Chapter One: Christmas Eve - Six Years Ago

“I reject you as my mate.”

Nick’s voice echoes through Silver Moon pack house, and when his grey eyes find mine, there’s nothing in them. Not anger, not hurt. Just empty, like I never meant anything to him. Like we weren’t planning to run away together just hours ago.

I’m on my knees in the center of the main hall. It’s Christmas morning and sunlight streams through the windows while the whole pack watches me fall apart.

There’s blood on my clothes and bruises I don’t remember getting. My makeup is smeared down my face in black streaks.

The wolf necklace Nick gave me hours ago is missing, nowhere to be found.

“Please,” I manage to say, my voice cracking. “Nick, something happened. I don’t remember—”

“A half-breed could never be my mate.” He says it loud enough for everyone to hear. “Did you really think I’d give up being Alpha for you?”

Behind him, Jessica stands in a white dress with flowers everywhere and red ribbons wound through the decorations. This was supposed to be their bonding ceremony. Nick’s bonding to someone who wasn’t me, when we were supposed to run away together.

“You were nothing,” Nick says. “You were always nothing.”

Blood mixes with my tears as my heart bleeds out.

Ten hours ago, he told me I was everything.

Ten hours ago, I believed him.

Before everything fell apart.

**

Ten hours earlier

**

The cabin smells like pine and wood smoke. Nick built the fire an hour ago, and now we’re wrapped in blankets on the floor in front of it, watching the flames dance. Outside Nick’s late father’s hidden cabin, snow is falling in those fat, unique flakes that stick to the windows and make everything feel like we’re inside a little girl’s Christmas snow globe.

There’s a small tree in the corner that I decorated yesterday with whatever I could find—popcorn strings, paper stars, and a few ornaments from the dollar store. It’s not much, but the lights are twinkling and the whole cabin feels magical on this beautiful Christmas Eve.

It feels like home, really. Anywhere feels like home when I’m with my mate, Nick.

Nick’s fingers thread through my hair while I’m tucked against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. Strong and steady and mine.

“What time is it?” I ask, tracing circles on his chest.

He checks his watch. “Almost nine.”

Three more hours. Three hours until midnight, three hours until we run away from our respective prisons.

My stomach flips with excitement and terror mixed together until I can’t tell which is which anymore.

“Are you scared?” Nick asks, and his voice goes soft the way it always does with me, like I’m something precious he’s afraid of breaking.

“Terrified,” I admit.

His arms tighten around me. “Me too.”

I twist around to look up at him. The firelight catches his grey eyes and turns them almost gold. God, he’s beautiful, all strong jaw and dark hair that’s gotten too long because he’s been too busy with pack business to get it cut. Lips I’ve kissed a thousand times and will never get tired of kissing.

“You’re an Alpha,” I say. “Alphas don’t get scared.”

“This Alpha does.” He touches my face, his thumb brushing across my cheekbone. “I’m giving up everything for you, Emily. My pack, my title, my family. If I’m not scared, then I’m an idiot.”

“We can still change our minds,” I whisper, even though the thought of not going makes me want to cry. “You could stay and be the Alpha you’re supposed to be. Mate with Jessica like your pack wants.”

His jaw tightens at her name. “Jessica doesn’t love me. She loves the title, the power.” His eyes search mine. “You love me. Just me, not Alpha Blackwood. Just Nick.”

“I do love you. So much it scares me.”

“Then stop giving me outs.” His voice is firm now, that Alpha voice that makes other wolves bow their heads. But I’ve never been afraid of it. “I choose you. I’ll always choose you.”

“Even though I’m just a half-breed?”

“You’re not ‘just’ anything.” He shifts so we’re face to face. “You’re everything, Emily. You’re my mate, my future. The only person who’s ever made me feel like I could be something other than what everyone expects.”

My throat gets tight. I want to believe him, I do believe him, but there’s still that voice in the back of my head that sounds like my father. The one that’s been there for eighteen years calling me defective and broken and a mistake.

“What if you regret it?” My voice cracks. “What if you miss being Alpha? What if you wake up in five years and realize you hate me for making you give it all up?”

“Emily.” He cups my face with both hands and forces me to look at him when I try to turn away. “Look at me.”

I do. His eyes are fierce with love and certainty.

“I will never regret choosing you. Never. Do you understand?”

I nod, my eyes burning with tears.

“Say it,” he demands gently. “Say you understand.”

“I understand,” I whisper.

“Good.” He kisses me then, soft at first and then deeper. His hand slides to the back of my neck, holding me close while his mouth does things that make my brain stop working entirely.

When he pulls back, we’re both breathing hard.

“I have something for you,” he says.

“Nick, we agreed no gifts. We need to save money for—”

“I know. But it’s Christmas, your favorite holiday. And this… this I needed to give you.”

He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small box. Black velvet. My heart starts pounding.

“It’s not a ring,” he says quickly. “I mean, not yet. Not until we’re settled somewhere. But I saw this and…”

He opens the box.

Inside is a necklace with a silver chain. The pendant is a small wolf carved mid-run, so beautifully detailed I can see the texture of its fur and the power in its legs.

“Nick.” His name comes out broken.

“It’s you,” he says softly. “Running free. Exactly how you’re supposed to be.”

My hands are shaking as I reach for it. The wolf is warm from being in his pocket, warm from his body heat.

I can’t speak, can’t breathe. Tears blur my vision.

“Hey,” Nick says, and his thumb catches a tear on my cheek. “Why are you crying?”

“Because no one’s ever…” I have to stop and swallow and try again. “No one’s ever given me anything that meant something. That saw me as more than the half-breed mistake.”

“You’re not a mistake.” His voice is fierce now. “You hear me? You’re not a mistake. You’re mine, and tomorrow we’re going somewhere no one will ever make you feel like you’re less than perfect again.”

I’m crying harder now and he pulls me against his chest, one hand in my hair and the other still holding the necklace between us.

“Let me put it on you,” he murmurs.

I nod against his shirt.

He fastens it around my neck with careful fingers. The wolf pendant settles just above my heart, right where it belongs.

“Merry Christmas, Emily,” he whispers against my ear. “Tomorrow we start our forever.”

I turn in his arms and kiss him, pouring everything into it, all my love and all my hope and all my terror and desperate aching need for this to work.

His hands frame my face and his thumbs wipe away my tears. “I love you so much it terrifies me,” he says against my mouth. “I didn’t know I could feel this way about anyone.”

“I love you too.” My voice breaks. “I love you too.”

We sink down onto the blankets and his hands slip under my shirt while mine pull at his. The fire crackles beside us, the Christmas lights blink in the corner, and snow keeps falling outside.

We make love slowly, like we’re trying to memorize each other. His mouth on my neck, my hands in his hair, the weight of him pressing me into the blankets. His breathing goes ragged in my ear and my name falls from his lips like a prayer.

I memorize everything, the way his muscles shift under my palms, the grey of his eyes when he looks down at me, the way he touches me like I’m precious and worth something.

Afterward we lie tangled together with my head on his chest and his fingers tracing patterns on my bare shoulder. The necklace rests between us, still warm.

“Midnight,” he murmurs. “East border. Don’t be late.”

“I won’t be.”

“I’ll have the car ready. We’ll drive until morning, get as far as we can before anyone realizes we’re gone.”

“California?”

“Wherever you want. Somewhere with no packs, somewhere we can be normal.”

Normal. God, what a beautiful word.

His phone buzzes and he groans, checking it.

“Pack business?” I ask.

“Border problem.” His jaw tightens. “I need to handle it. If I don’t show up they’ll suspect something’s wrong.”

Fear spikes through me. “What if they figure it out?”

“They won’t.” He kisses my forehead. “I’ll handle it and come back here, and we’ll leave together at midnight.”

“You promise?”

“I promise.” He sits up and starts pulling on his clothes. “Pack your bag and be ready. This is really happening, Em.”

“I know.” I touch the necklace. “I can’t wait to start forever with you.”

He leans down and kisses me one more time, long and deep and full of promise.

“I love you,” he says.

“I love you too.”

He leaves. The door closes and I hear his truck start and drive away.

I lie there in the flickering firelight, holding the wolf pendant. This is real, this is really happening. In three hours I’ll meet him at the east border and we’ll leave everything behind and start fresh.

Together.

My phone buzzes.

It’s a text from Marcus.

*Hey, you awake? I’m nearby. One last drink before you disappear?*

I stare at the message.

Marcus has been my best friend since childhood, the only person in my father’s pack who ever treated me like I mattered. When I told him about Nick and running away, he’d been quiet for a long time before pulling me into a hug.

“I’m happy for you,” he’d said. “You deserve to be happy.”

I should say no. I should stay here and pack and be ready.

But Marcus is my only friend, really, and after tonight I’ll never see him again.

One drink won’t hurt. I’ll be back in an hour, and I’ll still have two hours before I need to meet Nick.

*One drink. That’s it. Riley’s Bar?*

*Perfect. See you in 20.*

I get dressed, pulling on jeans and Nick’s hoodie that I stole from him weeks ago. It smells like him, like safety.

I touch the necklace one more time.

Merry Christmas, Emily. Tomorrow we start our forever.

I believe it with everything in me.

I grab my keys and head out into the snow.

Three hours until midnight.

Three hours until freedom.

Three hours until everything falls apart.

But I don’t know that yet.

Right now I’m just a girl in love, wearing her mate’s necklace, heading to say goodbye to her best friend.

Right now I still believe in Christmas miracles.

Right now I still believe Nick and I will have our forever.