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CHAPTER FORTY-TWO

Author: Cherish
last update Last Updated: 2025-07-03 00:24:05

Ivy’s POV

It was the weekend, thank God.

No school today, which meant no weird hallway stares or drama or any of that stuff. The morning was quiet.

Weirdly, I didn’t totally hate the idea of going to therapy today. Not exactly fun, but not scary either.

The chairs didn’t feel so stiff anymore. Ms. Kay’s voice didn’t annoy me like it used to. I still got nervous, yeah. Just not the kind that made me feel like I was gonna throw up or pass out.

I got there early. The windows were all open, which was weird. Maybe someone finally complained. My arms were cold, but whatever. Better than sweating through another group.

A few were already in the circle, chatting like it wasn’t weird being here. It always felt weird to me.

That’s when I saw Derek.

Back row. Hoodie up. Legs stretched like he owned the place. Head down like he couldn’t care less. He looked half asleep. Or like he wanted to disappear.

I sat a few chairs away from him. Tried not to stare, which obviously meant I stared. I
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    DEREK’S POV I shouldn’t have picked up that FaceTime call. She looked happy. Light. Like her day had been good. I watched her smile as she talked. She told me about her little date with Zane, called it “just fun,” said she rejected him nicely and that they’re still friends. Then she said something else. Liam. That he liked her too. Has confessed to her not long ago.I don’t even know why I acted like that. I just nodded. Said dumb stuff like “cool” and “alright,” pretending I was fine. I wasn’t fine. The whole time, I just kept thinking. It should’ve been me. Not those guys. Me. She said she likes them “as friends.” Same thing she’s said about me a hundred times. But it felt different now. She talked about them like they meant something. Like they were part of her life. And I wasn’t. I felt it in my chest. It just kept getting worse. I stopped listening after that. Told her goodnight and hung up. Then I sat there staring at the screen. Her name still there. I didn’

  • SECRETS & SCANDALS   CHAPTER FORTY - NINE

    IVY’S POV I opened the message from Liam. “Hey. You good?” Just two words, but I couldn’t stop staring—like they were saying a lot more. Like if I looked long enough, I'd know exactly what to say. My fingers hovered over the screen, then... Another buzz. He was calling. I picked up. “Hey,” I said, really quiet. “You home now?” His voice was soft. “Yeah.” “How was your day?” I shrugged without thinking, forgetting he couldn’t see me. “It was okay. Just long. Tiring.” He paused for a second. “So… did you and Zane talk?” I swallowed. “Yeah. I told him no. I said we’re better as friends.” There was silence for a bit. “I kinda figured,” he said eventually. “You okay?” “I think so.” Another pause. “So… just friends?” I smiled a little. “Yeah. We’re good.” His tone shifted. He sounded a little lighter. “Okay. Good. I mean—not good for Zane, but, yeah… I get it.” After that, the conversation felt easier. He started asking random stuff. Like

  • SECRETS & SCANDALS   CHAPTER FORTY - EIGHT

    Ivy’s POV The weekend came way too fast. Saturday. The date with Zane. I didn’t sleep much the night before. I just kept thinking—should I even be going? Zane was nice. Really nice. He didn’t deserve to be led on, not even a little. And I knew I didn’t like him that way. Like… like like him. And I hated that I was still going. But I also felt bad for dodging him so many times. And for spending way too much time with Liam lately. I mean… Zane asked me first. And I kept putting him off. I thought maybe I’d tell him today. Just be honest. But the idea made my chest tighten. Like, would it ruin the whole thing? Would it make it awkward? I didn’t know if I should tell him before the date, so he doesn’t waste his time and money… or after, so I don’t kill the mood right away. I didn’t know what was worse. Anyway, morning came. I hadn’t really decided anything yet. But I still got out of bed and tried to look decent. Not too much, but not like I didn’t care either.

  • SECRETS & SCANDALS   CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN

    IVY’S POV I didn’t want to go to school. But I had to. I couldn't exactly stay at home forever. Everything felt off. I didn’t even know how I was supposed to act around Liam. Or Zane. Both of them. The two of them were always in my head. I just wanted things to calm down again. But no, that was gone. Zane kept showing up—during break, after class, walking me down the hall like it was no big deal. And Liam... I don’t even know. He was just there. Everywhere. I’d turn around and there he was. He acted like nothing happened. Like we hadn’t gone through anything weird. We were talking again. Like usual. But it didn’t feel usual. It felt different. I didn’t even know what we were doing anymore. Liam was acting like someone else now. And it was all the little things. If I tripped, even slightly, he’d catch me. I coughed—he handed me water. Dropped my pen—he already had another. It was weird. Not bad. Just weird. Because this wasn’t how Liam acted. Not with anyone. A

  • SECRETS & SCANDALS   CHAPTER FORTY-SIX

    Ivy’s POV I didn’t want to see either of them. Not Zane. Not Liam. I didn’t even want to be in school. I was nervous from the second I woke up. I got ready slower than usual. Tried changing up my route to class. Walked through school like I was trying to disappear. I kept my head down, took different hallways, skipped my locker. Just wanted space. Quiet. Time to think. My brain wouldn’t stop. Zane liked me. Liam liked me. What the hell was I supposed to do with that? Why now? Why this? My brain was still fried from the cafeteria mess. Or the stares. Or everything else. And of course, avoiding people at school? That’s a joke. Zane kept showing up. Like literally just... appearing. I’d turn a corner—there. Walk out of class—he’d be leaning against the wall like he just happened to be there. Hands in his pockets. Smiling like it was normal. He asked how I was. Walked me to class. Twice. Even when I said I was okay. I appreciated it. I really did. But I didn’t know

  • SECRETS & SCANDALS   CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE

    Ivy’s POV I shut the door and leaned on it. My hands wouldn’t stop shaking. My chest felt tight. I couldn’t think straight. I’d take two steps, stop, then start pacing again. Over and over. Zane. Now Liam. What the hell. I dropped to the floor, still pressed against the door. Wait—what? I didn’t get it. At all. Why me? What was I doing wrong? What was I doing at all? I don’t even know how to look them in the eye now. Or talk. Or exist, honestly. And if anyone at school finds out... No. No way. They’d eat me alive. I can already hear the crap they’d say. The looks. The whispers. Like it isn’t bad enough already. I thought about texting Diane. Or Nola. Just to talk. But what if they told someone by accident? Just in passing. And then it’s out. Everyone knows. I sat there for a while. No idea how long. Then I stood up and went to my room.My sketchbook was on the floor. Weird. I didn't even remember dropping it. I sat on the bed and tried drawing something. A window. A t

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