the Youngest Princess

I take my seat on the chair opposite Father's, my gaze flickering about the room. It had been some time since he'd last requested my presence in his library, I'd nearly forgotten how vast his book collection was. The high oak shelves were crammed full.

"Irellia," My eyes meet his, the frown he's wearing instantly conjures one of my own. "your sisters tell me that you are still upset about your future." 

I scoff. "Of course I am, how could I not be?"

"The kingdom of Saffron has enjoyed nearly a hundred years of peace, this has been thanks to the pact made between your grandfather and the last great alpha of the wolf-men." My father explains in a grave tone.

I sigh in response, I'm so tired of hearing this old story. But it seemed that, once again, he's intent on telling it.

I decide to do it for him. "The pact states that the youngest daughter of the king from each following generation would become the wife of one of their kind." I can hear every bit of resentment in my voice, every ounce of blame I harbor. He's the king, surely he could save me from this fate. Instead, he pushes me toward it.

The king's lips pulled down into a frown. Whether he is sympathizing with me, or disappointed in my obvious lack of acceptance, is something I can't quite tell. Though my gut tells me it's likely the later.

"Irellia, you may not be pleased with your betrothal, but there is no way around it." He pauses to place a hand on my shoulder, though it gives me no comfort. "You know the goblins would attack our kingdom, as they have many others, and that we do not have enough men to repel them ourselves. Saffron is small and we are not strong, but the wolf-men are. With their protection we remain safe. Alive. We need our pact with them, you must understand that."

That was it, I needed to get away from him! I do not bother with asking for permission to excuse myself, as custom dictates. Instead I rise from the velvet chair and state. "I am leaving."

The King rises, his lips twisting into a scowl. "I am not done talking to you. You will stay until I say otherwise."

"What else is there to talk about?" I ask, feeling exhausted and trapped. I can't help but say my thoughts out loud. "I am a possession, not a princess. I exist solely for the sake of being sold away to the highest bidder. My highest bidder just happens to be some beast of a man- if you could even call him that."

He sighs as he looks at me, I can see a sadness in his eyes as he replies. "I know that you feel suffocated, having your future laid out before you." Father reaches out, gently taking hold of my hand. "I am trying to give you freedom now, I have even limited your guard down to Jaron alone when you are within the castle." He pauses, smiling tenderly for reasons that escape me. "You've complained about feeling 'crowded' since you were a child. Don't ruin this chance by worrying about a future you cannot change."

I nod and make for the door, this time he doesn't stop me.

My thoughts remain on the 'Wolf-Men', how they claim the wolf is not their true form. Based on what my sister Virina told me after father dragged her along to see their 'Alpha-Tournament', I seriously doubted. She'd said they had an odd habit of sniffing people, how they refused to wear shoes, had no respect for one's personal space and that they drank from bowls rather than cups.

How could I be expected to marry such a person? It was unacceptable! Especially considering I-

"Princess, what is wrong?" An all too familiar voice inquired, its owner gently placing a hand on my shoulder in a silent request that I stop.

As I whirl around to face him I can't help what kind of expression I have, one of anger or sadness? The worry on his own failed to provide me an answer. "The same thing that has been wrong all week, Jaron. No, since I was born." I answer, my voice surprisingly even, considering the storm of emotions raging within me.

His expression morphs into one of pity. I hate it when he looks at me in such a manner, it's so far from what I want to see when he gazes at me. 

"Don't look at me like that. I detest your pity." I tell him openly, though my gaze falls heavily to the floor, or rather the soft red rug lining the hallway.

It doesn't stay there long before his hand slips under my chin, raising my head so that I would meet his pale green eyes. My heart skips a beat. "I do not pity you, princess. I pity myself."

"Why?" I ask softly, not daring to move in fear of losing his touch. His hand felt so warm and gentle on my skin, I dreamed of moments like this. I'm surprised by the desire I feel, I know it isn't proper. Disgraceful really. Yet it's there, gnawing at me as I take in his handsome face. His charcoal colored hair licks his face, like waves upon his sandy complexion. He has such a kind, gentle look about him. It matches his personality. I can still remember how shocked I was when Mother introduced him to me, I could not believe that he was a knight.

A sad smile suddenly claims his lips, tearing me from my thoughts, as he answers my question. "I am your royal guard, as well as your friend, yet I'm powerless to save you from this." I nearly pout when he finishes by pulling his hand away, leaving me with a chill where his hand had been. I yearn for its warm return.

"Father is the only one who could save me from this, and he's made it quite clear that he will not." I sigh, then add. "I am just happy to have you on my side, it seems that precious few are."

"Only because it is not them in your shoes." He states, a hint of anger in his tone. It makes me happy, though I feel a bit foolish for it.

"None of my sisters would be happy, yet all but Virina chastise me just as father does. I am tired of hearing how it is for the best, for the sake of Saffron. What of my happiness? Does that truly mean nothing to my own family?" Tears are stinging my eyes by the time I finish.

His arms wind around me, I gasp at the sensation, relaxing into him as he strokes my long hair. "I am so sorry princess." He tells me, I sense there's something else, but he pulls away when someone calls out to him.

"Ah, it would seem that I have found the both of you." Virina says as we turn to face her, casually twirling a strand of her auburn tresses.

"Ah, princess." Jaron looks flustered, as he bows deeply to my sister. "What can I do for you?" The almost shy way he behaves around her always leaves me confused. Is it good or bad that he's grown so comfortable with me?

"Well I was going to have you accompany me to cheer up my little sister, but it appears that you have beaten me to the punch." My sister explains with a melodic laugh, her garnet eyes seem to sparkle with it and I cannot help but feel a bit jealous. Her smile is so light, unrestrained, not heavy like mine has become.

"Irellia?" Virina says my name sweetly, then continues once she's certain my attention has returned to her. "Are you alright? I heard that father asked to speak with you again today."

"Of course I'm not." I say, sounding harsher than intended.

I immediately begin to feel guilty, but Jaron speaks up before I can apologize, his tone heated to the point of scolding me with his words. "You shouldn't speak like that to princess Virina, she’s worried about you."

I was shocked, he had never once spoken to me like that in the three years that he'd served as my royal guard! No response would come to me as I stood there, gaping at him and trying to wrap my head around his change in attitude. He's always been kind to me, no matter what I've done or said.

"It is okay Jaron, I would not be chipper if I were in my sister's shoes." Sister soothes, sympathy written on her face.

"No, he is right." I sigh deeply, brushing back a stray strand of flowing blonde hair, before continuing. "I am sorry Virina."

For a moment, surprise washes over her elegant face, then she replies with a broad smile. "It is quite alright."

"Thank you." I say, with a curtsy.

Jaron clears his throat. "I was actually wondering if I could talk with you in private, princess Virina?" I'm unsure if it's simply my imagination, but I could swear his cheeks grew a bit pink. I don't like that, not one bit!

"Why must I go? Can you not speak with her in front of me?" I ask, hearing the jealousy in my own voice.

Jaron is apparently oblivious to it, if his almost shy smile was any kind of indication. "I would really rather speak to her one on one, if that would be alright?"

My eyes grow wide, flickering back and forth between him and my seemingly intrigued sister. "I would rather you did not!" I state sternly, as everything in me screams not to allow this.

"Irellia, I am very curious as to what it is he has to say. Could you please head to your chambers? I will follow shortly." Virina's soft smile and adult-like tone makes me feel small, though she's only a couple years older than me and not much taller. I find myself nodding despite myself.

My sister offers her arm to the man I so love, I feel a tightness in my chest. I'm left standing there, as they slowly disappear down the long hall. Once they're gone, I bit my lip and try to assure myself that I'm just overreacting. After all Jaron was always by my side, protecting me, comforting me. He wouldn't have had time to fall for anyone else. I'm unsure how long I spend standing there, trying to convince myself, before I finally run after them.

I don't know where they've gone, so I dip in and out of various rooms in my search. Each room is repeating pattern of red and gold, be it carpeting, paint, or even the pictures hanging on the wall. I begin to lose track of the places I've checked because of it, panic grips me until finally I spotted them through an open window. Thank the gods.

They stand in the garden, surrounded by a rainbow of flowers, sunlight glaring off Jaron's shoulder guard. The scene was somehow romantic, though they didn't seem to be talking, they were just staring at one another.  I start to turn away, intent on  making my way out there, when suddenly Virina wraps her arms around his neck. I freeze, my eyes glued to them as Virina slowly leans in to claim his lips.

I fall to my knees, tears slip from my eyes. This can't be happening, I feared that Jaron might have feelings for Virina, but I'd never imagined that she would return those feelings!

My chest feels like someone is squeezing my heart in their hand, my breathing begins to quicken, though it comes out in gasps. I was cursed, first the marriage arrangement and now my sister with the man I truly wished to marry? I would never be able to look at either of them again, such a thing would be far too painful. But how could I ever hope avoid it? Even if I willing give myself over to whatever Wolf-Man would be chosen, there would be no escaping visits to court.

There would be no escaping seeing them… together.

The thought makes my stomach clench, the anxiety leaving me queasy. I feel sick and so very tired of this place, of this life. That's when I have a crazy idea, I can run away to somewhere far from Saffron. Far from its traditions, from the Wolf-Men, and most importantly, I can run away from them. But could I really do it?

I stand up, I can't bring myself to look out that window again. My feet carry me back down the hall, as thought's swirl around in my head. I know that I have enough jewelry in my room to sell and live comfortably, at least for a while. My main concern, if I did leave, would be clothing. All of my dresses were far too fancy to travel in, I don't own anything for travel, except the riding outfits I outgrew over the winter.

There's also the issue of where I'd go, I've never been outside of Saffron before. Father always says that it's far too dangerous. "If I do this, I will need a map as well." 

By the time I finish planning out how I'd do it, I've reached my room. I take a seat on my large bed, sinking into the soft warmth of my furry blanket as I lay back. My gaze flicks across the room, landing on my jewelry stand. The stones sparkle in the light, let in with the wind from my balcony. Each piece was personally chosen, they match my wardrobe and look darn good on me, the thought of selling them pains me.

I raise my gaze to the painting above, the vivid colors in the scene stirring excitement in me. The port city Likuna rose up in yellows and blues before the 'tide road', a stretch of land that connected the city to the shore. When the seas didn't swallow it up. This painting always makes wonder how the city stays above water, it doesn't look that much higher than the road. In any case, I've always wanted to go and see it for myself. I decide that Likuna will be my destination, it surprises me that I seem so set on going.

My gaze falls to my jewelry once again. "Good bye, my lovelies." I sigh and set myself to gathering them up.