Chapter 1: Pack’s Disgrace

DEXTERA

Blood. Screams. A loud wailing howl. My crimson red dress which was previously cream coloured. Blood-soaked fingers. Dark stares from people around, surrounding me. The lifeless giant white wolf just at my feet.

"Monster....Cursed one...Devil sent to us....Devil among us...." The words resonated around me from every corner of the Bisclaveret pack.

"Kill her! She should be put down!!"

A fully armed angry mob of angry pack members surrounded me, all ready to end my life. A reflection of light flashed from a sword raised above my head....

"Aargh...no, please...." I screamed, bolting upright on my bed. I was asleep and it was a dream.

A dream.

"You're still asleep, girl?" Valeria walked in after hearing me scream. "It's time to get up."

I didn't pay attention to her. My mind was still reeling from the aftermath of the dream —the very same dream I've had over the years with no single change in it's recurrence or the way it played out.

Perhaps, it's because it wasn't just a dream, but a memory that has haunted me for a very long time now.

"Are you even listening?" Valeria stood in front of my bed, clean folded clothes in her hand. "Have you forgotten what today is?"

Still in a daze from sleep, I cock an eyebrow at her. "What day is it?"

Valeria walked closer, smacking my forehead slightly. "Today is the 15th of this month."

She announced, worried. That's right. 15th Lunar day of the month. How could I forget the very day every being in the Bisclaveret pack are wary of me?

"What are you going to do this time?" Valeria's question snapped me out of my reverie.

I let out a loud sigh, burying my head in my palms. "Sincerely, I have no idea. We both know this thing is uncontrollable for me."

Valeria was the only one I could turn to for help in the pack, since every other Bisclaveret pack members tried their best to stay away from me.

I was a monster. The cursed one.

My family was no exception. Being the Beta's child, I was different. I was a wolfess, monsterous Omega with no mother. All I was left with was my step mother and my sassy, cunning, step sister, Adira who got mated to my fated mate.

"Are you going to ask him for help again?" Valeria asked.

Him. Kestrel Wagner, the Alpha of Bisclaveret Pack, my fated mate who I've loved ever since we were teenagers. His father was the Alpha of the pack, mine was the Beta.

"I can't, Valeria." I shook my head in pain. "You know I can't."

«You are not my mate. You are not my equal. You are nothing but a burden I was forced to bear, my father's murderer....I, Kestrel Wagner, Alpha of the Bisclaveret Pack, reject you, Dextera Neville, as my mate.»

These words never stopped echoing in my head. They served as a relentless reminder of his raw hatred for me.

Valeria snapped her fingers in front of me. "If you ask me, I'll say you still give it a try."

"Kestrel will never give in. He'll never help me."

The reason I needed Kestrel's help on days like this was because the witch healer stated that only a part my fated mate being fed to me on those days can keep me sane —his blood or semen especially.

Kestrel was compelled to be with me on these days when his late father, Alpha Nelson was alive. But he only had eyes for Adira. She seduced him with tricks totally ignoring the sacred bond meant to be between us. Now, he has bonded with her as his chosen mate.

Ever since their mating ceremony, he never paid me attention. Well, except when it was time for his pleasure. If there was anything Kestrel needed me for, it was sex and nothing more. I wanted more than that. I wanted to be with him; mind, body and soul. No doubt, he wanted me too, but was blinded by the pure indescribable hatred for me.

I killed Alpha Nelson, his father, on one of my feral nights. That was my sin. But it wasn't my fault.

"It's almost night, Dextera." Valeria was scared to the core. "Who knows what will happen this time? The last time, you injured..."

I cut her short, knowing exactly what she wanted to say. "I dismembered a guard and almost killed a young pup."

"Exactly my point, Dextera." Valeria affirmed, with extreme concern. "You don't need this stubborness right now."

After a moment of back and forth with Valeria, she successfully convinced me to meet Kestrel, plead with him to keep me sane.

Then, there was a knock.

"Dextera Neville, you're called for." The voice of a young guy uttered from the door.

Valeria scrambled to her feet, rushing to open the door. "Who called for her?"

"The Alpha." The young voice replied. "He needs her in five."

Five minutes? What for? Sex? Whenever Kestrel gave time for my presence, it was a call for sex. However, Kestrel made it clear that he was never going to lay with me on my feral nights. And he never did.

Could he have a change of mind?

Quickly, I slipped into a short, knee-length gown, headed for his quarters.

"Play it cool, Dextera." Valeria whispered after me. "Don't be stubborn."

I rolled my eyes at her, leaving with the messenger who waited outside my door. Following behind him, I gently hoped it was for sex. At least, I wouldn't go feral tonight.

"Wait here, please." The messenger paused and signalled to a waiting guard.

What's with the protocol? This was unusual. The messenger whispered something I couldn't hear to the guard. Then, the guard gestured for me to follow him and I did.

The route. I knew the place. It led to a secluded part of the pack house. I followed without making a sound till we stopped. Kestrel was right in front.

My heart pounded as I took a step forward, the atmosphere tense with pin-drop silence. His sharp blue eyes were locked on me, showing nothing but disdain.

It was evening already and the moon was slowly brightening up.

I swallowed hard, forcing myself to break the silence.

"Why are we here?" I asked as calmly as I could despite the unease curling in my stomach. "Why not your quarters?"

Kestrel's expression darkened. "Do not question me, Dextera," he snapped. "You do not get to question your Alpha."

My lips pressed into a thin line. This was nothing new. He never treated me with kindness; not in public, not in private, not ever. But there was something different about this night. The energy in the air was heavier and more hostile.

Soon, the heavy sound of approaching boots filled the hallway.

I turned my head just as a group of guards entered, each carrying massive chains made of thick, gleaming silver. But these weren’t ordinary chains. Barbed thorns jutted out from the links, designed to dig into flesh, to pierce deep and draw blood.

Along with them, they brought a large contraption, an iron collar lined with wolfsbane spikes on the inside, connected to a set of wrist and ankle cuffs by heavy locks and rods meant to keep their victim in a rigid stance.

"What is this?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.

Kestrel’s gaze remained impassive as he spoke, his words like ice cutting through me.

"I can't let you murder any more of my pack members like you did to my father." He replied without warmth or hesitation. "This was designed specifically to restrain you when you go mad."

My entire body tensed as my nails dug into my palms. A part of me wanted to plead, to tell him that it wasn’t my fault, that I never wanted to kill Alpha Nelson. But I knew better. Kestrel never listened to me since the incident and he never cared.

Whatever I said happened were all lies to him.