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Penulis: Aya Starr
last update Terakhir Diperbarui: 2025-09-30 09:18:53

Coleen

By the time the last balloon had deflated and the final crumbs of pizza were thrown away, the apartment was quiet again. Jason and Logan had helped haul out the trash before stumbling off, still bickering about who’d cheated at charades.

Alicia had given me a knowing hug on her way out, whispering, “You did good, birthday boy’s girl.”

Mark had clapped Hayden on the back and promised to text him later.

Now, it was just the two of us.

Hayden leaned against the kitchen counter, his hair messy from running his hands through it all night. His smile hadn’t faded since the moment he walked in and saw the party. Even now, he looked at me like I’d hung the moon.

“You really outdid yourself,” he murmured.

I shrugged, pretending to be casual even though my heart was pounding. “Well, you only turn twenty once.”

He grinned. “Correction, you only turn twenty once with the best girlfriend ever.”

The word girlfriend still made my chest feel tight in the best way.

I cleared my throat. “Actually
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  • The Hockey Star Regret    154

    COLEENONE YEAR LATER…The music swelled softly through the open garden, the warm spring breeze brushing against my face as I stood under a canopy of white roses. The world felt suspended, every sound muted, every color brighter, every breath deeper.Hayden stood at the end of the aisle, his tux perfectly tailored, his expression somewhere between awe and disbelief. I felt my heart flutter in my chest, the same way it had the very first time he looked at me like I was the only person in the room.My father’s arm tightened around mine. “You ready, kiddo?” he asked, his voice gruff, but I could hear the crack beneath it.I swallowed hard, fighting the sudden lump in my throat. “Yeah,” I whispered, my voice trembling. “I’m ready.”He smiled at me, that small, crooked smile that always made me feel safe, and began walking me down the aisle.Each step felt surreal.Mark and Alicia sat near the front, their hands clasped together, both of them grinning like idiots. Jason and Logan stood besi

  • The Hockey Star Regret    153

    HAYDENThe restaurant was dimly lit, the golden glow from the chandeliers glinting off the champagne glasses and soft white linen. A string quartet played somewhere near the corner, the quiet hum of conversation filling the air, laughter, clinking cutlery, the occasional burst of applause from another table.But all I could think about was her.Coleen.She was laughing at something Alicia had said, her hand covering her mouth the way it always did when she was trying to hold it in. Her eyes sparkled, that same mix of mischief and warmth that made me fall for her in the first place.I still couldn’t believe I’d pulled this off.It had taken weeks of planning, countless phone calls with Mark, Alicia, and Jason even Coleen’s dad was in on it. Everyone had agreed she deserved a proper celebration, not just a diploma and a handshake.She thought it was just dinner with a few friends. She had no idea that every detail, from the soft pink flowers on the tables to the playlist I made of her f

  • The Hockey Star Regret    152

    COLEENTWO YEARS LATER…The sun was warm on my skin, the kind of golden that made everything feel like a dream. The university quad was overflowing with people, families clutching cameras, graduates tossing caps into the air, and the constant hum of laughter echoing through the campus I’d once walked through with trembling nerves and too many insecurities.And there I was. Standing in the middle of it all, in my navy graduation gown, summa cum laude stitched in gold across the sash resting proudly on my shoulders.When my name was called, the crowd erupted, but it was my father’s voice I heard first.“That’s my daughter!” he shouted, his voice cracking with pride. I spotted him in the stands, eyes shining as he waved both arms like he was signaling a rescue plane. My heart squeezed. I laughed and waved back before walking across the stage to accept my diploma.When I stepped down, Mark and Alicia were waiting for me with ridiculous grins and caps slightly askew. Mark whooped loudly, w

  • The Hockey Star Regret    151

    COLEENThe office smelled faintly of coffee, printer ink, and the kind of old paper that made my heart feel full. My summer internship at Rutherford & Pine Publishing had only just begun, and already, I’d fallen in love with the chaos.I sat at my cubicle, sorting through a stack of manuscripts so tall it looked like it might collapse at any moment. The office buzzed with low chatter phones ringing, keyboards clicking, someone laughing near the water cooler.I wasn’t an editor. Not yet. I wasn’t even allowed to read most submissions past the first ten pages unless assigned. My job was simple: log the manuscripts, make notes if something stood out, fetch coffee, file documents, and occasionally run errands for the senior assistants. It was grunt work. Exhausting. Repetitive. But I didn’t mind.Every day I was surrounded by books by writers whose words had made it through this same process. The thought made even the paper cuts worth it.Around noon, I took a break in the small kitchen.

  • The Hockey Star Regret    150

    COLEENThe email came early that morning.I was still in bed, tangled in my sheets, sunlight leaking through the blinds when my phone buzzed on the nightstand. Half-asleep, I groaned, reaching for it expecting some promotional spam or a campus newsletter. But then I saw the subject line.“Congratulations! You’ve made the Dean’s List for the Spring Semester.”I shot upright, my heart skipping. For a moment, I just stared at the words, blinking in disbelief. Then it hit and I let out a sharp gasp, clapping a hand over my mouth.“Oh my God,” I whispered. “I did it.”Before I could stop myself, I was laughing, falling back against the pillows, phone pressed to my chest. The months of late-night studying, balancing work at the athletic complex, the café, and classes, all of it had led to this moment.When I finally got up and walked to the bathroom mirror, I looked at my reflection and smiled. Not the small, polite smile I used to wear. A full one. Proud, content, earned.My phone buzzed w

  • The Hockey Star Regret    149

    HAYDENThe air inside the rink was electric. The crowd was deafening, a sea of our school’s colors blurring into a single living wave. Every cheer, every chant, every banging drum rattled straight through my bones.We were seconds away from the end. It was the Frozen Four Finals and our university hosting, and somehow, after all the chaos of the year, we’d made it here.The scoreboard blazed: 3–2 in our favor.Ten seconds left.I gripped my stick tighter, lungs burning, vision tunneling in on the puck sliding across the ice. My heart thudded so hard I could feel it echo in my ears.“Defense! Defense!” Coach bellowed from the bench.Jason slammed into an opposing player, stealing the puck and clearing it down the ice. The opposing goalie shot out of the net, their last desperate attempt to even the score. Logan darted ahead, caught the puck mid-pass, and shot it toward the empty goal.The puck hit the post.“Come on!” I shouted, skating hard, snatching the rebound, and flipping it in j

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