The Alpha's Desire

I close my eyes and slow my breathing, letting the sounds of the forest come to me. I smell the scent of a deer and a family of rabbits. Prey but I have more important things to focus on today.

I open my eyes and scan the clearing.

Red eyes glow from the darkness among the bushes.

I growl at the intruder.

The other wolves around me see it too, and we all crouch down, preparing for a fight.

The animal steps out of the bushes, and I recognize the black fur and the white paws.

He’s a wolf, but not one of us.

He’s a rogue, and he looks dangerous.

I step forward, baring my teeth and snarling.

The rogue growls and crouches down in response to us, prepared to attack.

“This is your last warning, rogue,” I say. “Run!”

The rogue leaps forward and attacks.

I dodge to the side and, in one motion, snap his neck as he passes me. He collapses on the ground.

“Do you think he’s dead?” my best friend, Erin asks.

“I assume,” I say. That’s not enough though. “Careful.”

The other wolves and I approach him cautiously, just in case.

I turn him over. His black eyes stare unblinkingly back up at me.

I looked at my fellow wolve and they look away.

“You’re terrifying, you know that?” Erin says. She shakes her head. “And only eighteen. It’s almost unfathomable.”

She’s not the only one who feels that way, though she’s the only one who admits it. I’m a feared and respected warrior.

And I’ve earned every bit of that respect.

“What can I say?” I shrug. “The rogues have invaded our town, uninvited. It’s my responsibility to clean them up. This is what it means to be a werewolf.”

Usually, this task falls to my father, the leader of the pack. He would round up the rogues and make sure they were eliminated.

But over time, this has become my job. I am the one who has to enforce the rules, protect my pack, and clean up the mess. Maybe because he knows I’m fiercer than the rest. Fiercer, even, than my brothers.

“It helps that my father and uncle have taught me well.”

“They sure have,” Blake, my younger brother says. “And you’ll teach me too, right?”

“Of course,” I smile. “You and Makayla.”

My old brothers wouldn’t listen to me, but my younger brother and sister will.

I look at the other wolves and say, “Come on. We have a rogue to bury.”

*

Walking to the burial site gives me time to think. Too much time to think.

“I know what you’re thinking about,” Erin says.

"Just say yes," she says. "Just say yes and I'll leave you alone about it."

"I'm not going to say yes now," I tell her. "I'm not saying no," I tell her. "I'm not saying yes. I need more time."

I know that my answer will be one of the most important decisions of my life. It will mean accepting a mate, and the Alpha at that. The new Alpha of the pack now that my father has stepped down. But something is holding me back.

Erin lowers her voice. "Sasha," she says, "the Alpha wants to give you a chance. He wants you to be his mate. He wants to give you everything."

"I know," I tell her. "I get it."

"Do you get it?" she asks. "Do you really get it? You get the chance to be the Alpha's mate. It is an honor."

"I know," I say without enthusiasm.

"It's a privilege," she tells me. "You may think you don't want it now, but you don't know what you want now. You're young. You're only just now becoming a wolf. You're not even a full adult yet."

"I'm not a child," I tell her.

"You still think like a child sometimes though. You still act like a child sometimes. All you really know is how to kill."

Ouch. That hurts. I love Erin, but she can cut too close to home sometimes.

Is it true? Am I really that unfeeling?

The burial complete, our pack resumes patrol.

Soon I spot more rogues and kill them effortlessly. Too effortlessly. It is as if eliminating one brings forth more.

The wind howls, covering up their cries of pain. We proceed deeper into the forest, too deep. Way past where it is safe. But I want to test myself.

“Shouldn’t we…go back?” Erin asks. I can hear the fear in her voice.

I keep going.

I need to test myself. Always. To push the boundaries. To keep myself sharp. To make myself better. Faster. Stronger.

I hear a growl.

Many growls.

Too late, I realize we are surrounded.

An ambush.

A wolf leaps out of the woods, looms within striking distance. I slash my claws through his throat. He falls to the ground.

I turn to the others. They are all circling us, snarling and snapping their jaws.

I roar and leap forward, slashing again and again.

They fall, one by one.

One werewolf snarls and claws at my arm. I slash, dragging my claws across the vulnerable skin around his throat. He gurgles and falls back.

The werewolf beside him lashes out at me in fury. I ducked and lunge, sinking my claws into his shoulder. He howls and spins away.

More rogues come flooding out of the wood. Beside me, Erin does what she can, as do the others in my pack. But there are just too many of them.

Then, a paw hits me in the side. I stumble and fall. I roll, kick, and slash, fighting off the werewolves that come at me anew from every side.

I roll to my feet and twist to the right, slashing another werewolf across the face. He jumps back, howling in pain, blood pouring from his cheek.

I turn to face all of them, slashing with my claws, screaming as loud as I can.

But now they can see the darkness in my eyes. The death.

And none dare come close.

One by one, they all retreat.

As the blood pulses in my veins, I feel strong, fast, powerful.

I slowly come back to my senses. I am covered in blood. Warm, running over my paws. I lick some of it off my fur. It tastes like metal, like rust. It makes me feel strong, like nothing can hurt me.

I turn and see Erin and the others watching me in wonder.

I run through the woods, away from the bodies of the dead wolves.

I run on, through the howling wind, into the night, through the darkness.

And wonder about the darkness within me.

Soon, I will return to my pack, and to the Alpha waiting for me. Waiting for an answer.

Will I accept him as my mate?

Can I really be a mate to anyone?