Chapter Four: Nowhere to Belong

Ayla's pov

By the time I reached Silver fang pack territory, dawn was breaking.

I ran all night, the gravel of the forest biting into my bare feet, I refused to let Nyx take me since I wanted the pain, I needed it.

It would be proof that I was still alive after what he had done to me.

I stopped at the edge of the courtyard, wolves already gathering.

I caught the sight of Lila, of course she would be there, arms folded with a smug smile on her face, it was almost as if she was waiting for me.

I looked around while clutching the hem of my dress, it was as though everyone already knew what happened but then I walked with a straight face.

I didn't expect a warm welcome but I wished for at least familiarity. I wished for someone to share my grief.

As I reached towards our pack house, I walked into the pack yard and all I felt was dread.

Harsh voices rose instantly.

“What is she doing back here?"

"Didn't she leave with her prince charming?” Another called out.

" He probably sent her back, she never belonged there anyways”

“Useless wolf" another spat

When I got to the door, I reached for it but it swung open before I could barely feel the handle.

I took steps backwards as Beta Rowan stepped out through the door and stood there, he looked imposing and not very proud, his gaze swept over me, over my tangled hair and torn dress.

His eyes flickered something like.

Disgust.

And then hardened as they rested on me

“You,” he said as if accusingly, his voice slicing through my skin like a knife . “What are you doing here?”

I froze. “Father… I—”

“Don’t call me that!” he snapped and I paused. “Why are you back here?"

Before I could say anything, one of his daughters leaned in and whispered in his ears.

I could see the boiling rage in his eyes.

“You had one chance" he continued, stepping down from where he stood "one purpose. To shift. To make something of yourself, to bring to this family, honor!”

He scoffed as if realizing how impossible that was.

" And what do you do, transform into a wolf half the normal size and run off to another pack to embarrass the pack name!”

"Killian… he… there was confusion, and.." I tried to explain.

He raised a hand to silence me " spare me your delusional excuses. You were chosen by an Alpha. A rare opportunity and yet somehow you managed to ruin even that.”

“Told you she'd blow it” Lila's voice loudly. " No Alpha would actually want her,” she scoffed.

“Seems like you don't have a place even on the disappointment’s table" one of her minions giggled and others too.

More laughter

My breath shook “I didn't do anything”

“You have been nothing but a burden since the day I took you in" he stood back, disgust curling his lip “and tonight proves it."

My knees almost gave out, all these tragedy, all in one phase of time.

He was ashamed of me. My father. The man who raised me looked at me like I was a stain he wanted to scrub off his life.

“I'm sorry" my voice lowered “But I didn't ask for any of this.”

" No,” he agreed. " You didn't, but I refuse to suffer for your failure any longer.”

I turned to him suddenly and he straightened, clearing his throat.

“I renounce you, as my daughter, as a member of this family. You are nothing to me now”

He meant it

" Finally. Took him long enough” someone said in the crowd.

"Now she can just join the pack maids or maybe she can't even do that right”

A small voice rose in mockery in the crowd again.

I held back the pain I felt. It was no use crying, it was what he wanted and it was what everyone wanted.

Maybe this was best for me.

“No" I say with the last strength I had in me “I'll go. Far away"

‘Disappear from this planet’ Killian's voice rang in my ear and I held back tears as well.

"I'll go far away and you will never have to see me,” I continued.

"I can't think of any better idea” he scoffed and turned away from me.

I returned to my room in order to take what I would need.

I packed one bag and glanced at the wolf band around my wrist.

Without hesitation, I tore it off from my wrist and placed it on the table beside my bed.

“I brought supplies” Juno stepped into my room, holding a backpack. I wiped my eyes and forced a smile.

“You don't have to leave.." She came closer and held both my shoulders.

“There’s nothing for me here, Juno” I swung the bag I packed over my shoulders. "No one wants me here, not even the man who raised me”

"I could take you in, I could tell you…

"I'll never forget this kindness Juno” I genuinely smiled at her now "But I can't stay where I'm not wanted”

I left her in the room and approached the park yard where everyone, including the Alpha, anticipated my departure.

My father stood with his arms crossed, his cold expression made words disappear. I couldn't defend myself. I didn't want to, instead my eyes skimmed across the crowd.

The mean girls smiled and the warriors looked bored, everyone else looked relieved that I was being pushed out.

I turned to Juno amongst the crowd, she was the only one who had a softer expression as if begging me to stay back so that there may be some sort of hope.

But I knew there was none.

No one called me back as I walked towards the gates alone, broke and unbearably empty.

This was it, I crossed the boundary, the forest wind brushed against my skin, carrying away the last warmth of life I'd known.

'Where will we go?'

My wolf asked softly

“Anywhere but here." I replied.