Chapter 3: The Heartbeat She Cannot Share

Serena

I'm unable to go to sleep, not really.

*He hurt me last night. But he's still my husband. And this is still his child, whatever it turns out to be. One home test isn't enough to build anything on.*

By the time the sun comes up, I've decided. I need to know for certain.

I won't go anywhere near Blackthorn's healers. The Moon Cradle already declared me barren in front of the entire pack last night, If I walk into the infirmary this morning claiming pregnancy, it'll be mockery within the hour.

So I use one of my usual Luna errands as cover, tell the guards I have supply matters to check on outside the territory, and drive myself to a private clinic two towns over where no one knows my face.

...

"The test we ran is positive," the doctor says, setting it down on the tray beside me. "Same as what you took at home."

"I need something more, doctor. Is there something else you can do? Today, right now."

She studies me, then nods. "We can do an ultrasound. It won't tell us much this early, but it'll show us something."

"Let's do it. Please."

...

She presses the wand against my stomach, watching the screen more than she watches me. "There." She points. A small flickering shape, meaningless until she turns up the volume and I hear a heartbeat.

"You're seven weeks gone," she says. "That's your baby's heartbeat you're hearing."

"Say that again."

She smiles, gentle, like she's used to this reaction. "It's real. Seven weeks along, strong heartbeat, everything looks exactly as it should."

I lie there listening to it, fast and steady.

“There’s a whole heartbeat in there,” I whisper, one hand pressed to my stomach, my eyes growing watery. “The Moon Cradle couldn’t find you, but you’re here.”

"Would you like copies of the images?" the doctor asks.

"Yes, and the report. Everything." I sit up, pulling my coat back around myself. "And please, I need you to keep this visit private. Completely private. No records shared, and nothing sent anywhere Blackthorn could reach it."

"You have my word."

I drive home already rehearsing what I'll say to Kael, letting myself believe that medical proof might be enough to make the council suspend the Covenant before it goes any further.

Instead, I come home to find servants carrying trunks and ceremonial chests down the hallway toward the guest wing.

"What is this?" I stop one of them in the corridor.

She won't meet my eyes. "The Blood Consort's belongings, Luna. Alpha Kael approved her moving in this morning."

*He approved it? He couldn't wait to talk to me about it first?*

I find him in the receiving room with Lyra and two elders. I don't bother to knock as I walk in.

"Get out," I say to the elders. They hesitate, glancing at Kael instead of me. "I said get out!"

Kael waves them off, and they go quickly, leaving just the three of us.

"She's staying in the guest wing," Kael says, standing, already trying to get ahead of my anger. "Nothing has happened, Serena. Nothing will, I promise you."

"That's not the point, Kael. The point is I came home to find her trunks in my hallway, and I had no idea any of this was happening until I almost tripped over them."

Lyra stands there the whole time, hands folded, her expression carefully arranged. Then something sharper slips through.

"None of this would be necessary," she says, voice bored and smooth, "if Blackthorn already had an heir. Six years is a long time to wait, Luna."

"Careful." I turn on her before I can stop myself. "You're a guest in this house, Lyra. Not a judge of it."

"Lyra." Kael's voice snaps across the room. "You will speak to Serena with respect, whatever the Covenant grants you. She is still Blackthorn's Luna. Leave us."

Lyra bows, that same ugly performance from last night, and lets herself out without another word.

I'm too tired, too angry, too finished with waiting for the right moment.

"The Covenant needs to end." I pull the folded report and the ultrasound image from inside my coat and push it into his hands. "I'm pregnant, Kael. I heard the heartbeat of our child myself this morning."

*Now. Say something now. Be happy with me, pull me into your arms and tell the council to go to hell.*

He stares down at the images like he doesn't know what he's looking at. When he finally speaks, his voice is careful in a way that makes my stomach drop.

"Serena." He says my name gently. Too gently. "You don't need to do this. You don't need to invent anything to keep my love, or to keep your place beside me. You never needed a child for that."

*He thinks I made it up?*

A small, breathless laugh slips out of me. “I’m not inventing anything.” My voice rises despite myself. “I heard it, Kael. I heard our child’s heartbeat this morning.”

"The Moon Cradle said otherwise last night. Blackthorn's healers have found nothing for years." He isn't cruel about it, isn't accusing, and somehow that's worse. "I think we need our own healer to confirm this before either of us decides anything."

"Our own healer." I laugh, short and humorless. "So a human doctor and an ultrasound mean nothing to you, but you'll believe it the second a Blackthorn healer says the same thing back to you?"

"That's not what I—"

"Then call...Go ahead and call someone." I fold my arms. "Right now, since you don't believe me. Don't send for anyone later, and don't wait for some convenient excuse to walk out of this room. Call them right now."

He looks at me for a long moment, then pulls out his phone.