Chapter 1 - A different life

Libby POV

How can my caravan have so much condensation in one night.

All I do is breathe.

It’s not as if I am having wild rampant sex in it all night.

Although, I do often dream of a certain somebody licking me all over. Which then results in me waking in the early hours covered in sweat and a prolonged unsatisfied need that doesn’t leave me until mid morning. But it means I did wake up cold.

Thankfully, I had a good night sleep last night, no dreaming of a certain male who I promised myself I would never think about again.

What would be the point.

That was my past life.

As I make myself a morning cup of coffee, I push open my caravan door desperate to let fresh air circulate on this early spring morning. It was 5am and the sun still seemed hours away from rising and overpowering the soft moon’s glow.

It was dark, cold and silent...just how I liked it.

I was already wrapped in 4 layers of clothing, it was still cold in the mornings but nothing compared to the freezing nights of mid winter.

Only a few nights ago I had stopped sleeping in my dressing gown, which acted as a useful extra layer just to help me drift off.

Having only a pathetic fan heater to keep me warm in the snowy weather this winter, it was a struggle to get into bed at night knowing just how cold it would be when it came to getting out of bed the following morning.

Today is Sunday, my day off, but with the farming couple away it was my turn to feed the animals at dawn.

Once I finish my coffee, I head into the small compact bathroom to prepare for the day.

Feeling refreshed, I place my woolly hat on mentally preparing myself for being out in the cold morning air.

I’ve already heard the kettle boil again so that I can make a hot water bottle to keep in my coat. Honestly, I’ve never been so cold in all my life.

Fixing my hat in the mirror, the young woman looking back at me is a complete contrast to the one that used to be my reflection only 6 months ago.

Gone is the brown dyed hair, my blonde locks returning in their full vibrancy. I have no need to hide my natural hair colour anymore, there aren’t any cameras watching me here.

No chance of being spied on in the remote farm fields I now call my home.

Just how I wanted it.

Every morning as a ritual I check my phone. It is old, not a modern phone with a camera or the ability of internet...I only use it to make calls and send text messages.

That is all.

I can’t be traced using it, and that’s why it is perfect for me. The only downside to using such an old phone is that I struggle to find places to top it up. Often having to go to a traditional newsagents in the local town when necessary.

I check it daily for news from my Father.

Still nothing, this is the longest we have gone without speaking.

He was angry at me and I at him, but he was still my father. He was there for me when Mother died suddenly, I was only 12 years old.

No matter what has passed between us, we still shared a loving bond.

I head out of the bathroom into the narrow walkway as an odd sensation takes over me, my body doubling over in pain.

I grip onto the sides of the corridor plastic-like walls, a stabbing pain in my stomach so immense I want to scream out.

I know exactly what it is, and it isn’t the first time…

Finding the willpower, I move myself to my backpack which is always packed, always ready to go, and stored under the kitchen sink.

I keep it stored safely yet easily accessible, in case I need to leave at any moment.

Nothing for me is permanent still, I don’t think it ever will be again.

That’s okay, I can live with that. I’m not the same person since Mum died when I was 12. I’m not the same person since I came here over 6 months ago.

Searching through my backpack, I find the small pot, my heart sinking when I notice it is empty.

How can that be?

I thought I had more….

I search throughout my bag, throwing items of clothing out of my way, moving cash aside to reach the bottom. Praying internally that some had fallen to the very bottom…nothing.

Shit.

“I need more...” I hastily text out to the number on my mobile phone, hoping to get more by the end of the day. It was early to send a text but I was too desperate to wait.

A knock on the door has me automatically locking my phone and placing it in my coat pocket.

I had done quite well so far to remain off radar.

But I did curse myself when the farmer asked for my name on the first day and I gave it to him, not thinking to use an alias. But in the 6 months of being here, hardly anybody has ventured this way and only humans tend to the lands.

The caravan door opens, impatient as always he doesn’t even wait for me to answer it. Knowing him he was probably hoping to snuggle into bed and wake me up, it wouldn’t be the first time.

He walks in as if he also lives in this caravan and doesn’t have his own allocated spot. Always one to not read his social surroundings, or if he does, he just doesn’t care.

I’ve gotten used to his ways now and laugh off his odd behaviour

“What are you doing here?” I ask giving him a pointed look.

His dark brown eyes take on a devious lustful look as he takes a step towards me.

“I thought you might need warming up.”

“That’s what coffee is for..” I take a sip of my coffee before hurriedly placing my backpack’s contents away, unable to worry about how unorganised the contents are right now. I’ll have to sort it later, hopefully once I have some more time.

Throwing my scarf on and placing my hot water bottle into my coat, I purposely walk Anwir out of my caravan.

He was a close friend but I wasn’t stupid.

Not only was he drop dead gorgeous, but he had a bad boy streak to him and I didn’t trust myself to be in close proximity with him, especially with the caravan already steaming up.

There has already been a few close calls when alcohol is involved.

Men weren’t on my radar right now, and Anwir had something about him. Always looking at me intensely.

“I said I would happily keep you warm...”

“And I told you none of that. I’m not into men at the moment.” Or boys, Anwir was definitely younger than me, I would bet my week’s wages on it. But he did possess a confidence older than his years.

“I don’t believe you, I just think you need time to appreciate my charms.”

“Oh believe me I appreciate them, I just don’t fall for them.”

Anwir was one of my best friends here on the farm, as well as Ben and Beth. We spent every day together, Ben and Beth arriving only a few weeks before me.

Anwir arriving a week after me.

We eat all our meals together, work on the farm together, even enter the local town on our days off together....only being apart to sleep. Which is something Anwir often comments on.

He knows better than to wind Beth up. She’s only 14 and I am therefore the only one that can handle Anwir’s pent up sexual frustration.

I don’t know if it is because I am alone, but Anwir always makes a point of helping me when I am on roster to feed the animals.

He never offers to help anybody else, and Ben often takes Beth’s shift to let her rest. The work is hardcore, tough and heavy going...she did well to keep up.

The farming couple are away at the moment, the main house empty meaning we can’t access it for our meals. Resorting to using a campfire to heat up our meals, which is a pain staking task.

Returning to the main camping site after feeding the animals, we find some of the other workers already awake, huddled around their own fire...whilst Ben was lighting our own.

“I’m only reheating last night’s sausages and baked beans for breakfast....I can get some bread and cheese in town later if you want?” Ben smiles up at me, his smile not always extending to Anwir..there was a hidden male toxicity between the two of them.

They tolerate each other and sort of get along...but I have no doubt, if I left tomorrow...they wouldn’t make an effort with one another.

Ben was maybe 18 or 19, a similar age to me, we didn’t share a lot of actual facts with one another.

I think as we all were working for cash in hand on a farm, living in onsite accommodation spoke volumes…we were all hiding from something.

Ben was strong in character to argue against Anwir, he didn’t back down easily when Anwir was on one. Hence their power struggle type relationship.

“Sounds great, I’ll come with you. I need to top my phone up.”

“Why do you use that old phone? Why not join us in the modern century...it’s not the middle ages any more.” Anwir teasingly pulls out his own phone and flashes its top of the range design to me.

“I have my reasons.”

“Great, I’ll round Beth up and we can leave when ready.” Ben manages to light the fire, placing the pot on top.

“Anwir, are you coming?” I check, he sometimes had other plans and she was currently looking this way.

“Of course he is...” Ben quips.

“Meaning?” Anwir scoffs, taking a seat next to me on an old log.

“If Libby asked you to jump, you’d ask how high.”

“I’m not whipped, are you saying I’m whipped?”

“Perhaps.” Ben shrugs enjoying the way he is winding up Anwir.

“I’d happily be whipped for sex, but until Lib here gives me the goods...I’m sticking to my usual tactics.” His eyes hungrily flash over to the group of other workers, all of them not speaking the same language as us...they must have arrived illegally and found work quickly.

Naughty of the farming couple, but I’m the last to complain...it’s keeping me well hidden. The moment the illegals are found, I’ll be grabbing that backpack and moving on.

I roll my eyes as Anwir walks over to his regularly fling...his “usual tactics” had continued to watch us.

A pretty young woman with deep dark brown hair and a heavy fringe.

She often gives me the evils, thinking I am trying to compete for his attention.

I don’t know how he does it, but he speaks in their language. Making all the females giggle and blush. Except for Anwir, they keep to themselves as do we.

Once Ben returns with Beth, Anwir rejoins us as I start plating out our food. We talk amongst ourselves, eating our meal, until Anwir feels the need to place an arm around me, pulling me close to him. His movement doesn’t go unnoticed by Ben, his eyes now glaring at Anwir.

“What? She’s cold…she should be warmer. Always cold…”

“I’ve only just finished defrosting the pig’s water trough, of course I’m cold.” I retort annoyed at his closeness but secretly enjoying his warmth. Anwir usually ran at a cold temperature, so if he was warm…damn I must be freezing.

“Shall we meet back here in an hour?” Ben suggests as he puts out the fire, he and Beth having finished their breakfast.

“Sounds good I just…” My mobile phone vibrates in my coat pocket.

I manage to read it, standing up in the process to keep my privacy from Anwir. He was still that close to me.

“Meet me at the usual place, 12noon.”

Relief floods through me as I read the text message, checking the current time.

“Somethings come up that I need to check on, I’ll have to give it a miss.”