Chapter 4 Calm and Peaceful Voice

Marco’s POV

I woke up and panicked. I clearly told the lady not to bring me to the hospital. But the smell of disinfectant brushed off my nostril. I wanted to jump off the bed and leave the place. But my body won’t move to obey my thoughts. I tried to sit up. But even the tip of my fingers won’t even budge. 

“Are you awake?” I heard a man’s voice approaching my direction. “That’s quite odd. I gave you a good dose of painkillers so your body could heal and recuperate,” the manly voice continued. 

I wanted to answer and tell him that I am awake. But my eyes won’t open despite my eagerness to find out where I was. And even my voice seemed to have abandoned me. Nothing of my words came out audibly aside from grunts and groans. 

“Marco, right?” the man asked again. I could feel he was standing right next to the bed I was helplessly lying on. “Don’t be hard on yourself. This is not a hospital if that is what you are worried about. If you want to leave this place, sooner, I strongly suggest you get all the rest your body needs. The bullet that hit you was through-in-through. You are out of danger but your body will need to recover.” 

I could hear every word he was saying but they did not seem to register in my anxious brain. I was struggling to open my eyes and move my body. I was feeling desperate to get up on my feet. I was not sure if I would not cause harm to these kind people. So, I wanted to leave as soon as I could.

“Your will is too strong for your body to bear with. I am giving you a safe amount of sedative to calm your nerves and help your body do its part for your recovery,” the man said. 

I was still subconsciously resisting and unwilling to comply with whatever the man was talking about, but I felt my body losing its strength and as if a peaceful sensation was winning over my mental resistance to surrender to a comfortable slumber. 

I didn’t know how long I have slept, but in between times, I would hear people around me talking in low voices as if they were wary their exchange of conversations would wake me up. But just like earlier, it would only be momentary before I drift off to the abyss of the unknown. 

“Water…” I murmured when woke up feeling my throat so dry and scorched. Soon I felt a drop of liquid moistening my lips. I asked for more. I wished someone would feel annoyed at me begging for a drink and that they would splash a bucket of iced water on my face. I will never be mad because I will be very grateful. But the same amount of liquid; just a drop, moistened my mouth for about three more times. Then no more!

“You can’t have a lot for now. My dad, and I mean to say your physician said that unless you are fully awake, it is dangerous to give you more than a drop or moisten your mouth with a drop of water since you are still not fully conscious.”

I froze. It was a woman’s voice this time. And this voice sounded very familiar. It sounded like I have heard that delicate voice for a long time already. 

“My dad says talking to you might also help since you have been sleeping for a good three days now, and letting you sleep might not mean anything simple anymore.”

“I have been sleeping for three days? That must have been a joke. She must just be fooling around with me.”

“Marco, I agree with my dad when he said that you are one lucky man to have bumped with me that day. Well, considering that you are still alive, although unconscious. Because I actually have severe hemophobia, it is the fear of blood, but I was able to help you. Among the other things that I have successfully accomplished in my entire life, overcoming my fear felt incomparable. Now, as silly as it may sound, I am thankful I found you. So, I feel responsible for taking care of you. But I am afraid you might misunderstand me and my behavior. I can see my dad is assuming I am physically attracted to you as a woman to a man would do, but to be honest, it’s not that way. Judging by the looks of you, it would be stupid to think you aren’t taken or owned by any woman yet.”

I pretended to be asleep as the woman blabbered in a soft voice next to me. I could tell her elbows were leaning on the bed and lightly brushing with my right arm at her every move to moisten my lips with the cloth. I could feel the sincerity in her tone and felt ashamed that she thought I was no longer available. Well, to be precise, her words were half true and half accurate. I am not the kind of man who spends cold nights whenever I want to get warmed in bed. 

But I am never committed to anyone. Not married. Not engaged. Not tied to any romantic relationships. I don’t have time for those. Or maybe the right person to claim my icy-cold heart hasn’t appeared yet. Or maybe I don’t deserve such luxury in life. 

I am not proud of my lifestyle. But I was born with it. And for so many personal reasons, I have to stay this way for the time being. At least, until I achieve my life goals. Before then, I have shut my heart and only let my mind rule over my life. 

“Did you know, on my way home from the rest of my interview that day I found you, I dropped by the public hospital to check if I was right to think I have fully recovered from my phobia of blood, but I came to realize I was wrong,” I heard the lady continued talking. 

Her voice was so calm and peaceful. But what she said just now made me feel a hint of indescribable sadness. I wanted to ask what made her sad, but I was also worried she would stop talking once she finds out I was awake. So, I clenched my jaw. 

Something within me was telling me to let her speak her heart out. It was like, someone was telling me to give her open ears. Besides, I still have to familiarize myself with my surroundings. Above all, I need to check how my body was responding. I patiently waited for the lady to leave my side so I could give my legs a try standing from the bed. But she seemed to have so many words left unsaid. 

“I was scared to see you again after taking a peek at the hospital. I was frustrated and disappointed because I did not know how to tell my dad that we were both wrong to think I have overcome my fear of seeing people injured and bleeding. But when he asked me to hand him something while he was pressing on your wound. For your information, even in your unconscious state, you have tried to get up and as you kept moving around despite my dad holding you down, your wound bled severely again. At that time, I felt the same panic I had when I first saw you and helped my dad like a real assisting nurse right next to the doctor as he restitched your wound. I felt weak after, but the fact that I was able to assist him while staring at your bleeding wound made me feel prouder. Isn’t that funny?” 

The more I listened to her stories, the deeper I feel grateful to her and her dad. Among all people, why would I land to meet such kindhearted humans? Why don’t they feel annoyed that I was making things difficult for them by helping me without even knowing what results might I bring to their home? Now, guilt was somehow building within me. 

Silence filled the room. No movements could be heard. I could only tell the lady’s presence was still next to me through the soft blow of her breath on my arm’s skin. She must have fallen asleep. I slowly; ever so slowly opened my eyes. 

She was asleep just as I have assumed. I noticed the surrounding was dimly lit. I looked around to check the time. It was ten past eleven. I closed my eyes again. I tried to listen beyond the sound in the room to tell if it was morning or night. No matter if the room is bright or dark, the sound of the surrounding will also help a person identify the difference between day from the night time. 

“It’s nighttime. No wonder she fell asleep after all that chat,” I murmured. I couldn’t help a faint smile escape my face.