Mag-log inCADEN'S POV
It hurt something inside of me, seeing her like that, scared to the bones, unsure of herself and looking like she was expecting something to jump out of her locker and attack her.
In that instant all I'd been able to think about was how much I've failed her, both as her best friend and as the guy who's loosing every bit and piece of himself to her.
Sappy, I know, but it had been exactly how I'd felt in the moment.
I can understand how she'd felt then, t
CADEN'S POVI know what she's asking but the answer to her question is lodged in my throat, not coming up and not going down, only suffocating me like those nightmares I beg to wake from and hear nothing in response except my own thudding heart and my laboured breath.Time pass, the question condensing in the air, getting thicker and heavier in its entirety and I just feel so small, s feeling I've avoided like the plague in these recent and brighter times.She sits up on the bed, dropping my hand eventually like I'd wanted at some point, but the waft of cold breeze that cools it off of the tiny balls of perspiration that had built in them from contact, reminded me why this is the last thing I want.She says nothing, doesn't ask me again or try to push me fo tell her about the hellish years that had followed leaving here and the nightmares that had built after it.Just nothing.She just hugs her knees to herself and watches me and I see it in her quiet gaze, the resignation and resolve
CADEN'S POVI know what she's asking but the answer to her question is lodged in my throat, not coming up and not going down, only suffocating me like those nightmares I beg to wake from and hear nothing in response except my own thudding heart and my laboured breath.Time pass, the question condensing in the air, getting thicker and heavier in its entirety and I just feel so small, s feeling I've avoided like the plague in these recent and brighter times.She sits up on the bed, dropping my hand eventually like I'd wanted at some point, but the waft of cold breeze that cools it off of the tiny balls of perspiration that had built in them from contact, reminded me why this is the last thing I want.She says nothing, doesn't ask me again or try to push me fo tell her about the hellish years that had followed leaving here and the nightmares that had built after it.Just nothing.She just hugs her knees to herself and watches me and I see it in her quiet gaze, the resignation and resolve
CADEN'S POVI know what she's asking but the answer to her question is lodged in my throat, not coming up and not going down, only suffocating me like those nightmares I beg to wake from and hear nothing in response except my own thudding heart and my laboured breath.Time pass, the question condensing in the air, getting thicker and heavier in its entirety and I just feel so small, s feeling I've avoided like the plague in these recent and brighter times.She sits up on the bed, dropping my hand eventually like I'd wanted at some point, but the waft of cold breeze that cools it off of the tiny balls of perspiration that had built in them from contact, reminded me why this is the last thing I want.She says nothing, doesn't ask me again or try to push me fo tell her about the hellish years that had followed leaving here and the nightmares that had built after it.Just nothing.She just hugs her knees to herself and watches me and I see it in her quiet gaze, the resignation and resolve
CADEN'S POVI know what she's asking but the answer to her question is lodged in my throat, not coming up and not going down, only suffocating me like those nightmares I beg to wake from and hear nothing in response except my own thudding heart and my laboured breath.Time pass, the question condensing in the air, getting thicker and heavier in its entirety and I just feel so small, s feeling I've avoided like the plague in these recent and brighter times.She sits up on the bed, dropping my hand eventually like I'd wanted at some point, but the waft of cold breeze that cools it off of the tiny balls of perspiration that had built in them from contact, reminded me why this is the last thing I want.She says nothing, doesn't ask me again or try to push me fo tell her about the hellish years that had followed leaving here and the nightmares that had built after it.Just nothing.She just hugs her knees to herself and watches me and I see it in her quiet gaze, the resignation and resolve
CADEN'S POVI know what she's asking but the answer to her question is lodged in my throat, not coming up and not going down, only suffocating me like those nightmares I beg to wake from and hear nothing in response except my own thudding heart and my laboured breath.Time pass, the question condensing in the air, getting thicker and heavier in its entirety and I just feel so small, s feeling I've avoided like the plague in these recent and brighter times.She sits up on the bed, dropping my hand eventually like I'd wanted at some point, but the waft of cold breeze that cools it off of the tiny balls of perspiration that had built in them from contact, reminded me why this is the last thing I want.She says nothing, doesn't ask me again or try to push me fo tell her about the hellish years that had followed leaving here and the nightmares that had built after it.Just nothing.She just hugs her knees to herself and watches me and I see it in her quiet gaze, the resignation and resolve
JADE'S POV I try hard not to look at him differently, not to feel so much hurt on his behalf and not blame myself so much for not being there when he needed someone the most, but it's sooo fucking difficult not to, not after listening to everything he just said. I had no idea he'd gone through that, alone and now all the times I spent hating his guts and resenting him seems a waste and stupid. Every day, I imagined he was enjoying his super perfect life, looking down his nose at the rest of us measely teens but his life had been anything but perfect. It'd been all bright on the outside and yet very dark, lonely and hollow on the inside that it must have been so fucking difficult. Somehow, I'm glad I skipped school today and is spending the day with him, a weak attempt at making up for lost times and a silent apology for....everything. Silently, I'm grateful that his book went missing because he would never have told me any of this if it hadn't, though I hope to hell and back tha
JADE'S POV I came to school this morning to find the word "whore" boldly spray painted on my blue colored locker in bright red paint.And every fucking person in that hallway just stood there, shamelessly gawking at it and laughing......again.God, for once I just wish I can snap a finger, blink an ey
Then why do you act like it every time I so much as come close to you. You've been tense since coming in here, like you're scared I'll bite."I try to deny his accusation but the words wont just come."Matt...."I whisper, even though I imagined his name sounding more firm and sure before I said it."Ju
JADE'S POVFalling asleep in a house that's not mine, no matter how comfortable and warm it is in its welcome, I realise, is difficult for me and no matter what I try, I find it impossible to slip into the sweet arms of the oblivion that is sleep.I toss and turn in the queen sized, poster bed I imagi
JADE'S POVHe returned from his closet fully dressed, and I imagine the whole pajama get up, buttoned to the top and all, is for my benefit.Knowing Matt like I do, it's obvious he really doesn't want to do anything that will bother me and I respect him a little bit more for it.He even had the decency







