Chapter 40

Rosemary

I woke up with the urge to throw up again. Untangling myself from Ethan’s embrace, I quickly ran to the bathroom, feeling my stomach twist violently. After making sure I had emptied everything, I changed into fresh clothes and quietly sneaked out of the room. The air outside was cool, a stark contrast to the heaviness in my mind, and I found myself wandering through the pack’s grounds aimlessly.

As I entered the woods, the shadows of the trees stretched before me, illuminated by the soft glow of the moon. The silence of the night was almost comforting as I found a spot by a tree and began to undress. Shifting came quicker now, though the sensation still made my skin feel like it was aflame, and the cracking of my bones was something I hadn’t yet gotten used to. But once I stood on all fours, a sense of freedom surged through me. Being in my wolf form felt like stepping into a part of me I never knew was missing.

I started running, the wind rushing past my fur, my senses heightened by the cool night air. But something was off. I tried to connect with my wolf, expecting the conversation that Ethan had described - a bond, a sense of unity. Yet, all I heard was silence. It was disorienting. Even though I was physically a wolf, I felt alone in my mind.

After what felt like hours of running, my body felt lighter, but the emotional weight still clung to me. I returned to the tree where I had left my clothes and shifted back. As soon as I pulled my jeans on, nausea hit me again, and I doubled over, throwing up near the bushes.

I couldn’t ignore it anymore. Ethan had been right - I needed to see the pack doctor. Reluctantly, I made my way to the infirmary.

The building was quiet, and as I entered through the clear doors, a guard directed me to the third floor, where the on-call doctor worked. I found myself walking through a corridor filled with dark, empty offices. Knocking on the door labeled “Night Doctor,” a soft voice told me to come in.

Behind the desk sat a woman, probably just a few years older than me, with sandy curly hair and a freckled nose. She stood and gave me a slight bow. “Hello, Luna, how can I help you?”

I still wasn’t used to the title, but I let it slide. I took a seat and gestured for her to do the same. She introduced herself as Bella, the night shift doctor.

“I’ve been throwing up for a while now. At first, I thought it was nerves from my first shift, but it hasn’t stopped,” I explained, hoping for some clarity.

Bella nodded, thinking for a moment. “It’s rare for werewolves to get sick from common things like stomach bugs or food poisoning. When did you last experience your heat?”

“My what?” I asked, completely thrown off.

“Your heat,” she repeated gently. “The female reproductive system of werewolves doesn’t work like the human one. Instead, we go through a heat cycle, where our body temperature rises and our sexual drive increases. You might not have recognized the signs because you’re new to this world, but it’s a normal part of our reproductive system. I can assume you would think you had a fever if you didn’t know what was happening. Did you feel something like that recently?”

I blinked at her, utterly confused. “I can’t recall feeling like that. I’ve never had a period, and human doctors told me I couldn’t get pregnant. I grew up thinking I was infertile.”

Bella’s expression softened. “That might explain things, but your body works differently as a werewolf. If you didn’t use protection, there’s a chance you might be pregnant. Let’s run a blood test to be sure.”

Her words hit me like a sledgehammer. I had never imagined myself as a mother. After growing up in the foster system, I had promised myself that I would never bring a child into this world. I had been relieved when the doctors told me I couldn’t conceive. But the idea of pregnancy now, especially with everything going on, brought me to the edge of panic. Ethan and I didn’t use protection while having sex, but I didn’t use them while sleeping with humans, and I never had problems with that before.

I followed Bella to the nurse’s station, where a nurse took my blood for testing. The entire process felt surreal, like I was watching it happen from outside my body.

Back in Bella’s office, she explained that the results would be ready tomorrow after the lab technicians processed the samples.

“Thank you for your help,” I said, my voice quieter than I expected. “Please, can you keep this between us for now? I’d like to process it before anyone else knows.”

“Of course, Luna. This stays between us,” she promised.

As I walked out of the building, the first hints of sunrise broke through the horizon. Normally, I would find comfort in the sight of a new day, a fresh start. But all I felt was a sinking sense of despair.

I couldn’t shake the weight of uncertainty that now hung over me.