Her turmoil

ELARA'S POV

I felt a sharp pain that woke me from my sleep.

I had become used to pain at this point, I experienced pain every day from this bond, but this, this pain was different.

It engulfed my whole body, bathing me in aching pain as if hot coal was poured on my body. This pain wasn't focused like the pain from the bond, it was all over my whole body.

I struggled to open my eyes and found darkness staring back at me.

"What... what's going on?" I whispered to myself in the darkness of the prison cell.

Then the realization came.

"I might not make it through this pain".

I had already been sad and mistreated for days now, enduring pain I haven't been able to talk to anyone about, and now...

"Please ....please... help me... anyone" I whispered.

I know the guards couldn't hear me, they couldn't help me.

My head was pounding and everything was just pain, blinking my eyes brought me pain, tears flowed freely down my cheeks.

I was too weak... too weak to even cry for help.

The alpha was right, I am worthless.

And this might just be how I will end.

All these thoughts just kept pouring into my head, I was trying to do anything to stop focusing on the pain, to ignore the pain but I couldn't. 

I slowly felt myself lose control of my body and I fell unconscious.

...

Ice cold water jolted me up from my sleep, but I was too weak to even react. I slowly opened my eyes, but this time, I wasn't met with darkness, there was a light flickering in the corner of my eyes.

I sat up slowly on the straw bed and saw a guard standing in front of me with a lamp and a bucket in his hand.

It clicked, he must have poured water on me to wake me up.

Standing next to him was the beautiful Yvette, the alpha's mistress. Everyone knew her, she was always by his side and in his chambers.

I kept staring between the both of them and Yvette had a cruel smile on her lips.

"Oh, you're finally awake" her words dripping with scorn.

I didn't say anything, I didn't know what to say to her so I just kept staring.

"Stand up," she said.

I reluctantly tried to stand up, my body being very weak from the earlier pain, but I stood up anyway.

She walked to me slowly, and circled around me then scrunched her nose.

"You smell like filth" she sneered

I scoffed, I hadn't had a bath in days and this place reeked, was I expected to smell like roses?

"Well, that's fitting, seeing as you are filth" she continued.

I said nothing and sat back down because my body aches from the pain.

Suddenly she steps in front of me and grabs me by my neck, my hands instinctively reach out to pull her hands back, but her grip is strong, after all, she is a wolf, I could only gasp for air and try to claw at her fingers.

"I am pretty sure you know what happened last night, don't you?" She asked.

I was confused, thinking about what happened, other than the fact that I was in pain for the whole night.

She must have guessed I was clueless from my expression and she continued. 

"Well, the Alpha had me with him all night long and oh, what a night it was, Incase you didn't know, that's part of his plan to punish you, he didn't tell me, but I guessed, when a wolf with a mate is intimate with another, it's torture for his mate, so I'm guessing you were in pain all night, the guards heard you crying"

She said and let out a loud chuckle, my mind started to reel.

This meant the pain I felt last night was from him being intimate with someone else. Tears involuntarily poured from my eyes.

"Oh. Are you sad?" She said, with a fake hint of concern, "you should be, and to be honest, I have no issues in warming the Alpha's bed, but I am deeply unsettled that it was used to punish you, because I am more than that, so I decided it was only right I punish you myself, don't you think so?"

She asked in a soft tone, she sounded crazy.

I was still gasping for air and by now her claws were digging into my throat, I looked into her eyes and saw her eyes glowing, her wolf was at the surface.

Suddenly, she flung me into the wall and my head had the first impact. I fell on the cold ground, my head ringing and pounding.

"That's about right, take it as a gift from me to you, you're worthless and you already know that, I am not even threatened by you, because the Alpha doesn't even want you" she said loudly

I don't know why, but I felt a pang of pain at her words, it must have been the bond reacting to her words. I knew deep down I just wanted to be out of here.

I lay on the floor, my head clutched between my arms because it hurt so badly and I could feel hot liquid seeping through my fingers. I was bleeding.

"I am not sure you will last long here and I will make sure of that, I could easily end you now, but now is not the right time, you should suffer a bit more" she said once more and swiftly turned and walked away.

I heard the gates to my cell close and everywhere was silent once again.

I started crying, was it just a mate bond that made me deserve all this? It was painful, I should have been left without a bond rather than face all this.

"If this is what it means to have a mate, then I wish the moon had never chosen me" I said to myself before my eyes closed on their own.