Chapter 4

Jason’s POV

I called Catheryn several times, but she wasn’t answering. I ran my hand through my hair and paced back and forth in front of my car while trying to reach her. Where is she? After several attempts, she finally answered the call.

“Catheryn, where are you?” I asked right away. I heard her sigh.

“I’m home. You seemed busy, so I didn’t want to disturb you,” she said. Only then did I breathe a sigh of relief after hearing that she was safe at home.

I felt guilty. I shouldn't have gone to that place. I made Catheryn wait, and I didn’t even bother to call her. I pressed my fingers to my temple, frustrated with myself.

“Catheryn, I’m sorry. I should’ve called and told you earlier that I’d be late,” I told her as I got inside the car.

“It’s okay, Jason. I know you’re busy. You’re always busier than me,” she replied. But I could sense the sadness in her voice. I knew she was disappointed, but she was still trying to understand me.

“I’m heading home. Wait for me. I’ll pick up some food on the way—if that’s okay with you,” I said as I started the engine.

“Um… actually, I already ate with my colleagues. What about you? Have you eaten?”

Of course. I was two hours late. Maybe her coworkers felt bad for her and decided to eat out with her. I closed my eyes in frustration. Damn you, Jason.

“Jason? Have you eaten? I can cook something for you if you haven’t,” she offered.

I quickly replied, “No, I’ve already eaten.” Even though I really hadn’t. But it was my fault, and I had no one else to blame but myself. “You can rest and relax. I’m really sorry, Catheryn. Let’s go out tomorrow instead.”

“Oh, I can’t. I have an event to attend tomorrow,” she said.

“Is it out of town or just around in the city?” I asked.

“It’s in Luminhaven. It’s an overnight event, so I’ll be back the day after tomorrow.”

I rubbed my face. So she won’t be home tomorrow? “So I’ll be alone in the house?”

“I’m sorry, Jason,” she apologized.

It always hurts to hear that word coming from her—"sorry."

“No. I should be the one saying sorry, Catheryn. Sorry for being late. I’ll make it up to you when you get back from your event. That’s okay, right?”

“Of course. It’s okay,” she replied, but I could tell there was no excitement in her voice just like earlier. “Drive safe. I’ll take a shower before bed.”

“Okay. See you soon.” That ended our call. I let out a deep sigh and leaned back in my seat, staring out the window.

I disappointed her again. I’ve made so many mistakes, and yet I know she’ll still forgive me. She always does even when I hurt her. She still loves me, even after thirty years. But should I get too comfortable with that? Just because I know she loves me and will forgive me, does that mean it’s okay for me to keep hurting her?

“You’re a trash if you do that, Jason,” I said to myself. “Catheryn is only human. She gets tired too. Don’t push her too far, or in the end, you’ll face death all alone.”

Being alone is far scarier than being with someone who’s treating you like a dead person in their head.

I decided to go home. When I arrived, the lights were off. Catheryn must’ve already gone to sleep since she has to wake up early tomorrow. But when I opened the door, I saw the TV still on and a dim light coming from the dining room. I found Catheryn leaning against the couch, already asleep.

“She still tried to wait for me?” I whispered. I looked at the dining table and saw food neatly wrapped in plastic.

Even though she was tired, she still cooked for me. I looked at Catheryn. This woman. I told her I had already eaten, yet she still cooked. Did she know I hadn’t eaten? Or did she just sense that I had lied? I clenched my fist.

‘Do I really deserve her?’ That question kept playing in my head.

But I already knew the answer. ‘No. I don’t deserve her.’

I stood in front of her and knelt down. I gently brushed away the hair covering her face. Catheryn is beautiful. Honestly, she’s even more beautiful than Eunice. I don’t even know what she saw in me or why she loved me so much.

But this time, I want to take care of her the way she took care of me. This isn’t just about gratitude anymore. I’m slowly falling in love with her. I hope this dream continues until I can return all the love she’s given me. Just the two of us, happy and starting a family. That’s all I want.

I kissed her forehead before deciding to carry her to the bedroom. Carefully, I lifted her in my arms. Thankfully, she didn’t wake up. I laid her down gently on the bed, and she instantly looked more comfortable.

I went downstairs to eat the food she cooked for me, and afterward, I cleaned up. I also took a shower to freshen up, even though the cold air from the AC bit through me. I looked at Catheryn sleeping soundly.

What can I do for her?

While getting dressed, I thought about ways to make it up to her tomorrow. Then the idea hit me. Why not cook her breakfast? But the problem is… I don’t know how to cook. Should I ask my parents’ chef to cook for us? No, that would be insincere.

Then should I just learn to cook?

By 4 AM the next day, I looked at the dishes I had prepared on the table. The presentation wasn’t great, but maybe the taste was okay? I hoped so. I didn’t really know what her favorite dishes were, so I cooked a bit of everything—pancakes, bacon, Hungarian sausages, and anything else I could think of for breakfast.

I heard someone coming down the stairs. Catheryn appeared, carrying her travel suitcase. She looked surprised when she saw me.

“Jason?” she called.

I smiled. “Yeah. I made you breakfast, Catheryn. As a peace offering?” I said. She looked at the table, and I saw the surprise in her eyes.

“You cooked all this?” she asked, walking toward the table. I nodded.

“Yeah. I did my best. I know it doesn’t look very appetizing, but… I think the taste is okay?” I wasn’t even sure, but for me, it was good enough.

She stared at the food in disbelief, then looked at me. I didn’t expect what came next—she smiled. There was no sunlight yet, but why did it feel so blinding?

“Thank you, Jason. And… I forgive you,” she said, smiling widely.

All I could say was, “Yes,” before pulling out a chair for her to eat.