I wiped the sweat off my forehead as I expertly piped a border of chocolate ganache onto the tray of freshly baked croissants.
It wasn't typical of me to sweat profusely during work hours despite the heat which escaped from the oven whenever Pastries were being baked. I felt some sort of feverishness that seemed to intensify the more work I did but I attributed it to work strain. “Entrepreneurship is not a child’s play,” I whispered to myself. I could never fully explain the joy I felt whenever I resumed work in the mornings. I was so proud of how much I’d captured the hearts of the people in the neighbourhood. My orders and supplies had tripled from a month ago when I started out but that was no easy thing to do. I tilted my neck to my left hand side and there was my assistant Ray sliding a tray of golden-brown scones into the oven. She was such a workaholic who loved her job. All I ever did was give her my recipe and she delivered the pastries just fine. “You have so much energy Ray; you’re so full of life,” I shouted grinning wildly from the spot where I stood, garnishing my croissants. “Thank you ma’am; I get my inspiration from you,” she responded with a smirk. I shrugged my shoulders pushing aside the first tray while bringing forth the one that was next. “Oh young lady, come off it,” I said to her with a wave of hands. “I wouldn’t be able to sort these bulky orders all by myself, you know. I’m so grateful for the gift of you and I hope no one contaminates your joyful and resilient spirit.” I never ceased to show to my employees how grateful I was to have them work with me. As I bowed my head onto my work surface so as to achieve a perfect finish, my head unexpectedly banged hard like a set of drums being hit by a performing instrumentalist and my vision became blurry, my eyes spinning like a stainless steel tray that just hit the bare floor. The more I tried to gain control of myself, the more I failed at it. I took some steps backward to find the wooden stool which I often sat with and I tripped and almost fell. ‘Holy Lord!’ this was certainly not me. “Ray darling, I can’t tell what’s wrong with me,” I said, calling to Ray who was now deeply engrossed in her work. “Oh madam, what could be the problem, she enquired, her voice laced with empathy and concern.” “I fear I might be having a little health challenge, a fever or something, my head hurts from a severe headache and my vision is blurry, I also feel extreme weakness and dizziness," I replied, wearing a worried face. “I’m so sorry about that, what are you gonna do now? I could stand in for you if you need to take some time off,” she suggested. “Oh dear, I don’t even know right now,” I responded, holding my head with my palm as if to support it from falling. I was seriously thinking how my business would function without my presence. As much as I knew I had help, I had trust issues too and I wasn’t about to entrust my newly established business to someone else, at least, not for too long. “Have you thought about seeing a physician?” She asked, interrupting my wandering mind. How did I not remember consulting a doctor though? I’d not seen the four walls of a hospital in five years except for my routine check-ups which I did in the laboratory so I guess that was the reason. “I should do that right away, thank you for reminding me what a hospital does,” I responded in appreciation. I muttered some words of affirmation under my breath and summoned the courage to stand up to go get my bag which contained my personal items. “I’ll be on my way now, do arrange the croissants on the display cases. Take good care of the shop please, I’ll be back in a jiffy,” I said as I walked out through the large door leading outside the shop. “Safe ma’am,” Ray’s voice echoed through the building. I moved a few minutes forward along the street and flagged down an oncoming cab. I got in through the door and settled in, exchanging brief pleasantries with the driver while telling him where I was headed. “We’re at Smith’s clinic,” came the voice from around me. I had dozed off a minute into the ride. I quickly jolted out of my sleep and handed him his fare. “Thank you,” I said calmly as I alighted from the car, and I didn’t care to hear his reply. I walked through the car park into the roofed hallway leading to the clinic’s entrance. Hospitals always smelt of drugs and I hated that for myself. “Hi, I need to see a doctor to conduct some tests on me,” I said to the receptionist at the counter with a sense of urgency. “Give me a minute," she replied as she put a call through to someone. “Kindly follow the passage through that door, the second door by the left is where you’re headed,” she said to me after hanging up.” Thank you,” I said, barely talking. My stomach rumbled as I found my way to the doctor following the instruction I was given. I was already seeing stars and feeling very light headed. I knocked on the door twice and opened it. “You’re welcome,” the doctor mentioned with a warm smile and I nodded my head in response. “You look really worn out, have your seat,” " he motioned to me with a hand gesture and I sat. “I’m Doctor Derrick and I’ll be attending to you. What brings you here ma’am?” He questioned me while flipping the file on his gold yellow desk. He was a cute guy with a nice pixie cut and a flirty smile. “My body feels weak and I feel lightheaded; my sight is blurry, my head hurts from severe ache and I threw up early this morning before work. I just have a general intense feverish feeling,” I said, repeating the same things I had said to Ray, my assistant. “These are quite familiar symptoms. Sit back and relax while your samples are taken for a test. You’ll be alright,” he assured me and then he put a call across to a nurse demanding her presence. My blood and urine samples were taken and handed over to the laboratory scientist while the doctor checked my vital organs. In a few minutes time, I was called in by the doctor, his countenance calm and unperturbed. I feared doctors so much because you could be passing away the next minute and they’ll show no sign of worry whatsoever. He handed me an envelope containing the test results. I held it for a minute, my hands trembling with fear for what my diagnosis might be. “Congratulations ma’am, you’re six weeks pregnant,” he said, stretching out his hands for a handshake.Three days. That’s how long it had been since I asked Nelson for space. Three days of silence. Three days of unanswered calls, unread texts, and a quiet so loud it echoed through every room of my apartment.I had needed it desperately and I was glad I asked for it. After what happened at the shop, after the shouting, the accusations, and the moment his anger turned physical, I had to step away to breathe. I had to remember who I was before the chaos and before he even walked into my life. Before Nelson, I was a gorgeous young hard-working lady who focused on her dreams and chased her goals while also raising her young daughter. I had a life before him and that was what I sought to live again.I needed to evaluate the relationship and its worthiness. I couldn't be part of a connection that wrecked me while pretending that it served me.But now, on the third night, I was curled up in my bed, wrapped in a blanket that smelled faintly of my cologne and I was missing him. This should b
I returned from picking up Hayley from the daycare that evening and after I'd successfully fed her, played with her, and put her to bed for the night, I sat alone, all by myself. For the first time in three months, I wasn't talking with Nelson on the phone; I was sitting in the quiet of my living room, thinking about my poor life decisions.I'd forced myself to the pharmacy to treat the cut that I'd sustained from being malhandled by him before going to pick up Hayley. How lost I was to not have felt that I'd been injured or to even feel the pain from it. I wondered what must have gone through the mind of the old lady who saw me looking all tattered and called my attention to the blood dripping from my forearm. I wondered if she heard the noise from inside the shop, the angry loud voice of Nelson, my crying voice, and the chaos. Secretly, I hoped she would forget about me and never ask again because neighbors could get nosy and judgmental sometimes and such negative attention was t
I tried to look away and focus on the ongoing conversation but my eyes wandered again to where he sat, and this time, he looked more furious than he did the last time.Instantly, I knew something was not right with him. He had probably lost a business deal or a contract and I began to feel more uneasy. I tried to communicate with him using my eyes, but he quickly looked away from me and started adjusting the collar of his dark brown t-shirt.Despite the tension that occurred in the room, Ken was oblivious to all of it. Somehow, he seemed to enjoy the conversation even more, elongating it and introducing more topics.I was fed up but I had to find a way to round up the long talk so that I could attend to Nelson, whose face looked like it could force down rain from the clouds. “You've got a real gift, May,” he said, appreciating my crafting on the cake, even though he’d mentioned that like ten times since he walked in.“Thank you, Ken” I responded, forcing a smile, and just then his c
Good sex, that was all I needed to clear my blurry vision and stressed body.After the first night at his house, I'd spent several others getting good meals that I didn't have to prepare (he always got take-outs for both of us) and good drilling which was always the highlight of the day.I loved to cook but he never let me use the kitchen. “I don't want you stressing yourself babe, you've already experienced the heat of the bakery all through the day,” he would say as he handed me the take-out that he bought from the fast food or restaurants. Whenever I was having a bad day, I either stopped by his place or I called him to pick me up, and usually after we'd eaten and talked for a bit, we would delve into the act, exploring each other’s bodies and discovering the nerve endings that would almost send our souls packing from our bodies.Nelson was so good, he had me thinking about the last night all through my day at work and even subsequent days. The way he held me and thrusted careful
My relationship with Nelson was fast blossoming into a beautiful one and we soon began to appear like a family in the eyes of the public especially when we went to pick up items from a stall or needed to do a quick shopping for the house, except I didn't let him get too close to Hayley.I'd created the unspoken rule in our relationship that he had no obligations to my daughter. She was my responsibility alone and I didn't ever want to have to forcefully involve him in her life.Whenever he came around and she was home, I let him play with her for a few minutes before they parted ways. That way, it felt better for me and I didn't need to feel bad about forcing the connection.I'd heard cases of single moms dating a man solely because they wanted a father figure for their kids and so when they found a guy, they saddled him with the forced responsibility of being a father, a role he did not ask for, and I didn't want that to be the case for me.Over here, I wanted it to be a relationship
Today was the day for the read deal, in Nelson’s words. After the party, he had not ceased to pay me endless visits at the pastry shop, showing up almost every single day under the guise that he had an order to pick up. Of late, I was beginning to question his sugar intake because pastries usually had a high percentage of sugar and sweeteners. He always got cupcakes and that in itself was not such a healthy choice especially for daily consumption.The last time we saw was two days ago and that evening after a busy day at work, he called as usual but this time, he sounded serious like he had something he wanted to tell me or an important message to pass across.“Nelson, you don't sound cheerful at all, what is the matter? Is there something you want to tell me? Is everything okay?” I asked, following his low tone. But he laughed, claiming that everything was okay.“I'm just tired from work, you know how running a large business empire can be.”Speaking about businesses, I didn't kno