Mag-log inI watched movies, took a very long nap and woke up once again.I couldn't stay in my room. I can't just sit here staring at the clock and spiraling. I needed... something. I need a distraction, and activity, just something, anything.I did my makeup. I kept it simple and natural. I used tinted moisturizer instead of foundation, a little bronzer, mascara, nude lip gloss. My hair was really cooperating with everything I was up to. It fell in loose waves that looked intentionally casual even though I've been sitting with it for over twenty minutes with the curling iron to achieve the effect.By the time I was done, it was only noon. Five fucking hours until Miles picked me up. What the hell was I supposed to do until then?I grabbed my phone and texted my mom: "I'm going out for a bit. I will be back by 4:30 to get ready. I'm gonna be out for a while in the evening too."Her response was immediate: "Okay honey." The reply was surprising, or more like it made it obvious that she's busy bu
The sunlight streaming through my curtains was the first thing that made me realize I'd slept and woken up, then my entire body that's screaming in protest.For a confused, painful moment, I couldn't figure out why every single muscle felt like it had been run over by a truck. Then yesterday's gym session came flooding back, the squats, the deadlifts, the absolutely stupid amount of weight I'd loaded onto every machine in a desperate attempt to burn off my rage at literally everyone, and I groaned into my pillow.Then I remembered my time out with Miles, and to an extent I told myself that it was all worth it, even as my quads seized up when I tried to straighten my legs. It's totally fucking worth it.My phone said the time was 9:47 AM, and if it had lied to me before I wouldn't believe it cause that means I'd slept almost eleven hours.I couldn't remember the last time I'd slept that long. My body had apparently decided that after the physical and emotional punishment of the last fe
"Because I'm into you, Scarlett... Like I really like you. And I want to keep doing this, taking you out, getting to know you better, trying to decide where this goes. But I need to know if what that meant was that I'm with someone else. If your heart's somewhere else while you're sitting here with me. You know... that's just it"The honesty in his voice was devastating. He deserved the truth. Or as much of it as I could give."It's complicated," I said carefully. "There was... someone. Kinda like... like something." I started stuttering, and almost visible." But... but... i'm trying to figure out if it was real or if it was just the situation that made it feel that way.""And that's what this is?" He gestured between us. "Figuring it out?""Partly," I admitted. "But also because I genuinely like spending time with you. That's not a lie or a test. This right now.... it's real."He was quiet for a moment, processing. Then he looked up and
The wine was good, and even though the food was coming soon, I was anticipating some absolutely excellent meals. Miles was being charming and attentive and everything a girl could want on a date.And I was trying. Really fucking trying."So tell me about Chicago," I said, taking another sip of my wine. "How was the business stuff with your dad? You know that's exactly what you said when you were talking on the phone. Business stuff"Miles made a face. "Boring as hell, honestly. A lot of people sitting in conference rooms listening to all of them talk about contracts, liability clauses and all of that. But it was good for him to have me there. He's been trying to get me more involved in how the family business works, and it's really cool I'm not gonna lie.""Is that what you want?" I asked. "The whole corporate lawyer thing?"He considered that, swirling his wine. "I don't know. It's good money, a stable career, makes my old man happy, and probably makes me chill cause of the money and
Jax.He was in the hallway. Of fucking course he was.He looked like he'd just gotten out of the shower himself. His hair was still damp, and he was wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt that clung to his chest in a way that made my mouth go dry despite everything.He stopped dead when he saw me, and his eyes traveled from my face down to my dress and back up again, and something flickered across his expression. It was too fast for me to identify."You look..." He stopped, jaw clenching. "Nice.""Thanks," I said stiffly, moving past him toward the stairs, and keeping my composure while my heart was hammering very hard, and I hated that just seeing him affected me this much. I hated that part of me wanted to turn around and ask him to tell me not to go, even though I knew he wouldn't. He'd made that abundantly clear last night, and even me, I must go to where I'm headed."Scarlett." His voice stopped me halfway to the stairs.
I peeped the time on my phone and it was 5:03 PM, and my legs were screaming.I'd spent most of the afternoon in my room, alternating between working on my laptop and taking breaks to stretch my sore muscles. Every single time I stood up, my quads were not in support of it, and every time I walked, my glutes reminded me that I'd been a fucking idiot at the gym this morning. But the pain was good. It was grounding. It kept me focused on something other than the growing knot of anxiety in my stomach that's all just cause of one thing, tonight.Mom came around earlier, and by earlier, I mean like... that was one, two, wait, that was three hours ago.She came just a few minutes past 2 PM to ask if I wanted lunch, but I told her that I'd grabbed something when I was out in the gym, which was a big fat lie. I only had a protein shake in my car, and I promised I'd eat dinner, which was another lie cause I'm going out to meet Miles at 7, and I didn't tell her because she'd either make funny
His finger was barely inside me. Just the tip, maybe half an inch, enough to make me crazy but nowhere near enough to help.I could feel myself trying to clench around it, trying to pull him deeper, but he held his hand completely still."Ja..ax—" His name came out desperate, in
He had changed into sweatpants with no shirt, looking at me standing there in just my bra and panties, like a predator looking at it's prey.I'd made a terrible mistake coming here.Or maybe a perfect one.The jealousy I'd wanted him to feel all night was about to eat us both alive.He didn't move.
"He's nice," I said, which was true but also obviously not really an answer, but it felt like a good thing to say.Lexi made this frustrated noise and said "Nice? That's what you're going with?" "What do you want me to say?" "I don't know. That you're into him?
Everyone was together now in this loose comfortable circle that felt familiar and easy in a way that made my chest completely loosen.Miles, Alex, Vera, and two others whose names I knew but didn't really use outside of group hangouts—everyone was here with drinks in their hands and exci







