Chapter Two

"Okay, how long?"

He kept a sealed lip, uncertainty showing in his stare which refused to meet hers, " I don't know, I can't put a time limit"

The need to reach out and touch him was desperate, so Serena did not fight it, touching Simon had always calmed her down even in their worst days, well that is how they fell in love after all.

Her heart beat erratically inside her chest that the constant vibration was painful, but she hoped Simon could hear it, Serena hoped Simon could hear how loudly and profound her heart beats for him and him alone.

Sliding her hand up his fabrics, revealing his defined pecs, Simon was pleased to find that his heart was just out of control as hers.

"Baby, all that matter right now is how much I love you and your love for me too, we will get through this together okay?"

Every couple had their scary moments, the thought of losing a baby, a partner, divorce, cheating is no doubt the scary moments of every couple, statically it take more than one or two years for any couple to seek for a divorce, Serena and Simon no doubt was having their scary moments earlier than expected and no doubt she was very sure they will overcome it.

Simon's face was just above hers, now holding back the tears that shine through the thick lashes she always gets jealous of, his tears gave her the courage to reach up to his face, his eyes automatically shut as she touched his face, but not a single tear slipped through.

"I don't think I love you thesame way anymore"

Shock travelled up from her heart to her hand making her jump, an immediate wash of humiliation drained the blood from her face.

Serena had never being humiliated in her entire life, " Yyou always tell me you love me!"

Simon let out a smile she had never seen before, he had this curel smile on his face, " I have tried serena, you have no idea how long I have been forcing myself to say those words to you just to make you feel happy"

"Excuse me?....."

Twenty two years of her life, Serena has never been punched in the stomach before but now she imagine this is exactly what it feels like. She backed away from him like his body was fire and she was gasoline, if they were to touch.....

"....so, you are saying you have been lying about loving me?"

"Serena, I thought about my life, and about how people have made me see life the way it really is, and even what you've said to me most times when we have few misunderstandings, wether that decision of me wanting to be out of any entanglements or wanting not to live just a simple boring life makes me an awful boyfriend or an amazing human, I don't know but you are right and I will do anything to achieve such, I could go out of the way for anyone except you, I don't think I can"

The realization of what was really happening began to sink with an emerging panic, it crawled up to Serena's throat, its nail punching through her soft flesh leaving hole for the agony to pour out, " well, then....then tell me what I can do to make it better?" She began in quick, uneven breath, ".... Tell me what you need me to do and I will start fixing it"

Serena had given five years of her life to this relationship and she could not start all over again, not now! The thought of dating again Nauseated her, making her want to climb on Simon more.

"I don't want you to do anything Serena..." he drugged her name out like it was a stain on his tongue, ".... We want different things in life, we always have and you maybe happy with settling but iam not"

"Settling??"

"Wait you think being with me is....... settling?"

"No! I" Simon cut himself off himself off, clenching his finger together as if all his furstration was contained in that fists and his eyes made contact with Serena, " ..... Don't twist my word like that"

"No, iam not meaning to, OMG!" The last thing Serena wanted was to make him get mad and that is what she is already on the verge of doing, " Iam sorry Simon, I didn't mean to twist your word, iam just trying to understand what I can do"

He stood quiet for a moment, Serena grabbed onto the solace his silence brought, his silence was an indication that he was thinking..... Considering, and that was all she needed, a simple consideration of what the last five years of their lives together meant to him.

"Dammit!" Simon exploded, slamming the suitcase on the floor, that action raised alarm through Serena's chest and a gasp came out of her lip, he turned away from her that all she could only see was his back rising and falling with each labored breath.

"Serena iam trying to do this nicely as I can but you are not making it easy" simon turned and faced her again, and when he did she began to shake, his eyes were dark, void of any emotions, his lips thinned and serena's heart suddenly became very scared.