Risking It All

"Just one more week, one more week and all my years of sacrifice would all be worth it." I say to myself, as I look at the pile of textbooks on the floor. I've been cramming for my finals for who knows how long, to a point where I cant anymore. So now, I'm lying on the sofa, staring at the ceiling.I am on the verge of completing my degree as an actuarial scientist. I always loved the idea of structure, control and assessing each outcome to make sure it is the most desirable. Making sure that choices were always well assessed. Throughout my schooling career my results were always in the top 3. Not because I was born smart but because I worked so hard to make sure they were what I wanted for myself. I planned every aspect in my life to becoming an actuary. My dad always said dynamite comes in small packages, so I planned on being that dynamite.I hear screaming and laughing coming from outside my on campus apartment block. I get up and peep through the window. It looks like a

Forest:Why the hell am I burning up like this?Is it a heart attack or maybe even a stroke. I've never heard of a twenty year old experiencing a heart attack before but I'm sure it's not impossible.Wait, it doesn't feel like there's any pain but I've never felt this burn sensation before.Like my heart is under attack and it stands no chance.Like I actually enjoy whatever this is.I gaze up and I completely forgot that there's this stranger staring holes into my eyes.Oh crap, there it is again.It's him. I think. He is causing this sensation.I try to look away as fast as I can but his gaze holds mine. I try to look away because I feel like he is busy breaking past the layers I so love to build up around myself, just by a simple gaze.But I can't and the burn stays there.I forgive myself for feeling this way almost instantly because holy crap, this man is dreamy and absolutely smoldering. Completely different in many ways from hi

Forest:When I wake up the next morning, the amount of butterflies I feel in my stomach is enough to make me want to hurl.In fact, after reading that message last night that's when they made their reappearance.So many questions ran through my mind. Did he mistake me for someone else. What does he want from me. Does he not know his out of my league. What about his girlfriend.Then I started questioning myself too.Why am I feeling this way? Why am I being submissive when it's clearly not who I am? Why am I allowing it when I know I'll probably just be used and dumped like yesterday's garbage? Why does he have this effect on me? Why am I treading on dangerous fields?The most important question I kept asking myself was why was I not backing away from this like I should. I couldn't. I felt trapped by my own desire. Desire to the unknown and making it known. Even though my head is telling me to run, it's like my heart is already handed over.The more though

James:After I learnt that Mel and Lara practically dragged Forest out of the club when I left, I felt defeated.I left the club and headed home, seeing that my sole purpose for being there has left. When I got home, I threw my keys on the table in the entrance hall and headed for the bar.I poured myself a shot of whiskey and threw it back, hoping that the whiskey will settle me. I threw my leather jacket on the couch behind me and placed my hand on my forehead, starting to devise a plan.I knew that I needed to start by Jarrod. So I wait for him on the stairs with another shot of whiskey, this time, savoring it.Jarrod only arrives at the estate after 2 hours which is still early for him, and I didn't mind. While I was waiting to figure out plan Forest, I had emails and memos to catch up on.I've emailed the lawyers the minute I found out about Wentworth's plans and I've asked them to keep it between us, and not my father just yet. I've also asked them

Forest:When James leaves, Mel and Lara immediately start confessing about what had just transpired.They said that he came to get their blessing. That he really cares about me and that he quite possibly, is in love with me.They tell me that Ashley is just a business deal that went wrong and will be cleared up in a week. They urge me to give him a fighting chance and even though everything I heard is what I want to hear, I promise myself not to be naïve and fall completely out of control and head over heels.I will make him prove himself to me and not offer myself up to him on shackled by desire.I'm bothered by the fact that instead of confessing everything to me, he bargained with my friends like I'm a piece of land.After devouring the pizza and the bottle of wine, we crawl into bed. Lara is passed out on the couch and Mel crawls in next to me, snoring almost immediately.Normally her snoring keeps me up but after tonight, the treadmill, the pizz