LOGIN(Chase)“She owns a quarter of a racehorse, Natasha. I think she has a right to know about it.”“She’s a child. She doesn’t have a right to know anything that ends with a horse in my kitchen.”The envelope is on the kitchen table between us. It’s been living on top of the fridge since Lily’s birthday, because that’s the one place in this house she can’t reach.My grandfather was told very clearly not to buy our daughter a horse. So he bought her a quarter of one, and he’s extremely pleased with himself.“He found a loophole,” I say.“He found a racehorse. It lives in a racing stable she’s never going to visit. It already has a name, and the name isn’t Spoon. If we tell her, the first thing she’ll ask is which part of it is hers.”“I’d tell her it’s the front. The front’s the good end.”“I told her the cake was the compromise. I’m not going back to her now to explain that your grandfather went over my head.”She doesn’t laugh at my joke, and she usually does. She’s had both hands aroun
(Natasha)“Did you get them?”Chase asks it before I’ve even shut the front door behind me.“Hello to you too. My flight was fine, thank you.”“Lily’s been asleep for hours. The cake’s in the fridge. It’s shaped like a horse and the ears are fragile, so open the door gently. Did you get them?”I put the brown bag down next to the hall table, taking my time doing it.The them Chase is referring to is one of the biggest names Doheny has on their books, and I’ve spent most of this week in San Francisco trying to lure them away.He’s barefoot in a tight t-shirt and sweatpants, staring at me like I’m about to read the winning lottery numbers. I’ve missed him, and I’ve just thought of a much better way to tell him this story.“Priya says to tell you the office finally has lamps everywhere. She bought one for every desk.”“That’s wonderful. I don’t care about the lamps.”“I’ll tell you all of it. But you’re going to earn it, one piece at a time.”I walk him backwards until he’s against the f
(Sonia)“Uncle Liam, you’re doing it again.”Lily is standing at the side of the stage with a clipboard, and she’s pointing her pencil at him.“What am I doing?” Liam asks.“You’re saying the words for them. Miss Alison said they have to say their own words.”“I was only showing the cow how to moo with feeling.”“She knows how to moo. She’s been practicing her mooing for weeks.”Lily writes something on her clipboard.“That’s two X’s. If you get three, you have to sit down and put your finger on your lips.”I’m on a chair made for a pre-schooler, with my knees up near my chin and a cap pulled down low.The kindergarten play starts in a few minutes, and most of the parents already have their phones out.Liam’s only here because the director threw him out of rehearsals for our film last week.He wrote the script, so he thinks he knows how every line should sound, and he kept saying them out loud for the actors.One of those actors has more awards than Liam has shirts.So he offered to h
(Hannah)“Everybody, this is Jade. She’s my girlfriend.”Elijah says it very fast, to the whole table at once, so nobody can ask him anything before he’s finished.He told me he was bringing a friend from the league to Sunday lunch, and I pictured a boy in muddy boots. He went to let his friend in, and he’s come back holding a girl’s hand.“I’ve known for weeks,” Elias says, before anybody else can speak. “I’d like that noted. I knew before his mother and before his father.”“Grandpa, please.”“I was planning to stare at you across this table until you confessed, boy. You’ve spoiled a very good afternoon for me.”My son has a girlfriend. He’s blushing so hard it must hurt, and he still hasn’t let go of her hand.He didn’t tell me. I mind that more than I’m going to show at Gloria’s table.He also looks happier than I’ve seen him in a long time, so I get up and shake her hand.“I’m Hannah, Elijah’s mom. It’s lovely to meet you, Jade. I’m glad you came.”“Thank you for having me. Elijah
(Clarice)“Grandma! The baby’s called Will!”Lily runs into my hall and stops in front of me, out of breath and very proud of herself.“I know, sweetheart. Your Uncle Nathanial phoned me last night.”Her whole face falls.“I wanted to be the one to tell you, I was looking forward to it.”Nathanial said it very fast. Gloria was obviously standing right next to him. She said hello at the start and nothing after that, and it wasn’t hard to guess who’d made him call.I told him it was a good name, because it is.Will was a wonderful man who deserved so much better than I gave him. It’s only right that his legacy continues.“Tell me anyway,” I say. “Nobody’s said it to my face yet. It isn’t the same on the phone.”She stands up straight so she can do it properly.“The baby’s called Will.”“Thank you. That’s much better in person.”Eleanor is coming up the path behind her. She offered to drive Lily out here to save Natasha the trip, and I thought that was kind of her.Her driver is behind h
(Gloria)“He’s had a long turn.”“A long turn at what?”“At you.”Diego is standing beside the bed in the middle of the night with his arms folded. He’s come to complain about his brother.His brother is asleep on my chest and has no idea he’s in trouble.“He’s very new,” I tell Diego. “He doesn’t know how to be anywhere else yet.”“I can show him.”“You can show him in the morning.”Nathanial sits up next to me. He’s awake because I’m awake, and he’s been doing that since we brought Will home.“Diego’s right. You’ve had him for hours. Give him to me.”He’s been taking things off me for months. I let him every time. I was too frightened to argue about who carried what.Tonight I hand Will over because my arms are tired.Diego climbs up into the warm place his brother left and puts his head under my chin.“I’ve got some rules for him,” he says.“Let’s hear them,” Nathanial says.“Daddy has to read my stories first. His come after.”“That’s fair. Yours will come first.”“And mine has to
(Natasha)Every step through the towering glass doors of Warren Global feels like a dull blade sawing straight through bone.At least that’s how it made me feel that day.The swelling in my knee stretches the fabric of my trousers so tight it almost pulses. Heat radiates from the joint in slow, sic
(Natasha)The temperature always seems to drop when I cross the threshold of the Warren Estate.Cold enough to pass for a museum. Or a prison.A brilliantly designed one.People say grief is loud. That it makes you scream, cry, break things.Maybe that’s true for some people. I didn’t cry. Becaus
The plastic chair in the maternity ward is a special kind of hell. I’m fairly certain the chair was designed by someone who hates pregnant women.I remember sitting there with both hands pressed against the heavy curve of my stomach, trying to breathe through the pressure in my ribs when the baby
(Natasha)Three weeks after Shell Cove and Chase is in my spare room four nights a week.It started on a Wednesday.He dropped Lily off.He stayed for dinner.Lily fell asleep on his arm during her bath, and he stood in the hallway holding her with the wet flannel still in his hand, and asked me, v







