Chapter 5

Lucian

As the weak Alpha Caleb is taking me to the room, my nose catches a distinctive scent, the most astonishing scent. Lavender and Amber, with a touch of citrus, it's enchanting romantic and also seductive. This scent weakens my knees and all I want to do is just feel it, it makes my wolf growl lowly. It's astounding.

It dawns me that it might be my mate, since weak Caleb doesn't feel it. He looks at me like I am crazy. I walk past him, following the scent.

“Mate!” My wolf Lonan also stirs up impatiently inside me. He pushes me, almost taking over. I have looked for my mate everywhere possible for two years now. I had to become an Alpha without a Luna. I didn't want to just make my girlfriend a Luna.

I wanted a mate, my perfect fit, my better half. Now she is just seconds away from me. A tear of joy escapes my eyes. I am aware of someone following me behind, but I don't care.

All I want is my mate, I have suffered enough. But I am afraid too, my life hasn't been a bed of roses. I have been left by three women I have dated in the past. The last heartbreak is the one that took a toll on me. I had loved Emily with all my heart, I was convinced she was my mate. we complemented each other, she was my female version.

One day we had gone for a picnic since I had been away from her due to pack duties. I wanted to make it up to her, I hated it when she was upset in any way. I was only eighteen by then but we had already dated for a year and a half. suddenly her eyes went blank, she stood up from the mat we had sat on and started walking like a zombie to a certain direction. I was so worried, that I followed her behind calling up her name in confusion. I even mind linked my friend Mason who is now my beta to come with the car since we had walked all the way. But then as I continued to follow her, I noticed a guy coming from the opposite direction towards Emily, he also had the same expression and look on his face.

As if on cue, they ran towards each other and embraced. without a word they locked lips and kissed deeply. My heart was torn to shreds. I didn't expect Emily to do that to me. I was heartbroken. After kissing, she walked away in her mate's arms without throwing a single glance at me. She made it seem that I meant nothing to her, when she meant the world to me. She was my solace, I would go to her whenever my parents abused me verbally or physically. She would calm me down by her beautiful words and smile. I would get lost in her eyes. I always wished that I would just run away with her and abandon the pack.

I haven't been able to perform sexually ever since she abandoned me. I didn't want to stop her, all I wanted was for her to just explain, or maybe sympathise with me, but that didn't happen.

For some reason, my d**k doesn't respond to any other woman anymore. Emily was the very first girl I had s*x with. My d**k only responded to her.

My joy is short-lived when suddenly the scent disappears as I reach a small door leading to the attic, of course, bringing me to my senses. My heart constricts painfully in my chest, I feel as if I wouldn't breathe anymore. Was it just in my mind? But my wolf felt it too. I remember the words of an old elder in the pack who died some months back. " You will never be happy, unless you get rid of the mark." That was all he said.

For sometime I has wondered what mark he was talking about. But I came to realise I had this mark on my back, like a tattoo or some birthmark. I couldn't really tell. It was so weird. It's a small pentagon colored black, and in the middle it has a small zig zag shaped line. I don't really know what it means. But as he said, I have never been truly happy in my life. Whenever I feel happiness, Sadness always follows.

I collapse on the stairs, sitting and burying my head in my hands. How could this be possible, I thought my suffering had ended. Why moon goddess! Why? I can't stop the tears that are forming in my eyes, and the heartache too. My wolf is broken inside of me, I hear his little sobs as he recoils to the darkest part of my mind. He needs space to calm himself, I understand him. I need space too, also I cannot break down before this weak Alpha, no way, I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. I am calling him weak because he looks so weak, he even shivers when I make eye contact with him. It's pathetic, what kind of Alpha will he make?

“Alpha Lucian are you okay, and what were you going to look for in the attic.” His small voice asks, I was aware of his presence all along. I take breathing exercises slowly so as not to alert him under my large palms before raising my head up to face him.

“Nothing, Caleb, I was just mind linking one of my men.” I lie. “He was in so much pain that I felt it through the link.” I add to the lie. Alpha Caleb eyes shoot wide open, poor little thing did he just believe my lie. I smirk inwardly, he is such a naive boy.

“Ooh! Let him know that I am sorry.” For some reason, I find this a lie. I know he doesn't care for anyone apart from himself. “Let me take you to your room then.” He offers. As I am following him, I hear his heart rate escalating, I know it's not because of me. Then what is he afraid of, what is he hiding from me?

He shows me to my room, a large bedroom with everything I might need. I can even cook in here if I want to. But I am not one to be swayed by riches and staff.

The moment he leaves the room, the feeling of despair kicks in. Will I ever find my mate? Where is she. Will she be taken from me?

I decide it's best that I didn't find her, it wouldn't have lasted anyway.

***

I wake up in the middle of the night, my heart thumping so hard. I had the most disturbing dream, a small voice coming from the attic was asking me for help. I could hear noises of wolves attacking the lady behind the voice. I couldn't see her, but knew that I was the only one who could help her.

Suddenly I feel the need to go to the attic. I need to know what's in it. I get off the large bed, scan around for my clothes since I notice that I am in my boxers. I don't even know when I got off my clothes, but it's a habit I have. Clothes seem to prick me when I am in a closed room, they bore me, I like freedom. So, often I sleep without a cloth on my body. My beta knows it well, so he doesn't come to my room without knocking.

I find my clothes under the bed, how they got there I don't even know. I can be so absent-minded when I am sleepy. My beta says that I even speak gibberish at times. I walk carefully out of the room, closing the door behind me. I don't want to alert anyone, there is no sound of any person walking around except for the wolf howls I hear from afar, and it's normal, wolves love howling at night.

I slowly find my way to the attic, taking one step after the other. In a short while I get to the door, I open it since it's locked from the outside. I chuckle, I am so foolish, what do I expect to find from here? It was just a dream. I want to go back, but something in my senses persuades me to go in. I step inside, the space is so small for my large frame, I am forced to bow awkwardly. I scan the room in my wolf eyes, there is nothing here, just a bunch of rubbish and junk. A waste of my sleep, now I can't even go back to sleep, I will just go for a run. I turn 360 degrees so that I can walk out of the attic.

“Help me!” I hear a tiny voice just as a murmur coming from right behind me. I get startled because it's the same voice I heard in my dream. The only difference is that it was audible in my dream. This one seems fainter and weaker.