Find a man

 Laura

I barely recognized the woman staring back at me from the mirror.

For several long seconds, I simply stood there, unable to look away. The silver gown hugged every supple curve of my body so tightly that I was terrified one wrong movement would send the seams bursting apart. 

My dark hair had been curled and pinned into an elegant style that cascaded over one shoulder. Layers of makeup concealed the flaws I had spent years seeing every time I looked into a mirror.

The woman staring back at me looked beautiful. It was so strange.

I lifted a trembling hand and touched my cheek and the reflection copied the movement. It was still me. Yet somehow it wasn't.

I had never been dressed up like this before. Never attended a ball. Never been given the opportunity to. All of these things were for my sister and not for a woman like me. What if I mess everything up? A nervous flutter filled my stomach.

Tonight was the annual mating ball and this year, our pack was hosting it.

Powerful Alphas, Betas, heirs, and unmated wolves from neighboring packs had spent weeks traveling here. By now, hundreds of guests were probably filling the grand ballroom downstairs.

My heart pounded fast and hard in my chest. This was my chance. My first and only chance to find my fated mate or any man who would have me or my life as I know it will be over when my father throws me out.

Perhaps tonight I will find my mate. Perhaps, for once in my life, the Moon Goddess will take pity on me and  someone among the guests will be my mate.

Someone who would look at me and see more than my size. Someone who would see Laura. Not the embarrassment or disappointment and not the daughter my parents wished had never been born.

A small smile tugged at my lips before uncertainty quickly smothered it. What if nobody wanted me? What if I didn't find my mate? What if every man took one look at me and turned away?

The thought made my chest ache. Father had made it painfully clear that tonight was not optional. I had to find a mate or a husband. If I didn't, he would choose one for me.

He already had someone in mind—a man he got along with well but whom I had never even met. Father didn't care whether I liked him. He simply wanted me to look presentable enough to please the husband he had chosen.

Still, a small part of me clung to hope. What if someone else chose me instead? What if the Moon Goddess sent my mate to save me?

Otherwise, I could end up married to an aging Alpha, a widower, or a man old enough to be my grandfather. The possibilities haunted me. After all, Father never missed an opportunity to remind me that I looked four times older than my twenty-two years.

A sharp knock interrupted my thoughts and I spun around as the bedroom door opened. Madeline, my personal maid, stepped inside my room.

"Lady Laura," she said gently. "Your parents are waiting."

My eyes widened. "They are?"

The maid nodded and panic immediately surged through me.

"Oh no."

I gathered my skirts and rushed toward the door. The moment I took my third step, disaster struck. My heel caught the carpet.

A startled squeak escaped me as I stumbled forward.

For one horrifying second, I was certain I was about to fall face-first onto the floor. I managed to catch myself at the last moment, grabbing the edge of a nearby table.

My heart hammered wildly against my ribs. Madeline rushed forward, her eyes wide with panic.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes," I answered quickly, my cheeks burning. "I think so."

Moon Goddess. These shoes were deadly. I glanced down at the towering heels strapped to my feet.

According to Mother, taller women were more desirable.

Since I was neither tall nor graceful, she had insisted I wear them.

I took a deep breath before carefully stepping into the hallway. One foot and then another. I focused all my attention on walking.

If I fell in front of my parents, they would never let me leave the house.

‘Stay home, Laura. We don't want you going out and disgracing this family.’

The familiar words echoed through my mind. I had heard them so many times over the years that I could practically hear Mother's voice saying them. Unfortunately, they weren't the only words permanently engraved into my memory.

‘Oh, Moon Goddess. Couldn't you have blessed me with two perfect daughters? What have I done in my past life to deserve this?’

‘Sister, why can't you be like me? If you copied everything I did, maybe you'd become perfect too.’

I could repeat every insult word for word, every criticism and every cruel remark. I was supposed to be numbed by now after hearing this my whole life but no matter how many times my family hurt me, it never stopped hurting. I wasn't numb. I doubted I ever would be.

As I carefully descended the staircase, I found myself wondering something I had asked countless times before.

Why? Why couldn't I have been born into an ordinary family? Why did I have to be born into the Alpha's family?

A family obsessed with appearances.

A family where beauty and perfection was celebrated like a blessing from the Moon Goddess herself. A family where I was everything unacceptable.

I was too large, too clumsy, too awkward, too quiet and too different. While my twin sister, Leslie, was perfect.

She was beautiful, charming, graceful, and confident.

The future Alpha. The pride of the Soul Moon Pack.

Sometimes I couldn't help wondering what life would have been like if I had been more like her. Maybe Father would smile when he looked at me. Maybe Mother would introduce me proudly to all of her important friends. Maybe I wouldn't have spent most of my life hidden inside these walls.

"Hurry up, Laura. Don't keep us waiting!" Mother's sharp voice cut through my thoughts the moment she heard me approaching. "It's your first time out in years. You had better not disgrace this family."

My stomach immediately tightened. When I reached the bottom of the staircase, I finally saw them. As always, my family looked flawless.

Father stood tall in an expensive black suit embroidered with silver detailing. Power radiated from him so naturally that people seemed drawn to him without realizing it.

Mother looked breathtaking in a sapphire gown that perfectly matched her eyes.

Beside them stood Leslie. My twin. Her golden dress glittered beneath the lights while her dark hair fell over her shoulders in perfect waves.

Together they looked like the picture of an ideal Alpha family.

And then there was me, the forgotten daughter and the hidden one. I expected Leslie to smirk when she saw me.

Instead, she froze. For a brief second, genuine surprise flashed across her face and her eyes widened as she stared. Then her expression sharpened.

Leslie tilted her head thoughtfully. “The makeup artists did a wonderful job,” she said with a smile. “I almost didn’t recognize you.”

I thought it would end there, but I should have known better. My sister never missed an opportunity to make things bad for me.

"Why do you look so different?" she asked, her gaze sweeping over me. "What if a man accepts you tonight and then decides to return you after seeing you without all that makeup?" she continued before turning toward Father with a sweet smile. "Father, perhaps she should remove it now. It would save everyone future disappointment."

My face burned. The cruel possibility had already crossed my mind several times while the maids were preparing me. Now, here was my sister pointing it out.

What if she was right? What if someone liked this version of me but hated the real one?

Father studied me silently. For one foolish second, I hoped he might defend me. Instead, he shrugged.

"She can wear makeup every day for the rest of her life if that's what it takes to marry her off."

The words landed like a physical blow. I lowered my gaze.

The beautiful girl from the mirror suddenly felt very far away.

Mother simply turned toward the door and father followed.

Leslie shot me a victorious look before hurrying after them.

I remained rooted to the spot for a moment. I truly didn't understand why Leslie hated me. She had everything and she was beautiful, popular, admired and the future Alpha while had nothing. Yet somehow she always found ways to take whatever little thing I managed to enjoy.

The only exception was medicine. Thankfully, Leslie found healing boring otherwise she probably would have taken that from me too.

"Where is that fatso?" Mother's irritated voice rang through the entrance hall from outside. "Why aren't you hurrying up?"

I flinched before quickly gathering my skirts in both hands and hurriedly rushing toward the front doors.

My heart pounded louder with every step. Tonight would change everything. I could feel it.

As I stepped out after my family, I lowered my head and whispered a silent prayer.

Please, Moon Goddess, let me find my mate tonight.