the one who falls last

Chapter 17

The sand was cold beneath my feet, when I stepped into the training ground again, my body has not fully recovered.but I couldn't give up now.

I felt in in my shoulders , legs and arm . perhaps all over my being. , but still I stood there .

Today felt different, the worriors where already forming groups, there was a strange energy in the air like something was about to snap.

Roshan stood at the centre of the training ground, his posture staright and expression unreadable.

"Today," he said we fight in rotation.

Murmur rippled through the worriors, each one glancing at each other.

"You will not choose your opponent," he continued.you will not rest untill ordered to.

You will fight untill you're told to stop.

I felt fear instantly.this was not a drill meant for the weak.

I took my place in the line, I could feel all eyes on me, curious now not mocking like the one they had before.that was somehow worst , curiousity meant they expected me to fail in a new way.

The first opponent stepped forward, he was fast, faster then me by far . I told myself it's just about the mind not the strength he carries ....or maybe it was.

That moment gave the signal, the worrior attacked.i barely had time to raise my blade before the impact rattled my hand, pain shot through my writ immediately.

I stumbled hard against the cold floor.

Stay up, Roshan voice came , calm and authoritative.

I forced my feet to move , the second strike caught my side not hard enough to break anything.but enough to steal my breath. I went down on one knee.

A few worriors laughed.

I forced myself up .

the fight ended quickly after that, I was disarmed and sent aside.

I did not look at anyone as I walked back to the line.

One down , I told myself. Many more to go.

The second opponent was heavier and stronger.

this time around, I lasted longer. Not because I was better ,but because I learnt to move away, instead of meeting force with force .

My arms burned badly, and my lungs were screaming for help but I never gave up I kept pushing and never withholding.

I fell again, and sand filled in my mouth.

I spat it out immediately and got up.

The third opponent sneared at me openly, " you're wasting everyone's time ."

I did not answer.

He struck harder than the others, I blocked wrong and felt a slight jolt on my arm.

The sword nearly slipped from my grip, my vision swamped.

I thought of stopping for a brief moment.

Then I remembered the corner of the training ground.my forehead pressed against the coldwall, the word burden echoing in my thought.

I tightened my grip and stayed upright.

When I finally fell of my back,

"Enough" someone said, "she's done "

I waited for Roshan to agree, but he didn't.

"Next" he said

I swayed , but I didn't pull away, if I sat down , I knew I would not stand again.

The next opponent hesitated.

That surprised me.

He glanced at Roshan, then at me. " You sure ?"

Yes , Roshan replied.

We fought .

I lost.

again.

and again.

By the fifth time, my legs barely obeyed me , my sword felt like it weighed more than my own body.

My breath came shallow and uneven.

I could hear my own heartbeat pounding into my hears, my wolf stirred faintly inside me , restless and unhappy.

Get up , I told myself get up.

I pushed myself up, my hand shook violently for a moment I thought I would collapse face into the sand .

Then I stood.

A few worriors exchanged looks.

The sixth opponent was smaller than the others , quick and precise, he stuck my legs, then my shoulder, I dropped again.

The pain bloom hot.

I gasped rolling into my side , this time my body refused to move.

Tears burned behind my eyes , not from sadness, but from frustration and rage.

I clenched my fist into the sand.

I'm not done yet.

No one Heard me or maybe they did.

Cauae when I pushed up again, slowly and painfully a ripple went through the crowd .

"She's insane" someone muttered.

Maybe I was.

My last opponent stepped forward, he looked at me before he finally lifted his sword.

I won't go easy, he said quietly.

I don't want you too.

The fight only lasted a few minutes, I was slower now , my reaction dulled one clean strike knocked the sword out of my hand , another sent me crashing to the ground.

I layed there staring at the sky, "yield , someone said quietly."

I swallowed.

My body screamed me to stop , to accept the truth everyone spoke about me.

I rolled unto my side and pushed back up.

My legs buckled , I caught myself on my hands and knee.

Sand stuck to my skin, to my clothes to my hair.

Still I rose.

I didn't have a weapon

I did not have the strength, but I stood up.

Roshan stood forward then , that's enough.he said .

Relief wahed though me that my legs almost gave out again.

Training ended in silence.

As the worriors began to disparse, I remained were I wad Breathing hard and head bowed.

" You fell everytime," he said.

I nodded ,I know.

" But you stood everytime too", he said

I looked up at him , his eyes were unreadable.But there was something there something sharp and restrain.

You were the last to stop standing, he continued.

I swallowed hard.

Around us worriors passed without comment. A few nodded at me and others Avoided my gaze entirely.

Respect, I realise does not always come with words .

Roshan turned away, rest tomorrow will be worst.

I almost smiled , As I walked through the corridor, Every step felt like fire , but inside me something felt steady, i had fallen.

But I had not disappeared.

And for the first time since I arrived here I knew one thing was certain, they would never look at me the same way again.