4 - My Name Isn't Lily

LUCY'S POV

I was holding back tears as I digested what he had just said to me.

Nia was howling in excitement. I had never been given choices or freedom, even when I lived with my pack.

Even though my father was disgusted with my existence, he had assigned me a trainer since I was a pup.

He always said a wolf was no good if they couldn’t fight for their pack. It was my saving grace.

Training was my outlet, my way of letting out steam, much-needed anger and frustration for the way my life had been.

Did I want to be a warrior for this pack?

Did I want to remain an assistant for this Alpha?

Was there something else out there for me besides all of this?

Then, there was still the concern about my father coming to one of these galas. What would Leander think if he found out?

At that moment, I wondered if I should just tell him everything, but the words wouldn’t surface.

I cleared my throat and adjusted myself in my seat as Leander stared at me, waiting for a response.

“If I remained as your assistant, would I be allowed to join any of the training sessions?”

What can I say? I was given some freedom, and I didn’t want to waste it.

A she-wolf could have her cake and eat it, right?

He chuckled, not in a way that was mocking, but almost as if he were proud of me.

“I didn’t exactly take you for a fighter, Lily, but I suppose it’s good for every wolf to know how to defend themselves if needed. We could work something out so you can attend some of the training if you’d like. I will give you until the day before my son's Alpha ceremony to make your final decision on what you’d like to do. However, if you are going to stay here, we will have to swear you into the pack," Leander smiles.

His last sentence hit me in the chest. I had no idea what would happen if he swore me into his pack.

Alphas don’t typically leave their pack; in fact, I had never heard of any Alpha leaving their pack for another.

They’re raised to run their pack when they’re of age or at the least contribute substantially if they're not the first born.

They live and breathe that life.

Would my mark for this pack form on my wrist like anyone else's, or would it replace my current pack mark on my chest?

This would raise a lot of red flags and questions I could never get away with lying about.

My father would feel the severed bond.

This could work in my favor if he assumed that meant I was dead, or it could cause him to look harder for me if he thought that I had joined another pack.

I jumped slightly as Leander pushed his chair back and stood up.

“Come here,” he motioned to his side.

“Since Beta Seth is present as a witness, we can swear you in now. I know that you aren’t the type to draw attention, so I assume you’re okay with this being informal,” he added.

Holy shit, he wasn’t joking.

He wanted to do this right now.

My legs felt wobbly as I stood up and walked over.

“Wait, Alpha Leander, I ... my name isn’t Lily. I haven’t had the best record of being treated well in other packs. My name is all that I had left for myself, so I tell people my name is Lily, but it’s not," I say shakily.

My cheeks were burning from the admission, but I knew he couldn’t swear me in by the wrong name, it wouldn’t work, and he gave me no choice.

He chuckled, much to my relief.

“Well, you were right, Alpha,” Seth said with his own small chuckle.

'I told you he knew something,' Nia said.

“Wait, you knew?” This was the only thing I could manage to say.

“You don’t always respond to Lily. I’ve had to call out to you multiple times as if you didn’t realize I was speaking to you in the first place,” Leander explained. I frowned.

Apparently, I wasn’t as good at lying as I thought.

“It’s Lucy, Lucy Knight,” I said, hoping he didn’t correlate my last name with my father.

It wasn’t an extremely rare last name, so I had that on my side.

“Lucy suits you better. Is there anything else you want to tell me, Lucy? Honesty and trust are important, especially as an assistant to the Alpha,” Leander said with a grave look on his face.

I really did want to tell him at that moment.

What was I going to say?

I’m the Alpha daughter of Kragen Knight, heir of the Silver Moon Pack.

I ran away because I watched him kill my mother, and I feared he would kill me, too.

That kind of accusation could get you killed without undeniable proof.

My memory was far less than what anyone would consider proof, especially since he had never claimed me as his child. For all anyone knew, he was childless, heirless.

He had tried for years to get my mother pregnant again, but it never happened.

As much as I had wanted to belong somewhere, this was going to be sticky and I had no idea what was going to happen to my mark when he swore me in.