I was startled awake, drenched in sweat. Death had been visiting me again. He was stalking through my house, walking from room to room. I didn’t know if it had only been a dream or if it was a sign. I had no inkling that my life would soon change forever.
I sat down at the breakfast table and looked at my mother. Her aura was clear, by that I mean it didn’t have death lurking about. I exhaled not realizing that I had been holding it in.
“How are things at school?” Karani asked. I hadn’t been home all that much, and it wasn’t due to training or Alpha lessons.
“It’s okay, you know, same stuff every day.” I smiled at her.
“I’m sorry you miss Sarah so much.” She had a way of just knowing everything. I nodded my head but said nothing. She knew I wasn’t seeing her anymore; I didn’t have to tell her.
“Where’s Dad?” I asked and looked toward his study.
“He already left for work, but he said he’d see you at the den later.”
The den was where I met my father every afternoon to fight. No gloves and no rules, we fought and trained and by the time we got home the blood had dried and our wounds had healed. Karani regularly expressed her disgust at having to wash the blood from our clothes.
The den was also our meeting place, where the whole pack gathered, and where we made decisions. We made rulings, and all the things that had anything to do with wolf life and wolf business happened at the den. Sometimes it was accepting a new wolf, one that had lost their pack, into our pack. It didn’t happen often that someone didn’t know they were a wolf, but they stood a bigger chance at acceptance than a lone wolf did. We would explore all the reasons and decide. Sometimes it was also the place where a wolf’s life ended.
Our den was situated higher up in the mountains, away from the town and away from our house. We had small gatherings at our house with James and his parents and so on, but pack meetings were always held in the den.
I was too young to be involved in the decision making of the pack but very soon I’d be allowed to sit in and learn how it was done. Only Malachi could decide when that time would be. They say the Alpha just knows instinctively when his time as Alpha would end. Usually an Alpha was replaced because of death, but sometimes the Alpha just got old and wanted to retire.
That night as I went up to my room to shower I planned to catch up on homework before Malachi or Karani got a call from school. I completed everything and I laid down on my bed. I put my earphones in and turned the volume up. Soon I was drifting off to sleep as I listened to Cradle of Filth screaming in my ears.
I woke up in a cold sweat again, shivering. Death walked out of my bedroom door; it was as if he wanted me to follow him. I got up and walked down the hall, Death turned around and laughed at me. Was he taunting me? I didn’t know what to make of it. Why was he here? I looked around, Death had disappeared just as suddenly as he had appeared. I felt confused, I hadn’t seen an aura change with my parents. Has Death come for me?
Malachi had only given me an odd look when Karani mentioned Michelle at breakfast the day before school closed for the year. I had no idea how Karani even knew about that but that was Karani for you. She had her ways.
“She knew it wasn’t real,” I said to Karani.
“Kiran, you pretended to date another girl,” Karani said.
“As long as you don’t pretend to sleep with this one too,” Malachi said while reading his newspaper. A blush had crept over my face at his remark. ‘Fair enough,’ I thought.
“I’m not that stupid. She’s part of the pack. I’d never do that,” I said and he nodded.
“As long as we understand each other,” he said.
“Besides, she already fake broke up with me,” I said and shrugged. I didn’t add that I had already moved on to someone else, a few of them.
James was waiting for me in the parking lot at school since he had spent the night at home. He looked refreshed but also a bit worried. I was very in tune with James’s emotions, he was my confidant, my best friend. Maybe it happens like that for a reason, I’m not sure. We’ve known each other since birth – just two hours apart – and we have been inseparable ever since.
Our friends at school hadn’t stopped talking about my break-up with Sarah. The cheerleaders didn’t sit at our table anymore and our jock friends avoided the subject. At our age it wasn’t uncommon to date a lot and being heartbroken wasn’t something we discussed at school.
I’d see Sarah from afar, fading in front of my eyes and I tried to steer clear of her. Occasionally, I’d see her at the store, the movies or as I jogged through town. Seward was only that big and it was bound to happen. I was also busy with Malachi and it didn’t happen too often, but every time I did see her, it changed something in me. I mean, I couldn’t tell her, ‘I can’t see you anymore because you’re human and I’m not.’
“Sarah says she really needs to talk to you,” James said. He didn’t look too happy about it; he knew the rules as well as my father’s ultimatum to me. He also knew how bad it had been for me emotionally.
“Just keep it quiet,” I said.
After school, Sarah waited for me next to her car. She was looking intently at me as I walked over and I could see something wasn’t right with her aura as it had a second line around her own. Something definitely wasn’t right here. A shiver ran down my spine, she was heartbroken, she felt lost. The human emotions ran through me and I quickly switched them off. It was overwhelming to feel what she felt.
“Hi Sarah,” I said, keeping my expression neutral.
“I’m pregnant, Kiran,” she said softly, dropping the biggest bomb of my life on me.
I stood there with my mouth hanging open, at a complete loss for words. ‘This isn’t happening. This is crazy, I’m so dead,’ I thought to myself. This could destroy my family, my future, my place in the pack. All these thoughts ran through my mind simultaneously and I could see the disappointment in my parents’ eyes.
“Get rid of it!” I said angrily as I turned and walked away from her.
I could hear her crying, and every fiber of my being told me to turn around and make amends but I knew I couldn’t do that. I walked past James and he followed me to the Jeep. I was in deep shit and I knew it would only get worse if it got out.
“What’s up with you?” James asked me. He was connected to me in a way that only wolves could understand. We would probably die together one day, that’s how close we were.“Sarah’s pregnant,” I said flatly, and told him the whole story. He was probably the only person that would understand everything. He nodded at all the right places and eventually agreed with me, getting rid of that baby was the only thing to do. I knew it wasn’t right but nothing about that situation was right.“Come on, I know what’ll take your mind off everything. Sam’s having a party tomorrow night,” he said with that wicked smile of his.Another shiver ran down my spine, ‘I should stay home,’ said that little wolf voice inside my head. On the other hand, getting out and having a drink or two might not be the worst thing. Tomorrow was the last day of school and we had some vacation time to look forward to.I arrived home an hour before the party started and I took a quick shower and dressed. I was picking James
We were all in the living room, standing to one side. Marilyn was in the crowd dancing as she kept looking at me and James had just rolled his eyes. Her moves were suggestive but for some reason I wasn’t keen on hooking up with her again.Jasmine walked towards us and I could see that she had been drinking too much. I didn’t want a confrontation over Sarah but she stumbled into my arms and giggled non-stop as I steadied her. She chose that moment to kiss me in front of everybody, she was also Sarah’s best friend and I pushed her away. I could feel Sarah’s eyes on me and when I looked up at her she had tears in her eyes.Sarah walked up the stairs and I just stood there, watching her go. Her aura slowly turned black, and I froze. Death. Confusion took a hold of me because Sarah had never been to my house, yet Death had been lurking there.I chalked it up to being emotional and angry and I convinced myself that my imagination was playing tricks on me. I walked back to where James and Sa
Malachi tried to keep my routine as normal as he could. That meant, training at the den, every day. I wallowed in self-pity, and the prospect of training didn’t lighten my mood.“You have to focus,” he said as his bare fist landed on my nose, and a trickle of blood appeared.“I’m trying to,” I replied, and brought my hands up to protect my face. His punch caught me in the ribs, and I grunted, and felt it break. Malachi had no mercy on me. Another punch came for me and I managed to block it, but missed the punch that caught me on the side of my head.Malachi stopped and looked at me. “It’s no use trying to train you when you fight like a three-year-old girl.” He grinned at me and I returned his grin. He loved his insults especially if they added to my humiliation.We got into Malachi’s Navigator and drove home to shower. Karani just gave us a look as she saw the blood from my nose and told Malachi to take it easy on me. Tomorrow would be a rough day for me.It was the day of Sarah’s fu
Her name was Adara, and she was broken. That’s the thought she woke up with every morning. She didn’t need to tell herself that, it had been beaten into her ever since she could remember. Her mother, Juniper, was a weak woman. Nobody knew what had happened in her life to make her that way, she didn’t talk about the past at all.The only family Adara had in this cold world was her mother and her stepfather, Ramos. She didn’t remember hugs or kisses or even birthday parties. Soon she would be seventeen, and then it was just one more year until she could leave – if they let her leave.She didn’t have many memories from her childhood, almost like something or someone had made her forget, and sometimes she felt that someone inside her was missing. It was something that always felt just outside her reach and at times she wondered if she was going crazy.At first, it was just Adara and Juniper, alone in a small apartment. If she didn’t do the laundry or clean the apartment, it simply wouldn’
“Adara!” She jerked her head up at the foreign voice calling her name.“Yes, Miss Jackson?” Everyone in class was laughing at her. She had fallen asleep at her desk. Again. The bell rang, and Miss Jackson told her to remain seated as everyone else left the class.“Adara, is something wrong at home?” she asked so gently that Adara burst into tears. She always sat at the back of each class. She never talked to anyone. She did just enough to avoid being noticed. How was it that she noticed her? Where had she gone wrong?“No, Miss Jackson. I just went to bed very late last night.” She tried to give her a convincing smile and shrug of the shoulders like a regular teenager would.“I want you to go see the school counselor. You sleep in class every day. You don’t involve yourself with anything at school, and I can see that you’re losing weight. Your eyes have dark circles under them.” She studied Adara carefully and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Some people could be so compassionat
Juniper came into her room later and sat down next to her. She sighed loudly and looked at Adara. “Oh, Adara. What have you done?”Adara felt tears well up in her eyes. How could she be that way? Didn’t she care about her at all?“Ramos told them that we suspect you’re doing drugs and that you’re constantly in trouble with the police for shoplifting. I think they believed him.” She had said it in such a way that made it sound like a good thing.Tears rolled down Adara’s face, she shouldn’t even care about all that. They always did that. It hurt to know that everything people knew of her was a lie. What possible future did she have in this world? She felt so lost and lonely, wondering if her own mother ever loved her.“Ramos will take care of that nosy teacher tonight,” Juniper said.“What do you mean?” Adara asked but Juniper put a finger to her lips instead.“The school will have more pressing matters to deal with than a teacher worried about a student.” Juniper smiled at her.“Mom,
Malachi sat in his office, staring at the contract on his desk. He closed his eyes and rubbed his fingers against his temples. He felt inadequate and it was a feeling he hated. His son was hurting and there was nothing he could do to help him.He’d warned Karani, told her that it wouldn’t end well, but she’d gone against him like she always did when it concerned Kiran. Malachi sighed as he thought back to the conversation they’d had.“Malachi, he’s only fifteen there’s no harm in him dating her now, give him the freedom of choice you never had,” Karani said one night as they discussed Kiran and Sarah’s relationship.“It’s wrong, it’s unnatural,” he said to her angrily.“He’s in love.” Karani’s voice was unusually quiet and Malachi’s temper was ticking towards dangerous.“I don’t care if he’s in love, when he shifts for the first time in a few months, what do you think will happen?” Malachi had been brooding about this ever since he’d seen them together, walking hand in hand like they
School would start soon, and I wasn’t prepared to face everyone. The rumors had taken on a life of its own. Did Sarah kill herself because I dumped her? Was it because Jasmine had kissed me? Nobody thought of pregnancy. Sarah wasn’t thought of as cheap or easy, and she hadn’t been. Our relationship had been one of mutual love.I hadn’t seen any of my school friends, except for James. I didn’t take their calls and after two weeks they stopped calling. I was in my own emotional hell and I hadn’t switched my emotions on since the funeral. No good would come of that as I soon spiraled out of control.The newspaper published nothing more about Sarah. Just the lonely caption, ‘Local Teen Takes Her Own Life,’ with a picture of Sarah smiling. My name wasn’t mentioned in the article, and I had to wonder if that was because of Malachi or because of her parents.A week into the summer holidays, we traveled to inner Alaska and Canada to visit other packs. Malachi knew a lot of people and he held