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2023-08-01 20:45:35Walking upstairs to the office, I sit down. Going through paperwork, I try to concentrate but I just canโt, my mind constantly asking me why I am delaying finding out.
Why am I delaying it? I could find out now and just not say anything until the girls are in bed, but then that would be wrong. I canโt hide the truth from Jackson.
I know I wouldnโt be able to look him in the eyes knowing heโs the dad and not tell him, and it would break my heart seeing him if I knew he wasnโt. So, it waits until tonight.
Sitting, I get into the paperwork, trying to forget everything. Right now would be a good time for Jackson to help me into my subspace. That is one good thing that came from today for sure - the baby is fine so we can use the playroom again.
Nothing considered edge play, or too rough, but still, I can have some things in there. I feel tired. Leaning my head against my arm, I close my eyes, the thought of today just making me exhausted
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Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Limited Options
His hands guide me across the room. I am excited yet at the same time, I know it wonโt be the same. He wonโt use the paddle as hard and he wonโt whip me with the whip. He will use the pinwheel at least, but there is a long list of noโs he has in his mind. His hands pull mine above my head, tying the rope around my wrists. I can move whereas usually my arms are stretched straight up with no freedom to move them at all. โRemember, you get tired or your body gets tired, you tell me, no matter what, Alena.โ Nodding, I agree, but I know how hard it will be for me to tell him to stop when I become tired. His mouth gently caresses mine, slowly kissing down my neck. His hand grasps my breast as he keeps moving down, his fingers running down my skin. Everything is heightened with every little touch. I can feel so much more. His hand stops just at the bottom of my back, his mouth kissing against my pubic bone. His hand slaps down on my ass, making m
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๋ฐ์ดํธ : 2023-08-01Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Future Plans
He smiles at me, his finger stroking along my cheek. โJust because youโre pregnant, doesnโt mean you canโt enjoy sex. You can. I just need to tease you a lot with words and thoughts of what we have done before.โ Looking up at him, I smile. โOh, you did that already. Just teasing me with your words made me wet.โ His slight chuckle is full of humour. โI did. Maybe tomorrow I will play one of the videos for you. Mmm, which one shall I put on?โ Oh, now that would be amazing! โWhat do you mean which one?โ Looking at him, I sense there are more than just two. โWell, every time we have been in here since you agreed to live stream is recorded and that time at work is also recorded, all for you. Beforehand at least one camera was always on recording, that was for safety though, not pleasure hence only one camera before.โ Oh, now that sounds good. โThe time at work, as in the Christmas party? If so, it has to be that one.โ I donโ
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๋ฐ์ดํธ : 2023-08-01Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Carolines Request
While I am cooking, I hear him walking down the stairs. Trying to concentrate on cooking, I pretend I didnโt hear him. Then again, maybe I shouldnโt? โWhat is going on?โ Turning, I look at him. He looks at me, confused. โI am not stupid, Marcus. I saw his face. Something has happened and he spoke to you about it.โ Standing my ground, I put my hands on my hips. Marcusโs laugh is loud. I swear Jackson could probably hear it outside. โYou think stamping your foot and putting your hands on your hips will work with me, missy?โ Looking at him, it clearly isnโt. โWorth a try, isnโt it? It might have worked.โ It really was all I had. I canโt do anything else that might make him tell me. โWell, no, it doesnโt and it isnโt my place to say. You need Jackson to tell you, not me.โ He walks out the front door. So it is something about Jackson? Had it been the team, Marcus would just have said that it is a team matter. Standing, I finish cook
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๋ฐ์ดํธ : 2023-08-01Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Locked Down
Lying in bed, we stay quiet, Jackson not speaking either. Tomorrow is our day together. Marcus leaves the day after for the mission and everything will change while he is away. โAre you okay?โ Turning, I face him. Jackson and Marcus normally always do the missions together. โCourse I am, Kitten. Things are changing, that is all. It will be strange saying goodbye to Marcus when he leaves as I normally go, but I donโt want to risk losing you.โ I feel awful. It would have been him going if I had not stopped him. โHe will be fine, just like you said. You always say the team looks out for each other.โ He nods. โI know, but Marcus is more like a brother than Liam. I have known him since I was about thirteen. He has been there with me through everything.โ I wish I could make him feel better but how can I? โWhy donโt you and Marcus spend tomorrow together? I will spend it with the girls, but the day you spend with Marcus, then the night you sp
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๋ฐ์ดํธ : 2023-08-01Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Man Down
I jump up in bed after the scream woke me. Looking around, Jackson isnโt here. This is the dream. Forcing myself to stay still, I donโt move. What if it isnโt a dream? If it was I would already be checking on the girls. Getting out of bed slowly, I walk to their room. Sure enough, their cribs are empty - the dream is happening. I was wrong to think the issue had left us. Stood outside the girlsโ room, I have two options: safe room or go confront her. I canโt go into the safe room as I donโt have my phone. I left it in the kitchen. That explains why I am downstairs in the dream. Slowly walking downstairs, I stay quiet. Everything is still shut and locked. Grabbing the phone, I dial Jacksonโs number. Do I want to hit the call button? Looking around, I donโt have a choice, or do I? Pressing messages, I quickly type, โHelp!โ Selecting Georgina, Liam and Marcus, I hit send. Pressing the call button, I ring Jackson, tears filling my eyes knowing what is to come
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๋ฐ์ดํธ : 2023-08-01Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Reliving The Moment
Everyone walks in. The police come, asking me questions. I can see their lips moving but there is no sound, no sound just silence and Marcusโs last words on replay. I watch as Troy, Alexander and the other lads come in, all staring at me, unsure what to say. Jackson gives me space. My heart breaks seeing every one of their faces, the pain of the loss. Hours pass by, everyone walking around and talking but I take none of it in. โAlena, go get a shower. Please, do something.โ Jackson kneels in front of me, but I canโt move. I canโt go away. I canโt do it. โI donโt know how to help her.โ Jacksonโs words are quiet. No one can help. Marcus has gone. I watched it myself. He isnโt coming back. This isnโt like Jackson, where there is nobody, no proof. I saw the body, felt it drain of blood and turn cold in my hands. โMarcus would be the one to tell me what to do.โ Jacksonโs head lowers. Marcus was more than his friend, and his brot
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๋ฐ์ดํธ : 2023-08-01Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Running Nowhere
He walks back in. Sitting next to me, his hand grips mine. โAlena, you didnโt let him down and you certainly did not kill him. Remember his last words: that he was happy because of you and no one else. You made him happy. That should be enough for you to realise.โ Nodding, I agree. He did say that. โIt wonโt help bring him back, though, and he still died because of me. Everyone will hate me. I saw the way Troy looked at me. He tried smiling and couldnโt. Even he blames me.โ What a year this has started out to be: New Yearโs Day and we already have a death. โStay here.โ Jackson walks out. I see him talking to the team. They all look towards me and then back to Jackson. Walking back to me, Jackson is followed by them all. Walking into the room, I prepare myself for their abuse and the blame. โAlena, we donโt blame you at all. I tried smiling. The only reason I couldnโt is because you look more hurt and broken by this than any of
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๋ฐ์ดํธ : 2023-08-01Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย The Table
Jackson walks back through towards me. Turning on the kettle, he grabs two cups. โShe doesnโt want to do anything. She said it is up to the team to plan his funeral.โ As I thought, she does not care about him at all, not even now in his death. โI want to help with the funeral.โ Maybe helping will help me. I donโt even know if it will but surely it is worth a try? Jackson hands me the cup of tea. Walking to the sofa, we sit, his arm around me. โI donโt want you to be strong for me, Alena. Yes, I am hurting, a lot, but seeing you broken is what is keeping me going. I canโt be weak when you need me.โ I donโt even know what to say anymore. I just want to hide away. โWhatever you want, Alena. Whatever you need to get you through this, I will do.โ I donโt even know what I want or need right now. โMarcus mentioned a plan for that night, something for me. What exactly was it?โ Maybe knowing this will help. Maybe it wonโt but I wonโt know until I ask. โWell, I heard you talking to hi
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๋ฐ์ดํธ : 2023-08-01
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Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย His Collar
Sitting, we talk about the wedding and her plans, ideas and what she wants. โSo, I have kept quiet for an hour, talk.โ Looking at her, I know what she means but I am not sure I want to talk about it, yet I havenโt really spoken about it. โI donโt know what to say. It has happened and now I am trying my best to move forward.โ I am. It is hard but I am slowly getting there. โWell, talk to me about the last few minutes with him, because the first I heard of what was said was in the church.โ Sitting, I talk about those last moments, explaining how it was then that I realised just how much I loved him. It was still nothing compared to how much I love Jackson, but it is still a lot more than I admitted to before. Sitting, it actually feels nice talking to Georgina. When I am trying to talk to Jackson, I am scared my feelings for Marcus might hurt him. โAnyway, Liam mentioned the will. I am guessing that was a shock.โ Nodding, it was, and no amount of time will make it feel alright
Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Final Goodbye
Sitting, we wait for the solicitor. When he arrives, we sit down to discuss everything. Everyone is happy with the will and we each sign. It feels weird. My signature just made me have 1.8 million pounds for the business, but if it helps women and men who suffer domestic abuse, why not? Everyone leaves and we sit down to eat tea. Our bags are packed ready to leave. โI was thinking, I know the will stated for the business, but could it be used to support other people, not just those who suffered domestic abuse?โ Looking at him, he shrugs his shoulders. โI am not sure. The money will be paid into the business account, but I guess it depends on what you were thinking about?โ How do I explain this? My mind finds the words and tries to get them in the right order so that it makes sense. โI want to do something similar but for those who have lost someone in the army, navy or similar, or through cases like Marcusโs.โ I want something there to support these people, the ones like me who d
Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Nails
The day has been tiring. Getting home with the bags, I am ready for bed. We spent hours walking around shops getting the things we needed. The girls practically have a full wardrobe of holiday clothes thanks to Jackson. Getting in, we get the girls ready for bed. Sitting together, I read them a story each, the ones Marcus bought them with their own names in. Finishing, we put them in their cots. Walking out, we close the door quietly as they fall asleep. โI was thinking, Liam and Georgina were asking about the holiday and coming along. I understand if you say no. They will be in a hut away from us, but Georgina suggested they come for one or two nights there. They would have the girls for us.โ It sounds like a good idea, us all together but separate. We could maybe even get a girlsโ night in with me and Georgina, and Jackson and Liam can go out. โWhat about Helen? Sorry, your mum.โ She isnโt well, and I donโt like the idea of her flying or being left alone. โI am going to pay f
Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Last Will
Opening the drawers, I pull out his clothes. Folding them, I put them in a suitcase. With all his clothes away, I move onto one of the trunks. Opening it, I am shocked. It is a range of toys, all different. I had no idea he had brought it all here, but it has me wondering, would he have been sitting looking at these wishing he could use them with me? Does he have a favourite like Jackson? Getting to the bottom, there is not much in here, just his own toys, whips and things. Putting it back, I donโt even know what we would do with these. Opening another trunk, there is an envelope on top. Opening it, I start to read it. Marcus is divorced. He told us they were going through it but never mentioned it being made official. Putting it to the side, I find more letters, nothing important. Then I see a solicitor one, with the word โWillโ on it. I wonโt open this. I canโt. Placing it to the side, I leave it for Jackson. Another envelope, this one with my name on. It isnโt small; it is b
Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Time passing
Jackson is standing with a woman, one of Marcusโs submissives. She looks upset and hurt, not like Maria. Standing, I watch. They stand talking, her eyes filled with tears. It just shows how amazing Marcus was and how loveable. The rest of the day goes ahead slowly. Sure enough, Maria left after Troy told her she had no right to be there. Jackson spent most of his time by my side. The team were amazing and constantly checking on me. Getting home, the girls are already in bed. Helen hugs us before saying bye and leaving with Liam and Georgina. I donโt feel like I have said goodbye. With everyone there, I couldnโt say what I wanted without some asking questions. It still feels weird here without Marcus around us. Sitting at the table, I now understand what he meant. I did the same thing the past week: me pretending my life didnโt exist. Jackson sits opposite me and his hands grasp mine. โYou are the only person he told that to, you know? I checked. None of us knew why he stared i
Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Maria's Happiness
Walking downstairs, everyone is here: the whole team, Marcusโs other friends, and a few women. I donโt know who they are yet I feel I want to know. Walking to Jacksonโs side, he wraps his arm around me. โWe should walk around and say hi. I will introduce you to people he knew that you have not met.โ Nodding, I agree. I should know who these people are. โHow will you introduce me? What will you introduce me as in regard to Marcus and exactly how much do the team know?โ Jackson turns, looking at me in surprise. Whether that is at my questions or the fact that is the most I have spoken in days, I donโt even know. โWell, I will introduce you as my wife and the closest person to Marcus before he passed. The team know everything. I had to tell them about it all. Explaining why you are this broken by him dying would not work by lying, Alena.โ The closet person to Marcusโฆhe used to be the closet person to Marcus. Had that changed? We start walking around the room, Jackson introducing
Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย The Table
Jackson walks back through towards me. Turning on the kettle, he grabs two cups. โShe doesnโt want to do anything. She said it is up to the team to plan his funeral.โ As I thought, she does not care about him at all, not even now in his death. โI want to help with the funeral.โ Maybe helping will help me. I donโt even know if it will but surely it is worth a try? Jackson hands me the cup of tea. Walking to the sofa, we sit, his arm around me. โI donโt want you to be strong for me, Alena. Yes, I am hurting, a lot, but seeing you broken is what is keeping me going. I canโt be weak when you need me.โ I donโt even know what to say anymore. I just want to hide away. โWhatever you want, Alena. Whatever you need to get you through this, I will do.โ I donโt even know what I want or need right now. โMarcus mentioned a plan for that night, something for me. What exactly was it?โ Maybe knowing this will help. Maybe it wonโt but I wonโt know until I ask. โWell, I heard you talking to hi
Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Running Nowhere
He walks back in. Sitting next to me, his hand grips mine. โAlena, you didnโt let him down and you certainly did not kill him. Remember his last words: that he was happy because of you and no one else. You made him happy. That should be enough for you to realise.โ Nodding, I agree. He did say that. โIt wonโt help bring him back, though, and he still died because of me. Everyone will hate me. I saw the way Troy looked at me. He tried smiling and couldnโt. Even he blames me.โ What a year this has started out to be: New Yearโs Day and we already have a death. โStay here.โ Jackson walks out. I see him talking to the team. They all look towards me and then back to Jackson. Walking back to me, Jackson is followed by them all. Walking into the room, I prepare myself for their abuse and the blame. โAlena, we donโt blame you at all. I tried smiling. The only reason I couldnโt is because you look more hurt and broken by this than any of
Seductive Vibrations Book 2 Enticing Touchย ย ย Reliving The Moment
Everyone walks in. The police come, asking me questions. I can see their lips moving but there is no sound, no sound just silence and Marcusโs last words on replay. I watch as Troy, Alexander and the other lads come in, all staring at me, unsure what to say. Jackson gives me space. My heart breaks seeing every one of their faces, the pain of the loss. Hours pass by, everyone walking around and talking but I take none of it in. โAlena, go get a shower. Please, do something.โ Jackson kneels in front of me, but I canโt move. I canโt go away. I canโt do it. โI donโt know how to help her.โ Jacksonโs words are quiet. No one can help. Marcus has gone. I watched it myself. He isnโt coming back. This isnโt like Jackson, where there is nobody, no proof. I saw the body, felt it drain of blood and turn cold in my hands. โMarcus would be the one to tell me what to do.โ Jacksonโs head lowers. Marcus was more than his friend, and his brot
