CHAPTER FOUR:THINK WHATEVER YOU WANT

Amelia's POV

We married four days later in a quiet ceremony at the courthouse. I wore a simple white dress that Victoria Blackwood had sent to my apartment without a note. Adrian wore a black suit and the same cold expression he always wore. A judge read the vows in a bored voice, and we repeated them like two strangers ordering lunch.

When the judge told Adrian to kiss the bride, he leaned down and pressed his lips to my cheek. It lasted barely a second. His skin smelled like cedar and rain, and my heart gave one hard, foolish thump. I told myself it was nerves.

My father stood in the back row with a satisfied smile. Adrian's lawyers had already paid his debts, and his shoulders looked lighter than they had in years. He did not hug me when it ended. He only nodded once, the way a man nods when a business deal closes.

I did not speak to him again that day.

The Blackwood mansion stood behind iron gates on the Upper East Side. It was bigger than the entire block where I had grown up. A long driveway curved through gardens that looked like paintings. Marble steps led up to a front door tall enough for a giant. I stared out of the car window with my hands clenched in my lap.

"You will get used to it," Adrian said.

"I do not think I will," I said.

"Then you will pretend very well." He opened the car door and stepped out without waiting for me.

A housekeeper named Mrs. Dalton showed me to my room. It was on the second floor, and it was larger than my father's whole apartment. The bed was white and enormous, and the windows overlooked a garden full of roses. I stood in the center of the room and did not dare to touch anything.

My old clothes fit into one small suitcase. I unpacked them into a closet that could have held a hundred dresses. Then I sat on the edge of the bed and stared at my hands. I felt like a thief who had broken into a palace and was waiting for the guards.

Dinner that night was served in a room with a table long enough for twenty people. Only five chairs were occupied. Richard sat at the head, and Victoria sat at the other end. Adrian sat across from me, and beside him sat a young man with a warm, crooked smile.

"This is my cousin, Daniel Hayes," Adrian said.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Amelia," Daniel said cheerfully. "I want you to know that I voted for you."

"Voted for me?" I asked.

"In the family group chat," he said. "Everyone else wanted a duchess. I held out for someone interesting."

I laughed before I could stop myself. Daniel grinned, and Adrian rolled his eyes. For the first time since the courthouse, my shoulders relaxed.

Victoria did not laugh. She sat very straight and spoke in a polite, careful voice. She asked about my family and my education and my interests. Every question sounded kind, but every answer made her eyes grow colder. When I told her I had worked at a diner, she set down her fork very softly.

"How interesting," she said.

I knew exactly what she meant. I kept my face calm and ate my soup. Richard said almost nothing during dinner, but he watched me the entire time. I felt his eyes on my face like a weight.

When the meal ended, I excused myself and walked toward the library. I wanted a quiet place to breathe. The room was dark and full of old books that smelled like leather and dust. I ran my fingers along the spines and tried to feel calm.

The door opened behind me, and I knew who it was before I turned around. Adrian stood in the doorway with a thin file in his hand. His jaw was tight, and his eyes burned with something I had not seen before.

"My investigator finished his report this afternoon," he said.

My heart dropped into my stomach. I looked at the file and then at his face. I already knew what was inside.

He crossed the room and tossed the folder on the table in front of me. It slid open, and photographs spilled out across the polished wood. I saw hotel lobbies and dates and a picture of me leaving a building at dawn. I saw my own tired face looking back at me.

"I read it twice," he said. His voice was low and dangerous. "I wanted to be sure I understood."

"Adrian," I whispered.

"You took money from men." Each word came out like a stone. "You sold yourself to strangers, and then you let your father stand in my office and pretend to be shocked."

"He did not know," I said. "I never told him."

"Do not lie to me." His voice cracked like ice. "I thought you were a victim of your father's greed. I felt sorry for you for one whole day. I should have seen what you were."

"What I am?" I asked.

"A prostitute," he said coldly.

The word hit me harder than a slap. I stood perfectly still and felt it settle into my skin. Heat rose behind my eyes, but I did not let it fall. I had survived worse than a man's contempt.

I wanted to tell him everything. I wanted to explain the empty cupboards and the rent notices and the nights I cried in strange bathrooms. I wanted to tell him I had been hungry in a way he could never imagine. The words rose in my throat, and I looked into his cold eyes and swallowed every one.

He did not deserve the truth. He had already decided who I was.

"Think whatever you want," I said quietly. "You will anyway."

"I intend to," he said.

"Then we understand each other." I picked up the file and held it out to him. "Is there anything else you wanted to say?"

He stared at me for a long moment. Something flickered across his face, but it was gone before I could name it. He took the folder from my hand without touching my fingers.

"This marriage is a contract," he said. "I will never mistake it for anything else."

"Neither will I," I answered.

I walked out of the library with my back straight and my shoulders squared. I climbed the stairs without hurrying and closed my bedroom door behind me. Then I sat on the edge of the huge white bed and finally let myself shake.

I cried quietly into my pillow so the walls would not hear. When I was finished, I wiped my face and opened my phone. I sent a small amount of money to Mrs. Alvarez, who lived on the third floor of my old building. She had three children and no heat.

Then I lay awake and listened to the huge house settle around me. I told myself this would only last one year. I told myself I could survive anything for twelve months. I did not know that the hardest part of the year had not even begun.