong-hininga, isuot ang indoor slippers at sabay sila ni Yaya na lumabas ng kwarto. Heather politely nodded at the maid who's politely waiting for her.

"Okay. Give me a sec." Inakbayan siya ni Yaya Belen at iginiya patungong pintuan.

"Come on."

"I will be gone for a week for a Doctor's Convention in Cebu. I expect everyone to get along well. Ayokong may mabalitaang gulo o away dito sa bahay while I'm away. Nagkakaintindihan ba tayo?" Diego, Heather’s Dad announced it in front of everyone pero iniiisip ni Heather na para sa kaniya ang babalang iyon. Mas lalo niya lang napatunayang tama ang hinala nang tapunan siya nito ng nagbabantang tingin. But on Diego’s perspective, he was eyeing Heather worriedly. He knew that his wife and daughter were not so nice with Heather.

Heather suddenly wanted to shrink away. Hindi naman palaaway si Heather ngunit kapag nariyan ang Ate Driana niya, nagkakaroon ng sagutan at minsan, mas Malala pa. She always gets into trouble because of her sister but she never grouched. Lagi niyang iniisip ang lugar sa pamilya.

"I'm still wandering kung bakit hindi ako naimbitahan sa convention na iyan," Julia, Heather’s Mom murmured while slicing her pancake.

"Hon, the convention is for heart doctors only," natatawang sagot ni Diego.

"Oh, right." Julia chuckled.

Heather’s father, Diego Dela Cerna is a well-known Cardiologist. Isa siya sa best heart doctors of the Philippines —based on a popular site and no one can disagree. Being a cardiologist for twenty years, marami ng award na natanggap si Diego sa pagiging doktor niya. One reason why the name Dela Cerna is remarkable in the field of doctors.

"Don't worry, honey. Next month, may event sa Batangas. Doctors of any kinds are invited. Doon, sabay tayong pupunta."

"Can I come too? I'm graduating naman na, Daddy," Singit ni Driana, ang nakatatandang kapatid ni Heather.

Awtomatiko napalingon sa kanya si Heather dahil nagsalita siya. Pinagtaasan siya nito ng kaliwang kilay. Heather looked down.

"Sure thing, anak. Para na rin maipakilala kita sa mga kaibigan kong Orthopedic. I'm sure you'll learn a lot from them."

"Thanks, Dad!" Tumayo si Driana at niyakap ang ama. Nagtama ang mata nila ni Julia at pareho silang ngumiti.

"Sali ako." Tumayo si Julia at nakiyakap na rin. Pinagtaasan si Heather ng kilay ni ama.

"Heather. Care to join us?" He spread his arms even though it's already full of Driana and Julia. Tumayo si Heather at lumapit sa kanila.

Medyo malayo ang puwesto niya kay Diego at sa haba ng mesa, it took her a few steps to get close to him. Nasa harapan na nila si Heather nang kumalas sa yakapan si Driana followed by her Mom. Heather’s face fell pero pilit niya iyong isinalo. She acted like it’s okay at calmly went back to her seat. Nagtama ang mga mata nila ni Daddy niya. He's looking at her apologetically. She smiled to say it's okay. Nakita ni Heather mula sa sulok ng mata niya ang pag-irap ni Driana sa gilid.

"Heather, it’s been two years since you graduated tourism. Kailan mo balak bumiyahe?" pormal na tanong sa kaniya ng ina. Not even an ounce of concern. It's like she just said that to make our breakfast not too quiet.

"Wala pa po akong balak, bumiyahe."

"Right. You still need to undergo an evaluation. Nakalimutan ko. Kailan mo balak sumali sa evaluation kung ganoon?" Taas-noo siyang tiningnan ni Julia. Julia loved that scared emotion on Heather’s face. Mabuti naman itong bata ngunit hindi niya lang talaga mapigilan ang pagkulo ng dugo rito. Ang mukha ni Heather at ang presensiya niya ay nagpapaalala kay Julia sa masakit nilang nakaraan.

Parang gusto na lang magpalamon sa lupa dahil sa paraan ng pagtingin nito sa kaniya. It's too intimidating.

"I-I'm not...I'm not planning on attending the evaluation this year, Mom," her voice gets smaller and smaller as time passes.

"Ano?" she sound offended. Heather braced herself for her never ending lecture. "Ilang taon ba ang palalagpasin mo bago ka maging flight attendant? Mauunahan ka pa nitong ate mong magka-trabaho. Sampung taon siyang nag-aral tapos ikaw, apat na taon lang. Pero mauunahan ka pa niyang kumita." Mahinang tinawag ni Diego ang pangalan ng ina niya pero hindi nito pinansin ang asawa.

"Ano? Habang-buhay ka na lang dedepende sa'min ng Daddy mo? Para saan pa't pinag-aral ka namin?"

"Julia, please stop." Pero hindi nagpatinag si Julia.

"What is this all about? Your boyfriend? Didn't I told you to break up with him? Noong una, inaamin ko, naisip kong magandang impluwensya ang lalaking iyon sa’yo—sa'tin. But clearly, he'd been nothing but a dilemma! Nagiging hadlang siya diyan sa pagiging FA mo at kung magtatagal pa ang relasyon ninyo, everybody will know about you and it will be a big disgrace to the family!" Napaigtad si Heather nang lumakas ang boses niya. Madalas siyang sigawan ng ina pero natatakot pa rin siya sa tuwing nangyayari ‘yon. "Kahihiyan na nga ang pagkabuhay mo, dadagdagan mo pa!"

"Julia, that's enough!" Diego's voice sounded like a thunder invading the whole house. Pati si Driana ay napatalon sa lakas nito. Mas lalong ibinaba ni Heather ang tingin. If I can just hide herself underneath the table, kanina niya pa ginawa sa kahihiyan.

"No!" Tinuro niya si Heather. "You keep on defending this abhorrence! Wala siyang ginawang tama, Diego. Ni isa, wala! I shouldn't have agreed for her to take tourism. It's a disgrace to the family tradition! Everything she does is a disgrace. She, herself is a disgrace. An abomination. Bastarda!"

A loud shattering sound echoed the whole room. Napatili ang lahat sa narinig. Heather’s lips were trembling, so does her hands and feet. Ramdam niya ang nagbabadyang pagtulo ng luha. She looked up and saw her Dad facing her Mom angrily. Lumipat ang paningin niya sa sahig, where the broken pieces of the plate lies.  

"One more word about Heather and you will not like me very much." Sa sinabing iyon ng ama niya, mariin niyang ipinikit ang mga mata at sinisi sa sarili ang pagsasagutan ngayon ng mga magulang niya.

"P-Pinagbabantaan mo ba ako? I'm your wife, Diego!" hindi makapaniwalang sabi ni Julia.

"And that kid you called bastard is my child," nanggigigil na usal nito bago umalis ng dining area.

Heather slightly opened her eyes and immediately looked down again to avoid her Mom's menacing stare. Julia tsked before storming out.

Dahan-dahan siyang nag-angat ng tingin na agad niyang pinagsisihan.

Driana's gaze met hers. She walked towards Heather while crossing her arms.

"Ano? Masaya ka na? Nag-away na naman si Mommy at Daddy dahil sayo." Umiling-iling ito. "Alam mo, ever since na dinala ka rito ng bugaw mong nanay, wala ng magandang nangyari dito sa bahay. Walang kang ibang dala kundi kamalasan. Kahihiyan."

Heather looked down once again and forced to level her breathing. Inabot niya ang tubig at uminom doon.

Tears started flowing down her cheeks. Kinagat niya ang labi para pigilan ang paghikbi.

She wanted to defend herself. Gusto niyang patunayan sa kanila na hindi siya kahihiyan, na may maipagmamalaki siya. Pero wala namang silbi ‘yon. Their minds are already closed. Sa paningin ng mga ito, kahihiyan siya. Isang malas.

Well, ganyan naman talaga ang tingin sa 'ming mga anak sa labas. Sa isip-isip niya.