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The feel of lips pressing against mine wakens me, my eyes opening and Jackson’s right there, looking down at me, full of sympathy and apology, but it is too late. How could he not even reply to the text?
“Sorry. Before you shout, just hear me out, please.”
I stay quiet, waiting for him to continue.
“I had planned something or rather, booked something today. It was not meant to take long, a couple of hours. I left my phone in the car. I am a jerk. I know I am.” He looks at me. “All I can do is apologise. The whole point was I would go there, find out other options for my Mum and come back. I was meant to be back within a couple of hours. As I got in the car and saw that picture, I realised I fucked up, totally fucked up Alena, and I am sorry.”
I want to say I hate him, that his apology means nothing, that he hurt me, scream at him and hit him for making me feel like he doesn’t love me. I just don’t get how it could take all day.
“I remember the
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His hand pulls the lead, dragging me down to my knees. I watch as he slides his hips forward. His cock comes towards my face, as I stare into his eyes. Slowly I lower my mouth around him, sucking him in gently and teasingly. My mouth is sinful and corrupt as it teases him perfectly, my eyes watching his face as his cock begins to throb harder and faster. Moaning against his cock, watching as desire flashes across his face, his hand pulls the lead, forcing my head to go further down, taking his cock deeper into my mouth. His moans get louder, the grip on the lead pulling tighter, so, with each suck, his cock goes further into my mouth, gagging me. My moans against his cock vibrating as I feel the wetness between my legs grow. His eyes are on mine. Moving my hand between my legs, I rub, feeling the juices drip over my fingers, lifting my hand up to my mouth. Pulling away from his cock as I suck my fingers into my mouth, moaning at the unique taste
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Lying next to me, his fingers trail around my body. “I have to admit, I fucking love looking at the marks on your body.” For the first time, I look down, my eyes going wide. There are bite marks all over my skin, red marks from where the whip had hit me, and cuts from the rope. While I should be disgusted, I smile. It will be a reminder of tonight, a reminder of us being totally free to explore but, mostly, it shows that I am not free for anyone else to have. His hands begin rubbing the cream on my body like he always does, quietly just watching me as he does. “I want to collar you.” His words throw me. I look up, knowing what he means, but unsure how it will work. I read about collaring, a ritual or ceremony where the Dom collars his Submissive, Slave or Brat. It shows she is his, and it symbolises the transfer of power from a submissive to a Dom. While I have no issues with this, I’m not so keen on wearing the collar around my own family, so before I agree, I need to know how mu
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Back downstairs, Jackson is cleaning the kitchen. Liam and Marcus sit talking, and the girls are in the playroom. I go to Jackson and help clean up quickly. I’m still smiling after last night and still wearing the collar. It gets a confused look from Liam. Marcus, however, has a look of respect and then laughs at me, playfully winking. I can’t help but laugh. Georgina looks pissed off with me, though. “Are you seriously going to wear that thing all the time? What will people think?” Her words are loud and cold. Turning, I smile at her gently, trying not to cause an argument. My reply is the best I can think of at the time. “That is the point, Georgina. I have given up giving a shit about what other people think. All that did was get me screwed over time and time again. I know what it symbolises; I know what happens in our life, in our bedroom. I know there is no shame in it, so if people have an issue or don’t like it, guess what, I don’t care.”
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Marcus is standing behind me, his arms wrapping around me. “Alena, are you okay? You sounded like you were being murdered.” My body trembles next to his. It felt so real, so, so real. I need to call Jackson. I need to make sure he is okay. Walking back into my room, I grab the phone and dial Jackson’s number, waiting for him to answer, but he doesn’t. Why isn’t he answering? Is this it? Has he gone for good? Will she come for the girls? “Alena, what are you doing? If you’re calling Jackson, there is no point. He is in meetings until after 2 am. You’re safe and fine. I am here.” “I just want to make sure Jackson is safe. That is all.” My fingers start redialing his number. Marcus sits next to me on the bed, his hand clasping around mine. “He is fine, totally safe Alena. He was in a meeting when I left. He is with loads of people. It was just a dream.” I wish his words comfort me. I need Jackson. I need him to hold me and tell
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Sitting, talking to Georgina, the conversation finally turns to Jackson and me. “I didn’t mean it disrespectfully. I care what you think, of course, I do, but it is mine and Jackson’s life.” I hug her, feeling awful for how I spoke to her before. “No, I am just jealous.” Her words are quiet. Wow, why would she be jealous? “You and Jackson are so close, so connected. You talk so openly about sex, life and everything. He knows what you want and need. Liam and I are more routine, the same thing every day. Reading up on it all, it is something I would love to have, but Liam, I doubt he is the sort to do it. Even just a small bit would be nice. Sex is kind of boring at the minute.” I look at her, shocked. Is she bored of Liam already? “What exactly is it that you want, Georgina? Have you ever spoken to him about it?” The first part reminds me of Jackson, the playroom, when I stand there naked and blindfolded, his words in my head. ‘Wh
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“Wake up Alena.” His hands are pushing harder on my chest. I have too much to live for. This is not going to take me after everything else. This is not how I will die! I start screaming. I am trying to pull myself back down, down to my body. My body jolts, eyes opening wide. I am lying on the pavement, Marcus looking over me, as I take a breath. Had I just died? “Alena.” Marcus’ voice makes me realise how real this is. His eyes are full of panic as he pulls me farther away from the car as we watch it explode. That could have been me! I feel fine. I’m not in pain, just shock. I could have died. I had died. I drove while drunk. These are country roads which is a good thing because, had it been a busy road, anyone could have gotten hurt. “How the hell did you survive that? We need to get you to the hospital.” My head begins shaking. He is not taking me to the hospital. I feel totally fine. “No hospital.” My words are quiet. “A
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I look back to Jackson. “Is Katy okay now?” I look at her. She looks well, so hopefully it was just a bug. “She is fine. What the hell were you thinking driving that drunk? Then refusing to go to the hospital?” My body jumps back. He is angry, shouting and angry, a side of Jackson I have never seen before. “Just punish me and get it over with.” My scream back at him doesn’t help. If anything, it makes me worse. “What the fuck, Alena. You know full well you never punish through anger, ever. I never have and never will.” He wouldn’t, and that is exactly why I love him and feel safe with him. Max got angry. He would punish me there and then through anger, even if it had nothing to do with me. Jackson, however, seems to get angry and walk away and come back after it had passed. No matter how hard I push, he refuses to punish me if he is angry. “Yet you’re shouting at me, which you never do.” I am too weak and in too much pain to ar
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We get to the hospital and the worst part is sitting for hours, waiting. I just want to go home. This is time in my life. Time that I won’t get back, and more than likely, it will lead to nothing, just me being told everything is okay and to go home. The nurse finally calls my name. Sitting in the room waiting for the doctor to start, I feel stupid and like I’m wasting their time. “So, I hear you were in a car accident? I need to ask some questions about the crash first if that is possible?” I nod, waiting for his questions. “Okay. Were you wearing a seatbelt?” “Yes.” I nod. I am not that stupid, and to me, it is a pointless question. It won’t change the damage caused, knowing if I did or not. “Good. Did the airbag go off okay?” “Yes.” These questions really are stupid in my eyes and a waste of time. “What happened? Did the car slide? Flip? If it flipped, how many times?” I can’t remember that. I know it slid
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