Chapter 3

The psychiatrist repeated every word I'd said to my parents.

His final diagnosis was simple—there was nothing wrong with me. I was just using an extreme way to protect myself and get back at the world.

My mental state was like a string stretched to its breaking point. Any additional pressure could make it snap completely. For me, dying was the best way to protect myself.

After hearing this, Mom locked herself in her room for the entire day. Dad smoked one cigarette after another.

Only Rebecca still believed that I was putting on an act to gain sympathy. "Carl is faking it! He's fooled you all! He just wants to get rid of Isaac!"

Isaac hid behind Rebecca, looking at me timidly, but I could see a hint of smugness in his eyes.

"Mom, Dad, don't worry. I'll get along with Carl and help him get better," he assured them.

Maybe he thought that as long as Rebecca still believed him, no one could touch him.

The atmosphere at home grew increasingly suffocating.

To ease the tension, my parents decided to enroll me in the elite private school Isaac and Rebecca attended. They naively believed that being around normal kids my age might help me get better.

Isaac was the first to object. He threw a fit, screaming in disbelief, "I don't want to go to school with him! Everyone's going to laugh at me!"

For the first time, Dad spoke to him sternly. "This decision is final."

Isaac angrily ran back to his room, but I knew he wouldn't let it go that easily.

Sure enough, on my first day, I became the center of attention. Word had spread that the Johnsons' long-lost son was a lunatic fresh out of a mental hospital.

Isaac's friends were fussing over him, then whispering and pointing at me.

"Isaac, your brother looks so creepy."

"I heard he tried to blow up your whole family by leaving the gas on! If that isn't crazy, what is?"

"You'd better watch your back around him."

Isaac made a show of looking hurt. "Don't say that. My brother is just sick. We're family. He wouldn't hurt me."

The more he defended me, the more frightening everyone thought I was.

It didn't take long for everyone to start ostracizing me. No one talked to me. Someone drew a line around my desk to keep me separated from everyone else, and ink was splashed all over my textbooks.

I couldn't care less. Compared to what I endured at the orphanage, this was nothing.

During PE, the teacher let us choose which sports we wanted to play. One of the students sent me to get some basketballs from the equipment room.

The moment I stepped inside, the door clicked shut behind me. The room went completely dark.

I heard Isaac and his friends laughing outside.

"Lunatics belong in cages! Who let him out of the hospital anyway?"

"Isaac, do you think he'll go crazy in there and start biting himself?"

Isaac laughed and said, "Maybe! Why don't you crack the door open and check?"

"No way! I'm not looking!"

There were still 40 minutes left until the end of class. All I had to do was sit there and wait.

The darkness and cramped space gave me a sense of comfort I hadn't felt in a long time. I even started to doze off.

I didn't know how much time passed before an impatient voice came from outside.

"Hey! You dead in there, psycho? Make a sound if you're alive!"

I ignored him.